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Don’t Try to Be the “Fun Boss” — and Other Lessons in Ethical Leadership

via Don’t Try to Be the “Fun Boss” — and Other Lessons in Ethical Leadership

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Creativity, Random Phrases and my Yesterday :)

  1. Drive Me Nuts Meaning: To greatly frustrate someone. To drive someone crazy, insane, bonkers, or bananas.
  2. No-Brainer Meaning: Anything that requires minimal brain activity to accomplish.
  3. Hands Down Meaning: Anything that’s easy or has no difficulty; something that is a certainty.
  4. Greased Lightning Meaning: Very fast or quick.
  5. Easy As Pie Meaning: Something that is easy.
  6. Lickety Split Meaning: To go at a quick pace; no delaying!
  7. On the Same Page Meaning: Thinking alike or understanding something in a similar way with others.

Startup Newsletters I like

Inc42 Logo
Walmart Set To Buy $800 Mn Worth Flipkart ESOPs
It is to be noted that Walmart is obligated to purchase 6,242,271 shares from Flipkart’s ESOP pool of 11,947,026 shares. The current employees will be allowed to liquidate their employee stock ownership plans (ESOPs) at $126-128 a unit, depending on the charges applicable.
Bengaluru-based Indian regional language social platform ShareChat has raised close to $100 Mn (INR 720 Cr) in a funding round that will boost its valuation to $460 Mn (INR 3,332 Cr). This is a 7x increase to its last valuation when the company raised $18.2 Mn in Series B funding.
Togedr has raised an undisclosed amount of funding from a group of US & UK-based startups. The investment was led by UK-based investor Anil Patel whose expertise lies in cloud architecture and scale, said Togedr CEO and founder Ashish Yadav, in a recent interaction with Inc42.
The government has decided to drop the first draft of ecommerce policy and set up a committee of secretaries to decide on a new set of recommendations. CAIT said that the policy is already delayed for more than three years and if dropped, it will be a blow to the fair trade practices in ecommerce
Bengaluru-based milk and grocery delivery startup DailyNinja has raised an undisclosed amount of funding from Mumbai-based venture capital firm Matrix Partners India. Existing investors including Bengaluru-based Sequoia India and Saama Capital also participated in this funding round.
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A state-owned public sector undertaking, Maharashtra State Electricity Distribution Company Limited (MSEDCL) plans to set up 50 new EV charging stations across the state within six months. Here’s a curated rundown of other important and related developments in the India and global EV Ecosystem this week.
Since its inception in 2015, Tesseract has launched three hardware and two software products in the MR, AR, and VR sectors — Methane, Holoboard, and Quark. The founder claims to have seven patents: one US, three international (130 countries), and three India patents. The startup has already introduced Holoboard and Quark in India, and hopes to enter Western markets soon.
Read More Top Stories On Inc42

Creativity: Random phrases for Friday and how my day went.

  1. Two Down, One to Go Meaning: Two things have been completed, but there is one more that has yet to be finished.  I finished two article writing and two presentations now one more to go.  Going is tough but it gets going. 
  2. Easy As Pie Meaning: Something that is easy.  Parting was so damned easy, why did I drag my feet and procrastinate?  I should have listened to my Theta brainwave and the Gut feel the very first time.  
  3. Throw In the Towel Meaning: Giving up; to surrender.  Even the worst of urban commie brainwashed bran-heads give up in surrender, the worst of the masks can be unpeeled and the already Red Inside faces can be made bloody – it is a skill, a technique,  a hard De-mentoring and exposing the pseudos – the Freeloaders who like a pest/ Leech suck your time, efforts, money and peace of mind. Good riddance! 
  4. Right Out of the Gate Meaning: Right from the beginning; to do something from the start. Someone said about hindsight and my polite response was – I have foresight and farsight. I drive with a backview mirror – I don’t need a mirror to see driving in the fore.  The hindsight is reserve of the stray horses and mares with broken or absent shoes with hurting nail which makes them kick at everything – not in sight and ignore what is in sight.  That is where the ‘Saddle point’ of negotiations arrive and the Best Jockeys – Mentors put nose rings and blinkers ON so that they can convert the strays into Race horses.  Best trainers, jockeys have a different approach to deal with them. Branding them is the first step 🙂 
  5. Jack of All Trades Master of None Meaning: Having suitable skill in multiple things, but not being an expert in any of them.  Yes.  For too long I have been that.  45 specific online courses (on Udemy)  later – i am still searching for the right niche’ to be an expert.  Otherwise, I am sure, I shall get an Honorary D.Litt. from a friendly University one day 🙂 🙂 🙂

