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Don’t Try to Be the “Fun Boss” — and Other Lessons in Ethical Leadership

via Don’t Try to Be the “Fun Boss” — and Other Lessons in Ethical Leadership

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Creativity, Random Phrases and my Yesterday :)

  1. Drive Me Nuts Meaning: To greatly frustrate someone. To drive someone crazy, insane, bonkers, or bananas.
  2. No-Brainer Meaning: Anything that requires minimal brain activity to accomplish.
  3. Hands Down Meaning: Anything that’s easy or has no difficulty; something that is a certainty.
  4. Greased Lightning Meaning: Very fast or quick.
  5. Easy As Pie Meaning: Something that is easy.
  6. Lickety Split Meaning: To go at a quick pace; no delaying!
  7. On the Same Page Meaning: Thinking alike or understanding something in a similar way with others.

Competing for Shoppers’ Habits

Global Consumer Insights Survey

via Competing for Shoppers’ Habits

Saturday- RAK Movement – Random Acts of Kindness

  1. Remember that family member you haven’t seen for a while? See how they are doing
  2. Make an effort to get to know someone you don’t usually talk to
  3. Save water – take a shorter shower today
  4. Make someone a cup of coffee
  5. Save your family some time and buy their groceries
  6. House chores can be tiring – offer a helping hand
  7. Feeling brave? Give blood
  8. Be proactive – sign a petition for a good cause
  9. Help a younger student with their work
  10. We rarely listen to others – ask someone about their day

Title: Build Your Business With Four Easy Steps

 

Word Count:
555

Summary:
Building a business is not easy. This easy to read step by step guide shall provide an outline to starting a business in just four easy steps.

 

Keywords:
Building, business, step by step, guide, outline, four easy steps. 

 

Article Body:
Creating a successful and profitable business is not easy. Initially, external factors, such as competition, timing and demand, with scant or little contol bother us.  We aspire to have sound business plan. In order to lead a successful business we must assume that external factors shall favour us. The five steps we consider while building our business from the ground up:

1. Determine your business. What are you selling?
This question is not as easy to answer as you may think. For example, Nike is in the sportswear business, but the truth is that when you buy a pair of Nike shoes and a t-shirt at the mall we are buying a lot more than sportswear; you’re buying an image, a feeling. You’re buying the Nike brand. For example  someone who is in speciality retial business may say, ìconvenience or “innovation” before they specify any particular industry.  Your brand is what sets your product apart from your competitors.

 

2. Select your market. Who are you selling to?
This step is a bit less interpretive as the first, though equally important. Who are you selling to? or more importantly, what do you know about this person? Understanding your consumer is a key to success. What do they do? Where do they hang out? What do they watch on television? These are just a few of the questions that you should be able to answer about your consumer. Knowing the answers to these questions can answer a lot of questions of your own when it comes to a devising a marketing strategy. We have to understand our market with “amazing ability to figure out the things that people want to have.” This ability to perceive our consumer’s desire can only be a result of knowing them like our neighbor.

 

3. Create a marketing strategy. How do you speak to these people?
This is a culmination of understanding your brand and your consumer. As mentioned in number two, understanding our consumer can answer a lot of questions concerning our marketing strategy: Where should you advertise? What’s the voice of your brand? What kind of prices are reasonable for this demographic? In order to engage your consumer, a.k.a. sell your product to them, you must know where your advertisements will be noticed, how to speak to them, and how much they will be able to spend, among many of things. Really, this step should have been combined with the last because who your market is dictates your marketing strategy entirely.

 

4. Learn by example. Seek advice from those who have done it.
There are many books written by professionals who have already started their own business and have been successful in doing so.

Remember, building a successful business in not all about the Rupees and Paise. Equally as valuable is you brand equity and your ability to engage your consumer, which is only attainable by understanding them. Assuming there is a demand for your product, and you can compete with the other brands, following these four steps shall guide you in the right direction.

 

 

Wise Coach – Naive Coach

I was reading this commercial from Tony Robbins’ Newsletter ”

When someone asks you for help, how do you respond?

The naive coach tends to “over-commit.”

They feel this heartfelt pressure to help the person, so the say, “Yes! Let me share my solutions with you. I’m committed to your change. Let’s make it happen!”

Why is this naive? Because if you rush in too much as a coach, you might scare the client away!

Or worse yet, you are seen as a “nagging” friend giving them unwanted advice. Ever experience that?

The wise coach knows better. They say, “Great. I’d love to help you.”

Then the wise coach thinks to themselves, “Let’s figure out what kind of client this is.”

You see, there are four different client types. The four types have different goals. They work at different speeds.

And they have completely different expectations for their coach.

When the naive coach “rushes in” to help, they miss out on the client’s type.

They miss what’s really going on.

The wise coach first understands the client’s type, and proceeds accordingly.

Which coach do you think is more effective?

If you ever find yourself giving advice to someone who doesn’t seem to benefit… I have something for you.

Today we will be sharing one of our top strategies for bringing faster, more profound change to coaching clients.

It will also work on anyone in your life who needs your help.”

I come into the later category of coaches – the Naive Coach! I tend to commit fast, stay committed for long and rarely have I failed.

I believe that Flirting Mentor is an Oxymoron just as a term like Naive Coach is, IMHO.   A TRUE coach or mentor is neither naive nor a Flirt ! Serious coaches are Committed people and whether they commit early or later is a matter of their mind’s processes and early or late decision making capabilities/ habits – nothing else!

 

3 Cold Calling Mistakes that Trigger Rejection

 

Word Count:
710

Summary:
In our efforts to HyperScale the business in the formative stage of the business, an Entrepreneur – willy-nilly, beegins Cold Calling upon advice. In the old cold calling mindset, we are taught to focus on the sale and be completely confident that what we are offering is something the other person should/must buy.

 

As the Startup business begins to gain scale and there builds a pressure on the SMEs to HyperScale due to pressure on Breakeven, Investor push etc. they begin to use some of the oft-repeated menthods to bring the Sales volumes up. One of them is Cold Calling.
Here are 3 common cold calling techniques that we should avoid:

Mistake #1: Center the conversation around us and what we have to offer

In this old approach, we introduce ourself, explain what we do, and suggest a benefit or feature of our product. And then we close our eyes and pray that the other person will be interested

Unfortunately, the moment you stop talking you usually hear,

“Sorry, I’m busy,” or “Sorry, I’m not interested.”

  • We’ve started your cold call by talking about your world and what you have to offer. But realistically, most people aren’t all that interested in you. When you talk about your company and your product, it’s just another advertisement to them. We haven’t engaged them, so they often just “turn the page.”
  • Prospects are much more interested in themselves and whatís important to them. So if you start the conversation by focusing on their world, theyíre more likely to interact with you.
  • So instead, talk about an issue or problem they may need solving. Focus on them rather than on what you have to offer. And see where it takes you.

Mistake #2: Be confident they should buy your product or service

In the old cold calling mindset, you’re taught to focus on the sale and be completely confident that what youíre offering is something the other person should buy.

  • The problem with this approach is that you havenít asked them to determine this along with you. So think about it ñ in the old mindset, youíre really deciding for someone else whatís good for them. I know this isnít intended, but thatís exactly what comes across to your prospects.
  • So rather than being full of confidence and enthusiasm, stop for a minute and think about the other individual. Relax into a real conversation instead of moving into a persuasive strategy or sales pitch. Put yourself in their shoes and invite them to explore along with you whether what you have to offer is a match for them.
  • Others really can distinguish the difference. Youíre inviting them to see if you might be able to help them solve a problem. This makes for a much better connection right at the beginning, and youíll get that immediate rejection reaction much less.

Mistake #3: When someone brings up an objection, try to overcome it

You know, one of the reasons cold calling is so difficult is that sometimes you may not be very familiar with the other person and their business. When you make that first call, you donít know very much about their issues, problems, budget, and time constraints.

Chances are, not everyone is going to benefit by your product or service.

  • So realistically, your company or product isnít going to be a match for everyone. And yet, when someone brings up an objection (“we donít have the budget for that,” etc.), the old cold calling mindset trains you to “overcome,” “bypass,” or “override.”
  • But when you do that, you put the other person on the defensive. Something theyíve said is being dismissed. And hereís where rejection can happen very suddenly.
  • So it ís much better to listen to their concerns and continue to explore whether what youíre offering makes sense for them. There are some wonderful phrases you can use that validate their viewpoint without closing the conversation.
  • So now youíve discovered the 3 major cold calling mistakes people often make. See if you can shift away from those old self-sabotaging mindsets. When you do, youíll notice that people will engage you much more, and the immediate rejection youíve grown so accustomed to will happen much less.

Thursday Mentor – Free Verse by Jay Parkhe

Greed 2.0

Free verse by jay

Because I could not lead with Greed,
it did kindly lead for me.
Greed, Greed, every where,
Yet not a Rupee to lead.

I cannot help but stop and look at the Alchoholic’s selfishness.
Does the selfishness make you shiver?
does it?

Pay attention to the stupid,
stupidity is the most brilliant fault of all.
Stupidity is glorious. stupidity are bright,
stupids are smart as a whip, however.

