Wise Coach – Naive Coach


I was reading this commercial from Tony Robbins’ Newsletter ”

When someone asks you for help, how do you respond?

The naive coach tends to “over-commit.”

They feel this heartfelt pressure to help the person, so the say, “Yes! Let me share my solutions with you. I’m committed to your change. Let’s make it happen!”

Why is this naive? Because if you rush in too much as a coach, you might scare the client away!

Or worse yet, you are seen as a “nagging” friend giving them unwanted advice. Ever experience that?

The wise coach knows better. They say, “Great. I’d love to help you.”

Then the wise coach thinks to themselves, “Let’s figure out what kind of client this is.”

You see, there are four different client types. The four types have different goals. They work at different speeds.

And they have completely different expectations for their coach.

When the naive coach “rushes in” to help, they miss out on the client’s type.

They miss what’s really going on.

The wise coach first understands the client’s type, and proceeds accordingly.

Which coach do you think is more effective?

If you ever find yourself giving advice to someone who doesn’t seem to benefit… I have something for you.

Today we will be sharing one of our top strategies for bringing faster, more profound change to coaching clients.

It will also work on anyone in your life who needs your help.”

I come into the later category of coaches – the Naive Coach! I tend to commit fast, stay committed for long and rarely have I failed.

I believe that Flirting Mentor is an Oxymoron just as a term like Naive Coach is, IMHO.   A TRUE coach or mentor is neither naive nor a Flirt ! Serious coaches are Committed people and whether they commit early or later is a matter of their mind’s processes and early or late decision making capabilities/ habits – nothing else!

 

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Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #4. how coaching helps


Abstract: Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees .M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager , something he does not have a lot of experience on . At their first meeting , S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him , just to get acquainted .  In the subsequent meetings , Stanley and Morgan discussed what ‘s strengths and weaknesses were , and what the improvements in skill-sets were that Morgan had to bring back to his job . Over the next few months ,M and S regularly update their progress . They also discuss game play , tactics ,  and team building .

Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees. M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager, something he doesn’t have a lot of experience on. He has been given the task to manage one of the teams in the company, so he sought help from a company coach to help him in understanding the requirements for the job, and to cultivate the right approach for the job. M enrolled for a two day per week course, and was assigned a coach named Stanley, who would be coaching him for the next few months.

S started by asking M to carry a workbook with him, in which M will keep a record of the discussions and guiding points that Stanley will provide to him during the learning. At their first meeting, S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him, just to get acquainted. Then they discussed how they are going to work together, and with other people, in realizing the goals that have been set.

In the subsequent meetings, S and M discussed what M’s strengths and weaknesses were, and what the improvements in skill-sets were that M had to bring in him to excel at his job. Over the next few months, M and S met regularly to understand and analyze their progress.

They also spent time on discussing game play, tactics, and team building. Stanley constantly referred to his old coaching logs and M’s own workbook as evidences of improvement and encouraged Morgan to keep pushing his boundaries. Mock grills and role-plays were organized to check M’s improvement in team-managing under diverse and difficult scenarios.

At the end of the coaching, M commented on how useful he found the coaching process and how it made him realize the potential inside him that he had no idea he possessed. He is now a successful team-manager and a part-time coach himself to the new employees who join the company.

 

Mind is a good servant, but a bad master!


The Purpose Of Life Is Not Happiness: It’s Usefulness


You buy something, and you think that makes you happy.
You hook up with people, and think that makes you happy.
You get a well-paying job you don’t like, and think that makes you happy.
You go on holiday, and you think that makes you happy.

via The Purpose Of Life Is Not Happiness: It’s Usefulness

I liked this parable : Mathew 13


The Parable of the Sower (sometimes called the Parable of the Soils) is a parable of Jesusfound in the three Synoptic Gospels in Matthew 13:1-23, Mark 4:1-20, and Luke 8:4-15.

In the story, a sower sows seed and does so indiscriminately. Some seed falls on the path (wayside) with no soil, some on rocky ground with little soil, and some on soil which contained thorns. In these cases the seed is taken away or fails to produce a crop, but when it falls on good soil it grows, yielding thirty, sixty, or a hundredfold.

Jesus then (only in the presence of his disciples) explains that the seed represents the Gospel (the sower being anyone who proclaims it), and the various soils represent people’s responses to it (the first three representing rejection while the last represents acceptance.

I’m a gardener Mentor. I try and die the seeds to make Dreams grow into ambitions, translating into Vision, mission, goals, objectives, action plans, biz, marketing plans etal.

In my efforts, sometimes I come across very distressed mentees. I have to work on making the soil good as they have rocky soil of past bad experiences, thorny soil which does not allow seeds to germinate, or find soil. I spend 5, 13, 26, 52 weeks depending upon the STATE, and SITUATION.

I Sometimes come across Sand, silt or clay land or simply rocky land. Rarely I find delta land ( usualy in C Suite execs) which is fertile . Each gets a different mentor treatment.

It works. There are failures too. As the mentorees stop responding and throw seeds on footpath – it is eaten by birds and pigeons.

In one case, after sowing 150 revenue ideas and rigorously, tilling the land I found failure. I decided to move on. As the farmer/ mentoree just did not understand and allowed my gardening efforts fail.

Sad but true! It happens.

Gardener then moves on too…

Jay’s Quick Poetry-The Sharp And Grand Rock


Short story that inspired me to write a Quick Poem below

Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls — family, health, friends, integrity — are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life.

The Sharp And Grand Rock

A Poem by Jay Parkhe

Whose rock is that? I think I know.
Its owner is quite angry though.
He was cross like a dark potato.
I watch him pace. I cry A’llo.

He gives his rock a shake,
And screams you’ve made a bad mistake.
The only other sound’s the break,
Of distant glasses and bars awake.

The Rock is sharp, Grand and deep,
But he has promises to keep,
Tormented with nightbirds he never sleeps.
Revenge is a promise a man must keep.

He rises from his flat bed,
With thoughts of violence in his head,
A flash of rage and he sees red.
Without a men-O-pause you turned and fled.

With thanks to the poet, Robert Frost, for the underlying structure

Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job


via Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job