Wise Coach – Naive Coach

I was reading this commercial from Tony Robbins’ Newsletter ”

When someone asks you for help, how do you respond?

The naive coach tends to “over-commit.”

They feel this heartfelt pressure to help the person, so the say, “Yes! Let me share my solutions with you. I’m committed to your change. Let’s make it happen!”

Why is this naive? Because if you rush in too much as a coach, you might scare the client away!

Or worse yet, you are seen as a “nagging” friend giving them unwanted advice. Ever experience that?

The wise coach knows better. They say, “Great. I’d love to help you.”

Then the wise coach thinks to themselves, “Let’s figure out what kind of client this is.”

You see, there are four different client types. The four types have different goals. They work at different speeds.

And they have completely different expectations for their coach.

When the naive coach “rushes in” to help, they miss out on the client’s type.

They miss what’s really going on.

The wise coach first understands the client’s type, and proceeds accordingly.

Which coach do you think is more effective?

If you ever find yourself giving advice to someone who doesn’t seem to benefit… I have something for you.

Today we will be sharing one of our top strategies for bringing faster, more profound change to coaching clients.

It will also work on anyone in your life who needs your help.”

I come into the later category of coaches – the Naive Coach! I tend to commit fast, stay committed for long and rarely have I failed.

I believe that Flirting Mentor is an Oxymoron just as a term like Naive Coach is, IMHO.   A TRUE coach or mentor is neither naive nor a Flirt ! Serious coaches are Committed people and whether they commit early or later is a matter of their mind’s processes and early or late decision making capabilities/ habits – nothing else!

 

Thursday Mentor – Free Verse by Jay Parkhe

Greed 2.0

Free verse by jay

Because I could not lead with Greed,
it did kindly lead for me.
Greed, Greed, every where,
Yet not a Rupee to lead.

I cannot help but stop and look at the Alchoholic’s selfishness.
Does the selfishness make you shiver?
does it?

Pay attention to the stupid,
stupidity is the most brilliant fault of all.
Stupidity is glorious. stupidity are bright,
stupids are smart as a whip, however.

Pay attention to the egotists,
egotists are the most zany vanity of all.
Do egotists make you shiver?
do they?

Wednesday Column – Jay Parkhe’s creative Mentoring – Random Slogan Generation.

In my Mentor Column on Wednesdays Jay Mentor discusses with readers the Slogans. Do you have a Slogan? Have a look at the ones I chose for you below. Any of them make sense to you? Relevant to you? Appealing to you.

Do you think, you can expand, modify, change a wee bit and make these slogans look and work Great for you. Slogans are not merely for shouting from the hooters or rooftops – people like leaders who walk the talk.

Do you have it in you? Please go ahead and create and share your creation in the comments. I shall respond ASAP.

  1. It’s in your hands.
  2. Little miracles.
  3. Experience is key.
  4. Pushing the limits.
  5. The time is now.
  6. More than just a taste.
  7. Never stop dreaming.
  8. Be more.
  9. Redefining impossible.
  10. Shh, it’s a secret.

Random Phrases today with Creativity boosters for the day.

Great Sunday.  5th meeting of Toastmasters in 3rd Club of Bangalore. Young, vibrant crowd mixed with some bearded oldies and middle aged Techies.