Pay attention to the egotists,
egotists are the most zany vanity of all.
Do egotists make you shiver?
do they?

Wednesday Column – Jay Parkhe’s creative Mentoring – Random Slogan Generation.

In my Mentor Column on Wednesdays Jay Mentor discusses with readers the Slogans. Do you have a Slogan? Have a look at the ones I chose for you below. Any of them make sense to you? Relevant to you? Appealing to you.

Do you think, you can expand, modify, change a wee bit and make these slogans look and work Great for you. Slogans are not merely for shouting from the hooters or rooftops – people like leaders who walk the talk.

Do you have it in you? Please go ahead and create and share your creation in the comments. I shall respond ASAP.

  1. It’s in your hands.
  2. Little miracles.
  3. Experience is key.
  4. Pushing the limits.
  5. The time is now.
  6. More than just a taste.
  7. Never stop dreaming.
  8. Be more.
  9. Redefining impossible.
  10. Shh, it’s a secret.

Tuesday Column – Jay Parkhe and 10 Character Goal Generator Random Ideas.

Every Tuesday: Jay Parkhe The Mentor shall share with you 10 Random Ideas as Character Goal Generator.

Read all of them.

See which one appeals you most and Think Why?

Is this adaptable? Do you wish to have a Character Goal like this ? Reall?

Think again or choose another. If not, Stick with it for life or re-write your own goal in your own words.

  1. Free the animals.
  2. Save a deity.
  3. Make a sacrifice for the greater good.
  4. More power.
  5. Resolve their guilt.
  6. Clear a family member’s name.
  7. Travel in space.
  8. Restart the world.
  9. Find a more interesting life.
  10. Abandon an ideology.

How are these for a starter? Some may be confusing. Leave them. Some may be weird – leave as they are randomly chosen. Leave also those that do not appeal to you.

If you can’t find what you like best – wait till next Tuesday 🙂

Monday Column – 10 Mottos of Life – Random Pick

Take a Random Pick of the Motto. Think about it. Relate it to your life stage.

See meaning into it. Compare your life state and Facts with the words. Do they resonate? Is there a message there for you?  Can you choose one of these Random lines as your Motto for the Rest of your life?

  1. Spirits guide us, spirits watch over us.
  2. Sword or pen, we conquer all.
  3. Actions bring results
  4. Peace, prosperity, progress.
  5. Hope, homeland, honor.
  6. Haven of peace.
  7. Pride and prosperity.
  8. In spirit and truth.
  9. Honor, duty, valor.
  10. We will persevere.

I shall bring these to you every Monday, so you can mull over and adapt if you like .

Or wait till next Monday 🙂

Random Phrases today with Creativity boosters for the day.

Great Sunday.  5th meeting of Toastmasters in 3rd Club of Bangalore. Young, vibrant crowd mixed with some bearded oldies and middle aged Techies.

  1. Love Birds Meaning: A pair of people who have a shared love for each other. No. did not happen. Day of course, began different. 
  2. Jaws of Death Meaning: Being in a dangerous or very deadly situation.  No. Not really. Saw a Premier movie for a while but did not experience it 🙂 
  3. Two Down, One to Go Meaning: Two things have been completed, but there is one more that has yet to be finished. Yes. Today’s short walk left the Udemy course study unfinished for the day .
  4. No Ifs, Ands, or Buts Meaning: Finishing a task without making any excuses. Experienced this later in the day with two Excuse Masters cleverly negotiating with each other. 
  5. Right Off the Bat Meaning: Immediately, done in a hurry; without delay. Yes. without any inhibition responded emails and gave guidance to even a mail marked FYI 🙂 🙂 . Lessons repeated in Communications. 
  6. Break The Ice Meaning: Breaking down a social stiffness.  Great speeches by two youngsters and one International Humorist champs at Toastmasters. The breaking the ice speech was literally great. 
  7. A Chip on Your Shoulder Meaning: Being angry about something that happened in the past. Yes. I still carry one anger chip on my shoulder. 
  8. Shot In the Dark Meaning: An attempt that has little chance for success.  no like hope taking shot in the dark is not part of my strategy. 
  9. Let Her Rip Meaning: Permission to start, or it could mean ‘go faster!’  If the brainfog is gone and wiser sense prevails – you don’t need any permission. 
  10. Wake Up Call Meaning: An occurance of sorts that brings a problem to somebody’s attention and they realize it needs fixing.  Hmmm… will wait and watch though. 
  11. Keep Your Shirt On Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset.  Yes. even while in an angry tone, try not to rant. 🙂

A psychotherapist explains the 5 stages of changing behavior | Ladders

THE WHOLE HUMAN
A psychotherapist explains the 5 stages of changing your behavior
By Katherine Schafler
Aug 17, 2018

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Wait, just thinking about changing is a stage of change? That’s how you start to change — by thinking about it without doing anything?

YES.

The idea that just thinking about what you want to change is an actual stage of change is so rational and obvious after the fact (of course you need to think about what you want to change and how you want to change it before you actually do it), but in the midst of contemplating change most people encounter this sentiment:

All I do is think about changing X and talk about changing X but I don’t actually do it.

This creates stuckness and a negative self-fulfilling prophecy.

You tell yourself over and over again that you’re not someone who does anything to change, you just think about it a ton, and then you become someone who doesn’t do anything to change and who just thinks about it a ton.

Breaking that cycle starts with a deeper understanding of what the process of change actually looks like.

Deliberate change comes in 5 stages:

1. Pre-contemplation
You’re not even thinking about changing. An example of this is a woman who’s dating a man who isn’t great for her, but she’s having fun dating him anyway. She doesn’t think he’s not great for her, she doesn’t think he’s a bad or incompatible choice. She’s just enjoying being around him.

2. Contemplation
In this stage, it’s likely that a few things have happened which have catalyzed some thoughts around whether you should change something. Using the prior example, the woman might have noticed a few things about the man she’s dating that she doesn’t like. She might be starting to ask herself questions like, Where is this going? … What am I doing? … Well he’s really great at X but not so great at Y … Why am I putting up with this? … Is he enough for me? … Am I really happy with this situation?

You don’t actually change anything in the second stage.

You basically just think about what your life would be like if you continued doing the exact same things, what your life would be like if you decided to change and the ways by which that potential change might occur.

3. Preparation
This is when you’ve decided you want to change and you go into preparation mode.

You might ask around about how other people have successfully changed and announce to others that you’ve decided to change in order to hold yourself accountable to it. You might read books or blog posts on change, you might make purchases for yourself that make it easier to enable and stick to the change you want (cough, lululemon, cough).

4. Action
The action stage is marked by actual behavioral changes.

This is the stage that most people associate with change because it’s the stage that’s most visible.

In our example, this is the stage where you have the tough conversation and you break up.

5. Maintenance
A crucial and often overlooked stage.

It can take so long to realize you need to change ‘for real’ as well as to take the actionable steps to change, that by the time you get to the maintenance stage it’s easier to think the tough work is behind you.

NOPE.

Ironically, this is the stage that often requires the most support.

Relapsing (i.e. going back on your decision to change) is usually a natural part of this stage that is misinterpreted as failure.

When you have support through the maintenance stage, you learn to prevent, examine and explore your relapses, mining for the loopholes that you then begin to tie off.

With the exception of pre-contemplation, all the stages of change require a great deal of work, attention, time and energy. Thinking is included in this work. It’s hard to encounter conflicting thoughts about what you want and then reconcile the dissension.

Figuring out what you really, truly want can be challenging enough — implementing and maintaining the changes you’ve decided upon can be even more so. #5 of my ten tenets especially applies here, and if it applies to you, recruit support.

Katherine Schafler is an NYC-based psychotherapist, writer, and speaker.  For more of her work, join her newsletter community, read her blog, or follow her on Instagram.

via A psychotherapist explains the 5 stages of changing behavior | Ladders

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #3

In today’s competitive world, recruiters no longer hold on to traditional methods of recruiting through traditional one-to-one interviews. Thanks to the added competition, which has resulted in a shortage of talent, companies are fast resorting to technology, and platforms like Skype, GoToMeetings are fast replacing the old model of interviewing.

Companies are increasingly adopting employee-centric approaches to working by providing flexi-times, work-from-home initiatives, in addition to many other perks and benefits. Organizations are also getting the option to employ people they want, as compared to the ones who were available to them.

When an organization is located over multiple areas, the big challenge is to connect all the employees located in different offices spread all across the world, to the organization’s vision, identity, and rules – the big picture. That’s where coaching comes in. It is the best way to develop junior talent and provide the skills and expertise to make them experts. Having said that, mentoring provides ample space for a person to retain his individuality and his personal sensibilities.

Note that the goal of mentoring isn’t to create clones. Instead, it is to help people achieve their highest potentialwhile being in sync with the organization’s vision and objectives.

Coaching is not an innate ability; you are not born with the art of coaching. The other misunderstanding that’s often associated with coaching is that it’s related only to sports. Coaching is about pumping people’s spirits, and motivating them. Lack of motivation doesn’t come only in sports. There are times when employees too feel a need for motivation to deliver good results. Coaching helps these employees in holding their own in their team and being a productive group.

Coaching is the method of making people realize the heights they can achieve if only they kept persevering and putting proper effort. Mainly, coaching calls for a change of thinking and approach to a task. It’s about getting the person think positively about his chances of achieving his goal. It includes employee orientation towards the workplace politics, and to assist in removing the barriers to work performance.

Optimal and Optimum

There is a difference between the usages of words optimum and optimal. If a company specifies that they are interested in obtaining optimum results, they mean they want the best output from their employees. On the other hand, if they say they are looking for optimal results, that would mean that they are interested in obtaining the best work out of you in the given circumstances, or working conditions.

There are occasions when the line between optimum and optimal are blurred in coaching. Situations like these arise when an organization starts working on a new project and they need to ram up the office fast with people who are experienced in working on similar projects.

In situations like these, the job of a coach is not only to provide high levels of motivation to employees to excel in their performance, but also to ensure that the employees perform at their peak even if the requisite resources are not always available. It’s about lifting their spirit and keeping it high throughout tough times.

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #2

In today’s competitive business world, there are two basic realities that drive the workforces. First one is getting people who get results. Second is to get people who get results stay.

Today’s world of globalization, customized employee enhancement plans, competitive benefits, and demographic changes make it very tough on companies to get and then retain talent. That’s how the managers of today are not just managers. They are recruiters, planners, motivators, and trainers, all rolled into one.

To keep this already-complex chain of operation from spiraling out of control, the companies have found the best way to manage their staff is to coach them. The role of a coach in a company, in this regard, is to take a group of people with diversified proficiency, understand their strengths and improve them, and at the same time, realize the cause of their weaknesses and eradicate them.

The Role of a Coach

The role of a coach is significantly different from that of an instructor. In coaching, employees are asked to grow in their strengths and address their weaknesses so that they realize their self-growth. It keeps them motivated and happy in the workplace – both keys to retaining talent.

Leaders take their staff from where they are to where they’ve never been before. Nothing could define coaching better than this statement from Henry Kissinger.

Coaching, in the true sense, is tailor-made for people who have the potential to grow to greater heights and yet, are too content in delivering just satisfactory performance. These employees are different from slackers who don’t perform properly, either due to non-interest or inferior knowledge.

The employees we are addressing are employees who like their professional life just the way it is at the moment, and have fit in snugly to the demands of the workplace, which is not bad in itself, however, every organization needs its employees to grow. That’s the way every organization grows too, being a sum total of different talented groups. The job of a coach, therefore, is to ensure that the employees improve their job performance through a constant process of encouraging and suggesting improvements.

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #4. how coaching helps

Abstract: Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees .M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager , something he does not have a lot of experience on . At their first meeting , S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him , just to get acquainted .  In the subsequent meetings , Stanley and Morgan discussed what ‘s strengths and weaknesses were , and what the improvements in skill-sets were that Morgan had to bring back to his job . Over the next few months ,M and S regularly update their progress . They also discuss game play , tactics ,  and team building .

Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees. M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager, something he doesn’t have a lot of experience on. He has been given the task to manage one of the teams in the company, so he sought help from a company coach to help him in understanding the requirements for the job, and to cultivate the right approach for the job. M enrolled for a two day per week course, and was assigned a coach named Stanley, who would be coaching him for the next few months.

S started by asking M to carry a workbook with him, in which M will keep a record of the discussions and guiding points that Stanley will provide to him during the learning. At their first meeting, S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him, just to get acquainted. Then they discussed how they are going to work together, and with other people, in realizing the goals that have been set.

In the subsequent meetings, S and M discussed what M’s strengths and weaknesses were, and what the improvements in skill-sets were that M had to bring in him to excel at his job. Over the next few months, M and S met regularly to understand and analyze their progress.

They also spent time on discussing game play, tactics, and team building. Stanley constantly referred to his old coaching logs and M’s own workbook as evidences of improvement and encouraged Morgan to keep pushing his boundaries. Mock grills and role-plays were organized to check M’s improvement in team-managing under diverse and difficult scenarios.

At the end of the coaching, M commented on how useful he found the coaching process and how it made him realize the potential inside him that he had no idea he possessed. He is now a successful team-manager and a part-time coach himself to the new employees who join the company.

 

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #1

Mentoring is the act of identifying and nurturing potential areas of improvement in an individual. This could be a short-term action plan targeted towards a specific goal in mind, like career growth, higher learning, or could be a life-long process of improvement. The goals and processes are always set here by the learner. The job of the mentor here is to just facilitate, guide, and provide feedback after long stages of intensive observation. Coaching relates primarily to performance improvement, and is more often a short-term achievement in a specific skills area. The goals, process and suggestion are that of the coach. While the learner has primary ownership of the goal, the coach has primary ownership of the process. Feedback is often shared instantaneously.

Audience

This tutorial is for designed primarily for those working professionals who are assigned the responsibility to either coach or mentor the new employees or junior talents in their companies to improve their skill-sets, or help them grow in their careers. This tutorial aims at teaching trainers the difference between coaching and mentoring, and how the approaches change as per the requirement of the learner.

Prerequisites

Before proceeding with this tutorial, you are expected to have a detailed knowledge on the working process of your company, and the job responsibilities that you will handle, and the expectation your management has of you, in terms of productivity and performance.

Thursday Mentor – Free Verse by Jay Parkhe

Greed

Free verse by jay

Because I could not lead for Greed,
it did kindly lead for me.
Pause to lead, like the Greed does.

Pay attention to the selfish,
the selfishness is the most Alchoholic stinginess of all.
Does the selfishness make you shiver?
does it?

Pay attention to the stupid,
stupidity is the most brilliant mistake of all.
Stupids are impressive. stupidity is magnificent,
stupid are vivid, however.

Why would you think egotists are large?
egotists are the most little pride of all.
Are you upset by how smaller they are?
Does it tear you apart to see the egotism so least?

From My fav Newsletter – Ladders. Starbucks Hacks- very interesting.

LIFE

13 Starbucks hacks you need to know

Admit it — you’re low-key obsessed with Starbucks. Starbucks is not just a restaurant — it’s a lifestyle. We wait year round for the infamous PSL (being labeled “basic,” be damned), know it’s time for Christmas when they start serving Gingerbread Lattes from Christmas cups, and look forward to summer with fruity, refreshing, and Insta-worthy iced teas.

But it can be a pretty expensive obsession to have! With typical menu drinks costing about $3-$7, plus whatever add-ins you prefer, it can add up (especially if it’s a daily occurence!). However — it doesn’t have to be that way. It’s worth looking into how to get more bang for our (Star)buck, and how many options the trusty coffee chain and cafe really can offer us. Read on for the hacks that will save you time, money, and calories at Starbucks.

1. Don’t limit yourself to what’s on the menu

In fact, the most expert Starbucks-frequenters rarely order off the menu, to get their favorite drinks and to save money! Check out the secret menu (yes, it really does exist!) or try these secret menu drink concoctions that are all $3, and never pay $5 for a coffee again! If you prefer lattes, order the cafe misto, which tastes the same (half coffee, half milk), but is significantly cheaper (and will save you calories!). More of a tea drinker? A chai latte misto is half steamed milk and half brewed chai tea, saving you money and sugar (you can also just order a hot chai tea with steamed milk if the terminology weirds you out, and save about $2).

2. Make your own drinks for a cheaper price

Iced lattes are one of the most satisfying and refreshing drinks, but can get pricey, especially if you prefer them in Venti size instead of the Tall (don’t we all on Monday mornings?). Instead of ordering a latte, order a triple espresso over ice, in a Venti cup (with room for milk), and then go to the condiments area to fill up your coffee with milk, which makes an iced latte, but for a fraction of the cost. If you prefer your lattes hot, you can also order a Tall coffee with steamed milk (still cheaper than a latte!), or a Tall hot coffee in a Grande cup, and fill up on the milk at the condiments station — a Grande latte for the price of a Tall coffee!

3. Never pay full price for two drinks during the same trip, again

Spend a lot of workdays or meetings at Starbucks where you stay for hours and get multiple drinks? Or maybe just one cup of coffee for you doesn’t cut it? Anytime throughout the day (and in any size — Tall, Grande, or Venti), refill your cup with brewed coffee or tea for just 5o cents. Just know that “refills” only count as iced or hot coffee and iced or hot tea (but remember the tricks above to turn it into a latte!). Also an insider tip: you can get a 50 cent refill with coffee or tea, even if your original drink was not just brewed coffee or tea. So feel free to fill up on a Pumpkin Spice Latte and get a 50 cent extra pick-me-up of tea before you leave!

4. Bring your own cup

Not only will you be saving the planet, one coffee cup and plastic straw at a time, but you’ll also save 10 cents on your drink whenever you bring your own tumbler, cup, or mug. We love using an ever-so-chic mason jar with a lid, or — funny you should mention it — Starbucks has amazing reusable cups of their own. We love this one, this one, and this one.

5. Sign up for Rewards

Normally I detest rewards programs at restaurants and stores — it’s just more spam emails and I probably spend more money than I save (it’s hard to resist a 30% sale or free pastry with purchase of drink). But at Starbucks, it is a must (and with no cons)! First of all, it’s free to sign up (did that convince you enough?), and besides just having a ton of perks for being a reward member (hello, free birthday drink!), you also earn points for a number of things, like purchasing anything in store and certain Starbucks items in grocery stores, that can be used for free food and drinks. Did we mention that it’s free?