  1. Love Birds Meaning: A pair of people who have a shared love for each other. No. did not happen. Day of course, began different. 
  2. Jaws of Death Meaning: Being in a dangerous or very deadly situation.  No. Not really. Saw a Premier movie for a while but did not experience it 🙂 
  3. Two Down, One to Go Meaning: Two things have been completed, but there is one more that has yet to be finished. Yes. Today’s short walk left the Udemy course study unfinished for the day .
  4. No Ifs, Ands, or Buts Meaning: Finishing a task without making any excuses. Experienced this later in the day with two Excuse Masters cleverly negotiating with each other. 
  5. Right Off the Bat Meaning: Immediately, done in a hurry; without delay. Yes. without any inhibition responded emails and gave guidance to even a mail marked FYI 🙂 🙂 . Lessons repeated in Communications. 
  6. Break The Ice Meaning: Breaking down a social stiffness.  Great speeches by two youngsters and one International Humorist champs at Toastmasters. The breaking the ice speech was literally great. 
  7. A Chip on Your Shoulder Meaning: Being angry about something that happened in the past. Yes. I still carry one anger chip on my shoulder. 
  8. Shot In the Dark Meaning: An attempt that has little chance for success.  no like hope taking shot in the dark is not part of my strategy. 
  9. Let Her Rip Meaning: Permission to start, or it could mean ‘go faster!’  If the brainfog is gone and wiser sense prevails – you don’t need any permission. 
  10. Wake Up Call Meaning: An occurance of sorts that brings a problem to somebody’s attention and they realize it needs fixing.  Hmmm… will wait and watch though. 
  11. Keep Your Shirt On Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset.  Yes. even while in an angry tone, try not to rant. 🙂

Random Acts of Kindness – Choose one. I have.

  1. Save water – take a shorter shower today
  2. Make someone’s day – tell a friend why you appreciate them
  3. Fight climate change – go vegetarian for today!
  4. Someone wronged you? Forgive them
  5. Taking public transport? Offer your seat to someone else
  6. Feed a stray animal if you spot one
  7. Surprise your parents with flowers
  8. Old laptop or mobile lying around? Donate it
  9. Help somebody with a chore they need done!
  10. No matter how annoying they can be, tell your siblings how much you appreciate them

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #3

In today’s competitive world, recruiters no longer hold on to traditional methods of recruiting through traditional one-to-one interviews. Thanks to the added competition, which has resulted in a shortage of talent, companies are fast resorting to technology, and platforms like Skype, GoToMeetings are fast replacing the old model of interviewing.

Companies are increasingly adopting employee-centric approaches to working by providing flexi-times, work-from-home initiatives, in addition to many other perks and benefits. Organizations are also getting the option to employ people they want, as compared to the ones who were available to them.

When an organization is located over multiple areas, the big challenge is to connect all the employees located in different offices spread all across the world, to the organization’s vision, identity, and rules – the big picture. That’s where coaching comes in. It is the best way to develop junior talent and provide the skills and expertise to make them experts. Having said that, mentoring provides ample space for a person to retain his individuality and his personal sensibilities.

Note that the goal of mentoring isn’t to create clones. Instead, it is to help people achieve their highest potentialwhile being in sync with the organization’s vision and objectives.

Coaching is not an innate ability; you are not born with the art of coaching. The other misunderstanding that’s often associated with coaching is that it’s related only to sports. Coaching is about pumping people’s spirits, and motivating them. Lack of motivation doesn’t come only in sports. There are times when employees too feel a need for motivation to deliver good results. Coaching helps these employees in holding their own in their team and being a productive group.

Coaching is the method of making people realize the heights they can achieve if only they kept persevering and putting proper effort. Mainly, coaching calls for a change of thinking and approach to a task. It’s about getting the person think positively about his chances of achieving his goal. It includes employee orientation towards the workplace politics, and to assist in removing the barriers to work performance.

Optimal and Optimum

There is a difference between the usages of words optimum and optimal. If a company specifies that they are interested in obtaining optimum results, they mean they want the best output from their employees. On the other hand, if they say they are looking for optimal results, that would mean that they are interested in obtaining the best work out of you in the given circumstances, or working conditions.

There are occasions when the line between optimum and optimal are blurred in coaching. Situations like these arise when an organization starts working on a new project and they need to ram up the office fast with people who are experienced in working on similar projects.