6. Don’t buy a water bottle!

Never pay $3 for the plastic water bottle in the Starbucks fridge; just ask for a Venti iced water! You don’t have to worry about the water not being clean — Starbucks triple-filters their water and ice, so you know it’s as clean as possible and you could save some serious money. For an environmentally friendly option, you can also bring your own reusable bottle and ask Starbucks to fill it with water and ice, for free.

7. Order a French Press Pot of coffee

Going with friends or know you’ll want a few cups during your day at Starbucks? Order a French Press pot of coffee instead of individual cups. Each pot serves a few cups of coffee, but will be cheaper than buying each cup individually. Enjoy a pot with your friends, or get a serious caffeine buzz on your own (sometimes, we just need it!).

8. Get the most out of your iced drink

If you’re getting an iced tea, ask for “no water.” Iced teas are typically watered down from the original pitcher into your cup, so asking for no water will make the brew stronger. You can also ask for “light ice” (unless you prefer lots of ice). Ice is usually filled up much more than is necessary to keep the drink cold, limiting the volume of space the barista can fill the cup up with your favorite coffee drink or tea. Having light ice will give you more bang for your buck because you’ll be getting more of your drink, while still keeping it nice and cold.

9. Be specific about your syrup

I love the occasional PSL or Vanilla Latte as much as the next girl, but did you know that a Tall with sweetener has three pumps of syrup, a Grande has four pumps, and a Venti has five or six pumps? Just one pump is about 20 calories and 5 grams of sugar… are you keeping up with this math? That means just a Tall has 15 grams of sugar in the syrup alone. I don’t even want to think about how much is in a Venti! Asking for either one or two pumps per drink still gives the same flavor (we need that pumpkin spice!!) and sweetens up your drink, but if you order a Grande Vanilla Latte with two pumps vanilla syrup, you’d be saving 40 calories and 10 grams of sugar, for not much difference in taste.

10. Ask for a sample so you never get a drink you dislike again!

I don’t know about you, but I usually stick to the usual iced coffee, just so I don’t risk getting a drink that I end up not liking. But oh the possibilities out there in the Starbucks universe! Unless the store is super busy, the barista should be totally fine getting you a sample of a certain brew or drink, if you’re unsure whether or not you’d like it.

11. Know all the sizes

Thought “Tall” was the smallest? Think again — “Short” is an 8oz size (“Tall” is 12oz), which clarifies that age-old confusion that “Tall” was the smallest size, when it counterintuitively sounds like the largest — it’s because “Short” is the size smaller. Clears up a lot, doesn’t it? If you’re in the mood for a small drink, Short is cheaper than a Tall. The “Short” cappuccino has the same amount of espresso as the “Tall,” so if caffeine is your goal, opt for the cheaper options.

12. Are you and a friend both getting a Frappucino? Get one Venti!

A Venti size of your favorite sweet iced drink is about 24oz, while a Tall is 12oz. However, a Venti frappe is significantly cheaper than two Tall frappes would be (about $4 less, precisely). So instead of getting two, order the Venti size and ask for two Tall cups. Divide accordingly, and enjoy your frappucino with your friend, knowing you both saved money.

13. No time to wait in line? Order through your cell phone!

Using the Starbucks Mobile app, you can order ahead of time, and just go pick it up. No more waiting in long lines for your coffee! We’re busy women — we have much more important things to do.

This article was originally published on The Everygirl.com.

Replugged: My article about 11 Mentoring approaches of Jay Parkhe

We are all a One Man Company. Jay is A Complete FootBall/ Cricket/ Hockey Team Rolled into one as an Accomplished Mentor

  1. Jay is a Coach. ( For Executives / StartPreneura / Businessman/Woman):

When you need to have older, wiser person around, who is better attuned to your industry and job, Jay can coach you through tough moments, think big picture on projects and ideas, and helps Mentees solve work-related problems. Coach is required when you need someone to help you think-through difficult problems. A good coach doesn’t solve problems; they help you see both the problem and your role clearly. They do this by observing, listening, asking focused questions, reflecting back, and challenging. Coaches can suggest strategies for solving problems you may not have considered, and can help you think “bigger picture” on ideas and possible solutions.

  1. Jay is a Connector – All Mentees need this.

There is an old saying, “It’s all about who you know?” Well, it’s who you know — along with who they know, and to whom they are willing to introduce you. Jay willingly opens up his network to help move an entrepreneur and his or her business forward. Whether it’s staking his own credibility on helping find a first customer who’s willing to take a risk on the unproven entity, or making that connection to a critical hire, Connector Jay is one of the most valuable mentoring assets a startup can have. People are generally inward looking. Connector Jay is outward-facing (makes you do a short exercise with your thumbs too which is his trademark style). Jay’s satisfaction comes from helping people meet each other. Jay has met a half dozen true connectors in life and without them, he would not have had as much success. Nobody knows why Jay loves connecting people, but this sharing traits comes from having bountiful amounts of energy and loving new ideas. Jay is a networker for 15 years of Social Media and has a wide and very deep network of people who all respect me and they often «get things done.» If you meet one of these people, hang on. (He may be prove to be your GodFather moment! 🙂

Jay is also an expert on Social media, Blogging and Networking and has spent 15 years in self-learning. He offers valuable tips, technology help, productivity support thru web tools he has tested over the years.

  1. Jay is a Challenger – For StartPreneurs, Business People, Social Enterprises.

Jay is not a mentor you’ll be spending New Year’s Eve with because he is there to call bullsh– on a lot of things that will sometimes make you uncomfortable. But that’s OK. If you want lots of happy talk, call your Mom. She will love everything you do. If you want to grow, you will want some challengers in your life who will tell you when they think you’re doing something wrong or if an idea just plain *****. They’re the ones who, after you call the Cheerleader about your great idea, will tell you a dozen ways why it won’t work unless you do X, Y, and Z. This criticism, if it comes from the right place, will set you on the right path. Challenger Jay is super smart and super fast–:) he often doesn’t have a lot of time so you’ll find he’ll give his dose of advice quickly and move on. Call on Jay only when you need him. He is not an ATM – Any Time Mentor! An entrepreneur’s drive needs to come from within, but many of us also need a healthy push to heighten our sense of passion and urgency and keep us moving forward. The Challenger’s role is to push an entrepreneur to put in the hard work, to sweat the details that matter, to hit key milestones and to outwork his/her competition. It’s also The Challenger’s responsibility to confront assumptions and ask the tough questions that ultimately prevent an entrepreneur from making costly errors.

  1. Jay is a Cheerleader – Executives, StarUps, Businesses.

You remember the people whom you can call after getting a big promotion and they will be as thrilled for you as your mother. And believe me, nobody will ever be as thrilled as Mom. In a cutthroat world, you need people who will genuinely be happy for you and who will be there when everyone else has left–i.e., after your company has gone bankrupt. Jay is one person like this who will sends encouraging texts or takes calls immediately if you are having a particularly bad day. Sometimes that’s all you need to get you through. You don’t need too many people like this–sometimes one is just enough, but this person is your rock.

Cheerleader Jay can give an entrepreneur the motivation and energy needed to persevere. That energy is also found in a supportive spouse, parent or in good friends, but it really helps to have someone with relevant experience and credibility say, “You can do this.”

5.Jay is an Educator – An Advisor for Business People

Jay was a Visiting B School Faculty for 15 years and and Advisor to Two New Educational Institutes and three Skills Development companies. As an Educator: Starting a business is the steepest learning curve anyone can experience. The tests of building a business are frequent — and lessons are ongoing. Educator is someone who sees in an entrepreneur a desire to learn and is willing to sit down and teach him/her when needed. From business basics to complex ideas and practices, they’ll take the time to understand knowledge gaps and help entrepreneurs avoid the costly mistakes that can be caused by being too proud to ask for help or advice. Educator is a person who takes the time to sit down and share their expertise with those who want to learn. Educators love to help others by sharing their wisdom. They want to see everyone succeed!

  1. Jay is an Ideator – StartUp, Running Businesses, C-Level Executive Coach

Jay is a Creative Thinker, Critical Thinker, Lateral Thinker and also an Elastic Thinker = The Ideator Jay asks you Are you dreaming big enough? Are you being as creative as you can be? When an entrepreneur is buried in executing day-to-day tasks and sweating the small stuff in the trenches, taking the time to pause and survey the bigger picture is critical for keeping a business moving in the right direction. The Ideator loves to play the role of thought partner which Jay calls as Accountability Partner a term he borrows from his Mentor and Coach Dr. Marshall Goldsmith as an entrepreneur thinks critically about how to build a creative and differentiated business

  1. Jay the Librarian – Executives, StartUps, Businesses,

Jay is a powerhouse of knowledge and experience. He is a walking encyclopedia on subjects he likes and has invested his time to learn more, informally. As you navigate through life, it’s helpful to be able to pull from various resources to help you get along. The Librarian has a wealth of information on your community, clubs, organizations and support systems. They know a resource for almost any need and are aware of where to go to get questions answered or to get things done.

8.Jay the Super Star and Idol to many of his Mentees – Executives, StartUps

We need to find people who we admire. People who are living parts of ourf life in a way you aspire to, or who currently have the career that you want to have. Spend time with them and get to know their routines, their resources, how they go about their days. While their way is not the only way, you can gain valuable insight into steps you might want to take to get you closer to your goals!

9.Jay can be your Teammate – Executives, StartUps, Businesses

Some days you just need an awesome listener. Someone to remind you that it’s okay; tomorrow is another day. A good teammate realizes that you aren’t always looking for a solution to your problem, or a motivational speech to spur you on. You just need someone to listen with a sympathetic ear, and then allow you to move on.

  1. Jay is a small brand – Startups and Businesses. Social enterprises.

with image, reputation and following – I support your Brand Story development by sharing my successes and failures transparently and helping you find your own answers in moments of Crisis. Jay helps entrepreneurs Dream Big – Define their Vision, Set their Mission, Goals, Objectives, Action Plans by working on a Long and Mid Term Strategy for their businesses. He then helps them to begin execution by drawing up a Project Management dummy set up with timelines, deadlines, Reviews, course correction etc.

Not all Jay’s mentees need his Entire gamut of skills. They sometimes pick and choose specific ones to save time, energy and effort or duplication.

  1. Jay is a Non-Playing Captain, Coach and Mentor

Jay takes an impassionate, detached, cold look at the business as it passes thru its crisis, turnaround, loss making phases and offers to work with the team to find solutions by brainstorming, creative thinking technique. His methods are unique, they do stand the test of time eventhough they may not have been tested in your industry.

Tuesday Mentor : How many ‘Formulas’ and Ópen Secrets’ of SUCCESS will keep producing Bestsellers? Jay Parkhe

Formula For YOUR Success!

While everyone who seems to come up with SUCCESS, FORMULA, SECRET in their titles makes to the best seller list of books – rarely one formula is good for Home businesses or Startpreneurs.

Summary:

Outline your tasks daily using the day timer you will know what day and time you can repost your ads or emails to Safelists. This is a great time saver. If you have multiple email accounts a program called GMAIL Aps is tops, login one place and check them all at once. A lot times for every task to get the most important done early

Keywords:

<a href=”http://parkhe.com”>{anchors}</a>,<a href=”http://parkhe.com”>{anchors}</a>

Finding your niche so you can concentrate. When you find out what your specialty is then you can start to promote to the people that are working on the same type of things you are. Are you just with a program to make money as an affiliate? Do you have your own website that goes back to your affiliate site?

Are you selling homemade products?

Are you someone that is selling from his/her own store or mall?

There are so many different things to promote and you want to reach your target audience to get the results that you are seeking.

Outline your tasks daily using the day timer you will know what day and time you can repost your ads or emails to Safelists. This is a great time saver. If you have multiple email accounts a program called GMAIL Apps is tops, login one place and check them all at once. A lot times for every task to get the most important done early when you are full of energy. Take breaks so you can re-evaluate what you are doing and be more receptive to tasks still to be done. Organization will set you above the crowd because you will accomplish more.

Reach your crowd after finding your niche you need to advertise to your target. Go to forums and post to the ones that fit your niche so you will be working your ads to people with the same goals and targets you have. In the forums you will not be able to blatantly set your ads out, post what you would like to add and then leave your signature with your URL in it. If they enjoyed or learned from your post they might want to follow up by visiting your site.

Mentors get you trained and help stimulate the learning process. They keep you fortified with uplifting values and appeal to your excitement. With the right mentor you will go farther because you are learning from them, this shortens your learning curve. When you work with others listen and you will gain information from them from what they have been doing in their promotion.

Using every avenue of promotion, traffic exchanges also use banner views for your credits. They have blog exchanges, you view others blogs to get traffic to your blog. They also have banner rotators you can post one url in the banner slot with 5 banners loaded to cycle through. Just a few of the ways to make your time work better with tools online. Before you purchase any software online check out and see what other people have to say about it at Google. This is a way to find out before you have put out your money for software that will

not be used. Market wisely and then you will be in the profit zone.

Leave nothing to chance, ad trackers help you to find which promotion is working for you. This also depends on titles and content when this has been checked and it still does not pull people in, then leave the non-producers behind and find new ones. Traffic Hoopla has the top promoters listed every week; this is a good resource to check. This one costs but still a good resource- Traffic Testers.

Advertise, and advertise some more, you just have to get the word out. Even the big names put their logos and advertising out there for millions of dollars. You can start with the free ones and after making money move on and put your money out for paid advertising. Keep your records so you know what you are spending and what is bringing the people to your site.

9 stupid rules that make great people quit | Ladders

via 9 stupid rules that make great people quit | Ladders

Jay’s Mentor Wisdom Quotes

MENTOR Humor (don’t these sound familiar to some famous Quotes?

  1. Progress does not happen without change, and change doesn’t happen without an open mind. – Jay Parkhe

  2. When no one challenges your ideas; it is even more important to closely evaluate them. – Jay Parkhe

  3. You can’t discover new places if you never leave the comfort of your home. – Jay Parkhe

  4. The more you like yourself, and the less you’re likely to be like others and THAT makes you truly unique. Jay Parkhe

  5. GIVE it Everything You’ve Got, even in you smallest steps and you’ll be on the path to success, surely and certainly – Jay Parkhe

From my respected Mentor – Dr. Marshall Goldsmith

In this week’s interview with Chris Cuomo, my great friend, journalist and news anchor of CNN’s Cuomo Prime Time interviews me about one of the trickiest bad habits in my book, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There.
I hope you enjoy and learn as Chris and I explore the concept of “adding too much value”.
For more articles and videos, check out all of my posts on LinkedIn!
Is It Worth It?
Is It Worth It?
Chris Cuomo, journalist and news anchor on CNN’s Cuomo Prime Time, recently interviewed me about one of the trickiest bad habits in my book, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, adding too much value. We explore the concept in the short excerpt from our interview below. Chris: Chris Cuomo here with the … Continue reading Is It Worth It to Add Value? Not Always.…»

All of these videos are online, so if you haven’t had a chance to see one yet or if you’d like a refresher they are available at Thinkers50. I hope you find these videos to be fun and useful and that you continue to share them!

Life is good.
Marshall

About the Marshall Goldsmith Thinkers50 Video Blog

The Marshall Goldsmith Thinkers50 Video Blog and accompanying written articles incorporate learnings from my 38 years of experience with top executives, as well as material from my previous research, articles, and books, including What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, MOJO, Coaching for Leadership, and my new book, New York Times and Wall Street Journal best-selling Triggers.

How to be happier? Try a “rougher” schedule | Big Think

via How to be happier? Try a “rougher” schedule | Big Think

Random Acts of Kindness – Choose one. I have.

  1. Remember to turn the lights off when you leave a room!
  2. Make your voice count – sign a petition for a good cause
  3. Support a small, local business as a customer
  4. It’s hard to stay connected – reach out to an elderly person you know
  5. Visit a friend who’s sick
  6. Hug your parents
  7. Compliment someone today!
  8. Start the day right – make breakfast for everyone
  9. Send a thank you card to someone who has made a difference in your life (a friend, family member, teacher etc.)
  10. Leave a kind message anywhere (in a library book, on a computer etc.)

Creativity: Random Inputs generated this morning for today

Quick and Dirty

Meaning:

Things that are fixed with great speed, but as a result, it’s probably not going to work very well.  The quick trip this year did not expect any result even after a month and I was little depressed.  But the Brainwave and Udemy courses I am doing are really balancing.

There’s No I in Team

Meaning:

To not work alone, but rather, together with others in order to achieve a certain goal.  The recent attempts to work as a team member without putting skin in the game has not worked.  Partner trouble of the past always comes back however much I try to let it go.

Burst Your Bubble

Meaning:

To ruin someone’s happy moment.  No I did not and will not do that.

Break The Ice

Meaning:

Breaking down a social stiffness. Hmmm… I think I shall shrink all other social activities and whatever is going on and just focus on 2 or 3 major big ticket items only.  I need finishiative myself.

Right Off the Bat

Meaning:

Immediately, done in a hurry; without delay. But it did not yield any results. May be the introduction was not done well or my offerings were wrong or may be I was not seen as the choice or I failed to sell my services well.

I Smell a Rat

Meaning:

A feeling that something is not quite right, or awry.  That sinking feeling ! Ahh !  but I am learning lessons on Self hypnosis and they are good. They work.

It’s Not Brain Surgery

Meaning:

A task that’s easy to accomplish, a thing lacking complexity.  No. I do not have any simple task in my task list. I must just junk it and fill it up with small simple tasks and steps I can do and applaud myself , pat my own back.

 

Bully – A Didactic Cinquain

Bully – A Didactic Cinquain

by jay

Bully

Snappy, Chiding

Joking, funloving, KickAss Humor

Ever so recidivist

Tor-Mentor

Adieu – Free Verse by Jay – Dhananjay Parkhe

In a Mentor’s life, Mentees come for:
1. A Reason
2. A Season,
3. Or for life and accept him/ her as Life Coach.
After a longish Five and half month I bid adieu to a worthy mentoree finally today.