In situations like these, the job of a coach is not only to provide high levels of motivation to employees to excel in their performance, but also to ensure that the employees perform at their peak even if the requisite resources are not always available. It’s about lifting their spirit and keeping it high throughout tough times.

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #2

In today’s competitive business world, there are two basic realities that drive the workforces. First one is getting people who get results. Second is to get people who get results stay.

Today’s world of globalization, customized employee enhancement plans, competitive benefits, and demographic changes make it very tough on companies to get and then retain talent. That’s how the managers of today are not just managers. They are recruiters, planners, motivators, and trainers, all rolled into one.

To keep this already-complex chain of operation from spiraling out of control, the companies have found the best way to manage their staff is to coach them. The role of a coach in a company, in this regard, is to take a group of people with diversified proficiency, understand their strengths and improve them, and at the same time, realize the cause of their weaknesses and eradicate them.

The Role of a Coach

The role of a coach is significantly different from that of an instructor. In coaching, employees are asked to grow in their strengths and address their weaknesses so that they realize their self-growth. It keeps them motivated and happy in the workplace – both keys to retaining talent.

Leaders take their staff from where they are to where they’ve never been before. Nothing could define coaching better than this statement from Henry Kissinger.

Coaching, in the true sense, is tailor-made for people who have the potential to grow to greater heights and yet, are too content in delivering just satisfactory performance. These employees are different from slackers who don’t perform properly, either due to non-interest or inferior knowledge.

The employees we are addressing are employees who like their professional life just the way it is at the moment, and have fit in snugly to the demands of the workplace, which is not bad in itself, however, every organization needs its employees to grow. That’s the way every organization grows too, being a sum total of different talented groups. The job of a coach, therefore, is to ensure that the employees improve their job performance through a constant process of encouraging and suggesting improvements.

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #4. how coaching helps

Abstract: Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees .M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager , something he does not have a lot of experience on . At their first meeting , S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him , just to get acquainted .  In the subsequent meetings , Stanley and Morgan discussed what ‘s strengths and weaknesses were , and what the improvements in skill-sets were that Morgan had to bring back to his job . Over the next few months ,M and S regularly update their progress . They also discuss game play , tactics ,  and team building .

Let us take an example to understand how coaching benefits employees. M was recently promoted to the post of a Team Manager, something he doesn’t have a lot of experience on. He has been given the task to manage one of the teams in the company, so he sought help from a company coach to help him in understanding the requirements for the job, and to cultivate the right approach for the job. M enrolled for a two day per week course, and was assigned a coach named Stanley, who would be coaching him for the next few months.

S started by asking M to carry a workbook with him, in which M will keep a record of the discussions and guiding points that Stanley will provide to him during the learning. At their first meeting, S asked a couple of questions to M to know more about him, just to get acquainted. Then they discussed how they are going to work together, and with other people, in realizing the goals that have been set.

In the subsequent meetings, S and M discussed what M’s strengths and weaknesses were, and what the improvements in skill-sets were that M had to bring in him to excel at his job. Over the next few months, M and S met regularly to understand and analyze their progress.

They also spent time on discussing game play, tactics, and team building. Stanley constantly referred to his old coaching logs and M’s own workbook as evidences of improvement and encouraged Morgan to keep pushing his boundaries. Mock grills and role-plays were organized to check M’s improvement in team-managing under diverse and difficult scenarios.

At the end of the coaching, M commented on how useful he found the coaching process and how it made him realize the potential inside him that he had no idea he possessed. He is now a successful team-manager and a part-time coach himself to the new employees who join the company.

 

Creativity and looking back at the Random Phrases generated this morning.