Adieu
Free verse by Jay
(On Cloud Nine:Meaning: Having strong feelings of happiness or satisfaction. )
Congratulations, however hard you try,
I Will always Praise.
Do congratulations make you shiver?
do they?

The communion that’s really anathema,
Above all others are the serenades.
Do serenades make you shiver?
do they?

All that is little is not hello,
hello, by all account is big.
Down, down, down into the darkness of the hello,
Gently it goes – the liberal, the high, mighty fellow.

Adieu is faces of death music.
faces of death music is Adieu.
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”.
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”,
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”.
Adieu

Creativity: Random phrases generated for the day.

  1. Down For The Count Meaning: Someone or something that looks to be defeated, or nearly so. – No I would like to see WIN WIN for all I deal with.
  2. Back To the Drawing Board Meaning: Starting over again on a new design from a previously failed attempt. Yes. I did not get to my target of weight loss as 31st July deadline ended. Need to go back again to drawing board. SEt new date, do something different. Something more. something less. Growth has occured. Now time to shrink.
  3. Cry Wolf Meaning: Someone that calls for help when it is not needed. Someone who is lying. Hmmm. No comment
  4. A Dime a Dozen Meaning: Something that is extremely common. Yes Random, mundane people who I try to make them do extra so they turn Extraordinary.
  5. Cut To The Chase Meaning: To get to the point, leaving out all of the unnecessary details. I like this. Always hit the nail on the head.
  6. Keep On Truckin’ Meaning: To keep going, pressing forward; never stopping. Yes that’s who I am. A Trucker 1
  7. Right Off the Bat Meaning: Immediately, done in a hurry; without delay. Call it impulse, or whatever, I call it quick finishiative.
  8. Wouldn’t Harm a Fly Meaning: Nonviolent; someone who is mild or gentle. Hmmms…
  9. Fish Out Of Water Meaning: Someone being in a situation that they are unfamiliar or unsuited for. I follow WEan to WIN strategy in my coaching/ mentoring and couldn’t care more
  10. Playing Possum Meaning: Pretending to be dead, or to be deceitful about something. I hate pretenders, hypocrites, pseudos and make it known from the rooftop!.

Creativity: Random Phrase generator for the day and how I foresee the day to progress…

  1. Birds of a Feather Flock Together Meaning: People tend to associate with others who share similar interests or values. Have to find more and more likeminded people going forward that people poles apart.

  • Rain on Your Parade Meaning: To spoil someone’s fun or plans; ruining a pleasurable moment. No. Not happening. Won’t do that.

  • Hit Below The Belt Meaning: A boxing term. Also often used to refer to inappropriate words, or comments that are too personal. NEVER.

  • Poke Fun At Meaning: Making fun of something or someone; ridicule. Not happening, I am in a learning mode. Learnt a bit of self=hypnosis on Udemy and will try and find internal peace. have a Heavy head though 🙂

  • Quality Time Meaning: Spending time with another to strengthen the relationship. Yes meeitng coming up. started a new startup too.

  • Fool’s Gold Meaning: Iron pyrities is a worthless mineral that resembles gold. May write another poem today on this topic.

  • Tug of War Meaning: It can refer to the popular rope pulling game or it can mean a struggle for authority. Have no tug of war situation except one tough pricing negotiation coming up tomorrow..

  • Curiosity Killed The Cat Meaning: Typically said to indicate that any further investigation into a situation may lead to harm. I think enroling in 58 couses on Udemy is ENOUGH !

  • Throw In the Towel Meaning: Giving up; to surrender. No. Never. Not happening.

  • Eat My HatMeaning: Having confidence in a specific outcome; being almost sure about something. Yess. Will begin teaching SCM Logistics course again and take up paid coaching/ mentoring assignments for Branding/ Hyperscaling of startups.

Creativity: Random Phrases generated for the day, predict the day ahead.

  1. Wake Up Call Meaning: An occurance of sorts that brings a problem to somebody’s attention and they realize it needs fixing.  Just wondering, how many wake up calls one needs? One per day?  For those day dreaming? Multiple times a day:) 
  2. Like Father Like Son Meaning: Resembling one’s parents in terms of appearance or behavior. Hmmm…. Appearance is OK. Behavior – may be not! 🙂
  3. In the Red Meaning: Losing money. Being in debt.  But the people in Red so get habituated of high living and dependence on others money – they seldom come down from their high horses. 
  4. A Chip on Your Shoulder Meaning: Being angry about something that happened in the past. Yes. It happens to me all the time. Difficult to let go of the past. 
  5. Mouth-watering Meaning: Delicious; something that looks or tastes appetizing.
  6. Foaming At The Mouth Meaning: To be enraged and show it.  Ha Ha ha – I do it without foaming at the mouth – I type! 
  7. Cry Wolf Meaning: Someone that calls for help when it is not needed. Someone who is lying.  Hmmm… many recent cases of false alarms responded – leading to waste of time and going into a spin unnecessarily. 
  8. Easy As Pie Meaning: Something that is easy.  Nothing is? Is there anything easy at all?
  9. Tough It Out Meaning: To remain resillient even in hard times; enduring. Tough minded optimision, grit, determination and a firm commitment – yes, that’s what it is for me. 

Creativity: Random Phrase generated this morning and how day is ending…

  1. Money Doesn’t Grow On Trees Meaning: Suggests that money is a resource that must be earned and is not one that’s easily acquired. I sometimes wonder how deep the negotiations go into cutting into teacher’s courses. I found it absurd when the negotiator of an educational institute was so unreasonable – he was happy if I said I will teach ProBono 🙂 I said NO! 
  2. Give a Man a Fish Meaning: It’s better to teach a person how to do something than to do that something for them.  I TOTALLY agree after this year’s lessons I learnt. Doing things for free, offering free advice has no Value. People like PRICE these days and are mostly unwilling to pay or negotiate hard for a ProBono bargain. The attitudes are so horrific. 
  3. What Am I, Chopped Liver? Meaning: A rhetorical question used by a person who feels they are being given less consideration than someone else. Playing Victim, playing damsel in distress like ( even guys do this 🙂  ) is characteristic of some Millennials I have dealt with in the recent past. 
  4. On the Same Page Meaning: Thinking alike or understanding something in a similar way with others. Rare to find agreements and I like to push forward with even a few agreements. 
  5. Poke Fun At Meaning: Making fun of something or someone; ridicule.  Is this second nature in marathi families ?  We love to poke fun, pun, pull legs so much that when we do this to others who come close  – it demagnetises and repulses them. 
  6. Off One’s Base Meaning: A person that is crazy or behaving in idiotic ways.  Body language, facial gestures, awkward neck and eye movements all depict disinterest – why don’t people be cogent enough to say it on the face. 
  7. When the Rubber Hits the Road Meaning: When something is about to begin, get serious, or put to the test. The real tests hopefully start for a new Revenue making stint next month onwards. 
  8. Yada Yada Meaning: A way to notify a person that what they’re saying is predictable or boring.  Wonderful expression. I like it. 🙂
  9. Keep Your Shirt On Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset. What I have come across this year mostly are those who offer their shirts when they are REALLY naked. 
  10. Down For The Count Meaning: Someone or something that looks to be defeated, or nearly so.  Hmmm… That’s not me ! Never.  🙂

These are the 10 habits of unlikeable people | Ladders. I CONFESS. I have them too.

via These are the 10 habits of unlikeable people | Ladders

No one is perfect. But that’s a very lame excuse! No? I read this article and said. Oh, Gosh! I have the same habits which surface at wrong times.  Interesting article for deeper personal introspection and improvement.  LIked and shared.

 

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THE WHOLE HUMAN

10 habits of unlikeable people

Too many people succumb to the mistaken belief that being likeable comes from natural, unteachable traits that belong only to a lucky few — the good looking, the fiercely social, and the incredibly talented. It’s easy to fall prey to this misconception. In reality, being likeable is under your control, and it’s a matter of emotional intelligence (EQ).

In a study conducted at UCLA, subjects rated over 500 descriptions of people based on their perceived significance to likeability. The top-rated descriptors had nothing to do with being gregarious, intelligent, or attractive (innate characteristics). Instead, the top descriptors were sincerity, transparency, and capable of understanding (another person).

These adjectives, and others like them, describe people who are skilled in the social side of emotional intelligence. TalentSmartresearch data from more than a million people shows that people who possess these skills aren’t just highly likeable; they outperform those who don’t by a large margin.


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Likeability is so critical to your success at work that it can completely alter your performance. A University of Massachusetts study found that managers were willing to accept an auditor’s argument with no supporting evidence if he or she was likeable, and Jack Zenger found that just 1 in 2,000 unlikeable leaders were considered effective by their colleagues.

Being likeable is as much about avoiding behaviors that decrease your likeability as it is about magnifying those that increase it. To help you with this, I did some digging to uncover the key behaviors that hold people back when it comes to likeability. Make certain these behaviors don’t catch you by surprise.

Name-dropping

It’s great to know important and interesting people, but using every conversation as an opportunity to name-drop is pretentious and silly. Just like humble-bragging, people see right through it. Instead of making you look interesting, it makes people feel as though you’re insecure and overly concerned with having them like you. It also cheapens what you have to offer. When you connect everything you know with whoyou know (instead of what you know or what you think), conversations lose their color.

People are averse to those who are desperate for attention. Simply being friendly and considerate is all you need to win people over. When you speak in a friendly, confident, and concise manner, people are much more attentive and persuadable than if you try to show them that you’re important. People catch on to your attitude quickly and are more attracted to the right attitude than who you know.

Emotional hijackings

My company provides 360° feedback assessments, and we come across far too many instances of people throwing things, screaming, making people cry, and other telltale signs of an emotional hijacking. An emotional hijacking demonstrates low emotional intelligence. As soon as you show that level of instability, people will question whether or not you’re trustworthy and capable of keeping it together when it counts.

Exploding at anyone, regardless of how much they might “deserve it,” turns a huge amount of negative attention your way. You’ll be labeled as unstable, unapproachable, and intimidating. Controlling your emotions keeps you in the driver’s seat. When you’re able to control your emotions around someone who wrongs you, they end up looking bad instead of you.

Humble-bragging

We all know those people who like to brag about themselves behind the mask of self-deprecation. For example, the gal who makes fun of herself for being a nerd when she really wants to draw attention to the fact that she’s smart or the guy who makes fun of himself for having a strict diet when he really wants you to know how healthy and fit he is. While many people think that self-deprecation masks their bragging, everyone sees right through it. This makes the bragging all the more frustrating, because it isn’t just bragging; it’s also an attempt to deceive.

Whipping out your phone

Nothing turns someone off to you like a mid-conversation text message or even a quick glance at your phone. When you commit to a conversation, focus all of your energy on the conversation. You’ll find that conversations are more enjoyable and effective when you immerse yourself in them.

Having a closed mind

If you want to be likeable, you must be open-minded, which makes you approachable and interesting to others. No one wants to have a conversation with someone who has already formed an opinion and is unwilling to listen. Having an open mind is crucial in the workplace, where approachability means access to new ideas and help. To eliminate preconceived notions and judgment, you need to see the world through other people’s eyes. This doesn’t require that you believe what they believe or condone their behavior; it simply means that you quit passing judgment long enough to truly understand what makes them tick.

Not asking enough questions

The biggest mistake people make in conversation is being so focused on what they’re going to say next or how what the other person is saying is going to affect them that they fail to hear what’s being said. The words come through loud and clear, but the meaning is lost. A simple way to avoid this is to ask a lot of questions. People like to know you’re listening, and something as simple as a clarification question shows that not only are you listening but that you also care about what they’re saying. You’ll be surprised how much respect and appreciation you gain just by asking questions.

Being too serious

People gravitate toward those who are passionate. That said, it’s easy for passionate people to come across as too serious or uninterested, because they tend to get absorbed in their work. Likeable people balance their passion for their work with their ability to have fun. At work they are serious, yet friendly. They still get things done because they are socially effective in short amounts of time and they capitalize on valuable social moments. They focus on having meaningful interactions with their coworkers, remembering what people said to them yesterday or last week, which shows people that they are just as important to them as their work is.

Gossiping

People make themselves look terrible when they get carried away with gossiping. Wallowing in talk of other people’s misdeeds or misfortunes may end up hurting their feelings if the gossip ever finds its way to them, but gossiping is guaranteed to make you look negative and spiteful every time.

Sharing too much, too early

While getting to know people requires a healthy amount of sharing, sharing too much about yourself right off the bat comes across wrong. Be careful to avoid sharing personal problems and confessions too quickly. Likeable people let the other person guide them as to when it’s the right time for them to open up. Over-sharing comes across as self-obsessed and insensitive to the balance of the conversation. Think of it this way: if you’re getting into the nitty gritty of your life without learning about the other person first, you’re sending the message that you see them as nothing more than a sounding board for your problems.

Sharing too much on social media

Studies have shown that people who over-share on social media do so because they crave acceptance, but the Pew Research Center has revealed that this over-sharing works against them by making people dislike them. Sharing on social media can be an important mode of expression, but it needs to be done thoughtfully and with some self-control. Letting everyone know what you ate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner along with how many times you walked your dog today will do much more harm than good when it comes to likeability.

Bringing it all together

When you build your awareness of how your actions are received by other people, you pave the way to becoming more likeable.

 

 

Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor | Ladders

via Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor | Ladders

 

MENTORSHIPS

Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor

Will you be my mentor?

This question makes me cringe. It’s not that I don’t want to help. I do — I really do. It’s just that when someone asks me to be their mentor, I don’t know what I’m signing up for. The question feels like a marriage proposal from someone I’ve never met, an indefinite labor contract with unspecified terms of service, and a giant pile of responsibility on an already full plate.

But I understand where people are coming from. We’ve been spoon-fed the idea that finding a mentor is a prerequisite for success. Countless business books and self-help guides preach the importance of a good mentor. Under this image we have nurtured, a mentor takes a mentee under their wing, like Socrates and Plato, Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg, and Mr. Miyagi and Daniel. The relationship then blossoms, and the mentee achieves philosophical greatness, makes billions, or wins the All Valley Karate Championship.

I hate to be a buzzkill, but this isn’t how things work in real life. We wait for a good mentor to arrive like a prophet, whisk us from our canyon of despair, and push us up the ladder of success. But that mentor often doesn’t come, at least not in the form that we’re expecting. We then use the lack of a mentor as an excuse for not getting started.

The solution to this quandary appears in a scene in Good Will Hunting, one of my favorite movies. In the scene, Sean McGuire, the therapist played by Robin Williams, asks Matt Damon’s genius character, Will Hunting, if he has a soulmate—someone who challenges him.

After some meandering, Will replies: “I got plenty. Shakespeare, Nietzsche, Frost, O’Connor, Kant, Pope, Locke.” Sean mocks this answer: “That’s great. They’re all dead.” Undeterred, Will says: “Not to me, they’re not.”

Will is on to something. We assume our soulmates and sources of inspiration have to be real-life mentors who are a quick phone call or an email away. But that assumption is false. As Elizabeth Gilbert writes, mentors “live on the shelves of your library; they live on the walls of museums; they live in recordings made decades ago.”

No one has taught me more about democracy than the Czech writer and politician Vaclav Havel. He’s not alive. No one has taught me more about writing than Stephen King. I’ve never met him. No one has taught me more about humility than the Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius. He’s been fertilizing daffodils for nearly two thousand years. No one has inspired me more about leveraging failure for success than Sara Blakely. I saw her on the television show Billions once, but our paths have never crossed.

All I had to do to learn from these incredible people, and many others like them, was to study their lives. Take, for example, Stephen King. I treat his fiction like a textbook. I highlight, underline, circle, and review. I’ve learned more from studying his writing than I ever could from a formal “mentoring” session where I would ask him if he has any advice on writing (to which he would probably respond, “Go read my books.”).

You can channel the power of these teachers without holding a seance. Pick your favorite source of inspiration and ask yourself this question: What would they do if they were in my shoes? What would Elon Musk do when faced with this challenge? How would Elizabeth Gilbert tackle this creativity problem? How would Jane Austen develop the character in my novel? If you’ve done your homework, and studied their works, you’ll know what the answer is.

So, to those of you looking for real-life mentors, I say, stop looking.

Your mentors are already all around you.

You just have to open your eyes to see them.

Ozan Varol is a rocket scientist turned law professor and bestselling author. Click here to download a free copy of his e-book, The Contrarian Handbook: 8 Principles for Innovating Your Thinking. Along with your free e-book, you’ll get the Weekly Contrarian — a newsletter that challenges conventional wisdom and changes the way we look at the world (plus access to exclusive content for subscribers only).

This article first appeared on OzanVarol.com.

Random phrases generated for creative juices to flow:)

  1. Shot In the Dark Meaning: An attempt that has little chance for success. But worth taking. I don’t leave till the end, whenever it comes – it may or may not come. Keep at it. 
  2. Birds of a Feather Flock Together Meaning: People tend to associate with others who share similar interests or values. Yes. Especially Conniving, Nefarious, Nexus of Corrupt always find ways to come together. 
  3. On the Ropes Meaning: Being in a situation that looks to be hopeless! Hmmm… In such cases, I do not persist. I take a walk. A childhood trait.  Whenever there was an issue about Captaincy and someone wanted to be one instead of me – I’d walk away and start a new club, a new team and remain the Captain. What an authoritarian, autocrat I was. No?
  4. Down And Out Meaning: (1) A term used in a boxing. (2) Someone who has become incapacitated.  No. Never. Never give up.  I was able to contain the heart disease with Doctors, family help and my own determination.  I still live with half a heart pumping at only 35% but I choose to live and not give up.
  5. Hear, Hear Meaning: A shout of agreement, or to draw attention to a speaker.  No many times do we hear this.  These days, like the purchase managers of the olden days, people are taught to say NO NO NO NO till their tongue bleeds. 🙂

Creativity and Random phrases for today.

  1. Roll With the Punches Meaning: To tolerate or endure through the unexpected mishappenings you may encounter from time to time.  Yes. As an ex Boxer I am ready to face them. 
  2. Back To the Drawing Board Meaning: Starting over again on a new design from a previously failed attempt. Starting to publish the Poetry ebook from my blog tomorrow is the deadline. How I hate deadlines. 
  3. Jack of All Trades Master of None Meaning: Having suitable skill in multiple things, but not being an expert in any of them.  Yes I am one. No problem with that. 
  4. Rain on Your Parade Meaning: To spoil someone’s fun or plans; ruining a pleasurable moment.  Happened this morning and suggested solutions to overcome the issues and mitigate risks. 
  5. Hear, Hear Meaning: A shout of agreement, or to draw attention to a speaker. Yet to happen. 
  6. I Smell a Rat Meaning: A feeling that something is not quite right, or awry. That sinking feeling… Why does it always occur on my bad biorhythm days?

I liked this parable : Mathew 13

The Parable of the Sower (sometimes called the Parable of the Soils) is a parable of Jesusfound in the three Synoptic Gospels in Matthew 13:1-23, Mark 4:1-20, and Luke 8:4-15.

In the story, a sower sows seed and does so indiscriminately. Some seed falls on the path (wayside) with no soil, some on rocky ground with little soil, and some on soil which contained thorns. In these cases the seed is taken away or fails to produce a crop, but when it falls on good soil it grows, yielding thirty, sixty, or a hundredfold.

Jesus then (only in the presence of his disciples) explains that the seed represents the Gospel (the sower being anyone who proclaims it), and the various soils represent people’s responses to it (the first three representing rejection while the last represents acceptance.

I’m a gardener Mentor. I try and die the seeds to make Dreams grow into ambitions, translating into Vision, mission, goals, objectives, action plans, biz, marketing plans etal.

In my efforts, sometimes I come across very distressed mentees. I have to work on making the soil good as they have rocky soil of past bad experiences, thorny soil which does not allow seeds to germinate, or find soil. I spend 5, 13, 26, 52 weeks depending upon the STATE, and SITUATION.

I Sometimes come across Sand, silt or clay land or simply rocky land. Rarely I find delta land ( usualy in C Suite execs) which is fertile . Each gets a different mentor treatment.

It works. There are failures too. As the mentorees stop responding and throw seeds on footpath – it is eaten by birds and pigeons.

In one case, after sowing 150 revenue ideas and rigorously, tilling the land I found failure. I decided to move on. As the farmer/ mentoree just did not understand and allowed my gardening efforts fail.

Sad but true! It happens.

Gardener then moves on too…

The Mentor and the MonaLisa Rhyming Couplet Ideas -Ver 1.0 by Jay

The Mentor and the MonaLisa

Rhyming Couplet Ideas by Jay

See the snuffing of the Mentor,
I think he’s angry at the core.

He finds it hard to see the accidental,
Overshadowed by the brainy rental.

Who is that practicing near the coat?
I think she’d like to eat the goat.

She is but a cunning rani,
Admired as she sits upon a sirianni.

Her crazed Snake is just a Car,
It needs no gas, it runs on double Bar.

She’s not alone she brings a Helix,
a pet Frog, and lots of felix.

The Frog likes to chase a Monolith,
Especially one that’s in the rhinesmith.

The Mentor shudders at the sarcastic goat
He want to leave but she wants his coat.

See ver 2.0 on my blog https://csuitementor.blogspot.com/

Jay’s Quick Poetry-The Sharp And Grand Rock

Short story that inspired me to write a Quick Poem below

Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls — family, health, friends, integrity — are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life.

The Sharp And Grand Rock

A Poem by Jay Parkhe

Whose rock is that? I think I know.
Its owner is quite angry though.
He was cross like a dark potato.
I watch him pace. I cry A’llo.

He gives his rock a shake,
And screams you’ve made a bad mistake.
The only other sound’s the break,
Of distant glasses and bars awake.

The Rock is sharp, Grand and deep,
But he has promises to keep,
Tormented with nightbirds he never sleeps.
Revenge is a promise a man must keep.

He rises from his flat bed,
With thoughts of violence in his head,
A flash of rage and he sees red.
Without a men-O-pause you turned and fled.

With thanks to the poet, Robert Frost, for the underlying structure

Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job

via Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job

Best Stories for Startpreneurs, SMEs.

Monday Wrap | 23rd July 2018

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Udaipur-based Medhola brings medical services to your doorstep

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Jaipur-based MeraPatient aims to bring more offline pharma stores online

When Manish Mehta, a CA, and Alok Khandelwal a journalist, decided to start up, they thought of building a product that served society. They realised that despite the profusion of digital healthcare platforms, there wasn’t a single point that brought together all stakeholders in the healthcare system. Enter Jaipur-based MeraPatient, which aims to bring more offline pharma stores online.

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Delivery after delivery, CampusKhana is driving away students’ hunger pangs in Indore’s colleges

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Jaipur-based HR-tech startup WorkNrBy helps you find job opportunities close to home

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Kolkata-based Obo believes on-demand concierge service is the need of the day

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Paramotor aims to reach POS solution to small town retailers

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How MountBlue’s coding bootcamps are aiding entry-level tech hiring in startups

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Forget Facebook, YoBlunt is the next big social network that lets ‘you be you’

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How The Sales Talent is finding its niche in placing sales, marketing professionals

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Creativity : Generate new Random Sentences – Get new ideas.

  1. Please wait outside of the house.
  2. If you like tuna and tomato sauce- try combining the two. It’s really not as bad as it sounds.
  3. The shooter says goodbye to his love.
  4. The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
  5. I want more detailed informatio

Creativity brain exercise: Random Sentences generation.

  1. If you like tuna and tomato sauce- try combining the two. It’s really not as bad as it sounds.
  2. How was the math test?
  3. Lets all be unique together until we realise we are all the same.
  4. Hurry!
  5. Should we start class now, or should we wait for everyone to get here?

Story Telling : Lion, Cow and The Master/ Mentor

Why do we need a Master/ Mentor?

Story shared by a friend on WhatsApp this morning.
Once upon a time, a cow went out to graze in the jungle. Suddenly, she noticed a lion racing towards her. She turned and fled, fearing that at any moment the lion would sink his claws into her. The cow desperately looked for someplace to escape and at last, saw a shallow pond. Barely evading the lion’s reach, she jumped into the pond, and in the heat of the chase, the lion blindly leaped after her.

To the surprise of them both, the pond was extremely shallow yet filled with deep recesses of mud. After toppling over each other, the cow and the lion found themselves a short distance apart, stuck in the mud up to their necks. Both had their heads above water but were unable to free themselves no matter how much they writhed.

The lion repeatedly snarled at the cow and roared, “I am going to enjoy the sound of crunching your bones between my teeth!”

He thrashed about in fury but soon became fretful as he found no prospect of escape.

The cow thoughtfully laughed as the lion struggled to free himself and asked him, “Do you have a master?”

The lion disdainfully replied, “I am the king of the jungle. Why do you ask me if I have a master? I myself am the master!”

The cow said, “You may be the king of the jungle, but here all your power has failed to save your life.”

“And what about you?” Retorted the lion. “You are going to die here in this mud too!”’

The cow smiled mildly and said, “No, I am not.”

“If even I, the king of the jungle cannot free myself from this mud”, snapped the lion, “Then how can you, an ordinary cow?”

The cow gently replied, “I cannot free myself from this mud, but my master can. When the sun sets and he finds me absent at home, he will come looking for me. Once he finds me, he will raise me up and escort me home sweet home.”

The lion fell silent and coldly glared at the cow.

Soon enough, the sunset and the cow’s master arrived. He immediately recognized the plight she was in and lifted her to safety. As they walked home, the cow and the master both felt renewed gratitude for one another and pitied the lion they both would have been happy to save if only the lion had allowed them.

The cow represents a surrendered heart, the lion represents an egoistic mind, and the master represents the Guru. The mud represents the world, and the chase represents the struggle for existence therein.
Debrief
Its good to be independent and not rely on anyone. But don’t take it to an extreme, you always need a partner/coach/mentor/ friend who will be always on the lookout for you.

Having them does not mean you are weak, it’s just that you can be stronger with their help.
Make sure to share this story with your partner/coach/mentor/ friend and express your gratitude.

These Random Phrases have come to be a judge for my daily Creative mood like a barometer:)

YS morning Buzz newsletter I like

Daily Capsule | 18th July

Grofers goes an extra mile to get Rs 2,500 Cr in revenue this fiscal

In an effort to bring 100 million new customers online and generating Rs 2500 crore in revenue this fiscal, Delhi-based online grocery marketplace Grofers announced its foray into the FMCG segment with the launch of seven new brands under two categories – Budget and Popular G-Brands. It has also launched its app and website in Hindi. The Popular G-Brands category offers brands including ‘G Mother’s Choice’, ‘G Happy Day’ and ‘G Happy Home’. The ‘Budget category’ has ‘HaveMore’ and ‘SaveMore’ brands which claim to offer entry-level quality products.

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Jeff Bezos becomes the richest man in history as his net worth crosses $150 B

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Flipkart beats Amazon, Google in LinkedIn’s top 10 companies

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These 6 tools make life easier for HR managers and recruiters

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Hotelogix ties up with IHM-Mumbai; to offer cloud-based property management training

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