  1. Fight Fire With Fire Meaning: To retaliate with an attack that is similar to the attack used against you.  Used judicially, without impulse and impatience – it is one of the best Tactical play – not a strategic one. 
  2. Drawing a Blank Meaning: Failing to recall a memory. Unable to remember something.  True. I have erased my mailbox and social media of one set of memories and I can truly use the expression ‘Tabula Rasa’ – Empty slate today. Even my memory enhancing tablets may not be able to help now. 
  3. Mountain Out of a Molehill Meaning: One who escalates small things and turns them into big problems. Hmmm… but frankly, barring cleaning of my Mac I did not face such issues. 
  4. Roll With the Punches Meaning: To tolerate or endure through the unexpected mishappenings you may encounter from time to time.  Yes. a phase is over. Hopefully. 
  5. Curiosity Killed The Cat Meaning: Typically said to indicate that any further investigation into a situation may lead to harm.  Who can agree more? Me the HyperCurious, HyperCritique, HyperScaler, HyperMentor?  I have faced this and overcome this. 
  6. Top Drawer Meaning: High quality, exceptional; something that’s very valuable.  What is more important in life than LOVE?  Nay, not money. 
  7. Playing Possum Meaning: Pretending to be dead, or to be deceitful about something. No. Not my nature but people promising to do and not doing – I have seen plenty. Lack of integrity.  Even simple courtesies to let people know they can not meet or call due to….  etc. etc. 
  8. Happy as a Clam Meaning: The state of being happy; feeling delighted.  Got three more certifications from Udemy today. 
  9. It’s Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be Meaning: Failing to meet expectations; not being as good as people say.  It takes minimum two to Tango – No?  Just asking?
  10. Quick On the Draw Meaning: Performing an action with the greatest of haste.  When procrastination takes over, self medication, self harm and self-sabotage starts. Drugs, Alchohol and other addictions begin to take over the brain and one flips into an endless abyss.  It is sad but true. 

Mentor Master Class- Free Tutorial Series 1-10 for Mentors from Jay Parkhe #1

Mentoring is the act of identifying and nurturing potential areas of improvement in an individual. This could be a short-term action plan targeted towards a specific goal in mind, like career growth, higher learning, or could be a life-long process of improvement. The goals and processes are always set here by the learner. The job of the mentor here is to just facilitate, guide, and provide feedback after long stages of intensive observation. Coaching relates primarily to performance improvement, and is more often a short-term achievement in a specific skills area. The goals, process and suggestion are that of the coach. While the learner has primary ownership of the goal, the coach has primary ownership of the process. Feedback is often shared instantaneously.

Audience

This tutorial is for designed primarily for those working professionals who are assigned the responsibility to either coach or mentor the new employees or junior talents in their companies to improve their skill-sets, or help them grow in their careers. This tutorial aims at teaching trainers the difference between coaching and mentoring, and how the approaches change as per the requirement of the learner.

Prerequisites

Before proceeding with this tutorial, you are expected to have a detailed knowledge on the working process of your company, and the job responsibilities that you will handle, and the expectation your management has of you, in terms of productivity and performance.

Thursday Mentor – Free Verse by Jay Parkhe

Greed

Free verse by jay

Because I could not lead for Greed,
it did kindly lead for me.
Pause to lead, like the Greed does.

Pay attention to the selfish,
the selfishness is the most Alchoholic stinginess of all.
Does the selfishness make you shiver?
does it?

Pay attention to the stupid,
stupidity is the most brilliant mistake of all.
Stupids are impressive. stupidity is magnificent,
stupid are vivid, however.

Why would you think egotists are large?
egotists are the most little pride of all.
Are you upset by how smaller they are?
Does it tear you apart to see the egotism so least?

Replugged: My article about 11 Mentoring approaches of Jay Parkhe

We are all a One Man Company. Jay is A Complete FootBall/ Cricket/ Hockey Team Rolled into one as an Accomplished Mentor

  1. Jay is a Coach. ( For Executives / StartPreneura / Businessman/Woman):

When you need to have older, wiser person around, who is better attuned to your industry and job, Jay can coach you through tough moments, think big picture on projects and ideas, and helps Mentees solve work-related problems. Coach is required when you need someone to help you think-through difficult problems. A good coach doesn’t solve problems; they help you see both the problem and your role clearly. They do this by observing, listening, asking focused questions, reflecting back, and challenging. Coaches can suggest strategies for solving problems you may not have considered, and can help you think “bigger picture” on ideas and possible solutions.

  1. Jay is a Connector – All Mentees need this.

There is an old saying, “It’s all about who you know?” Well, it’s who you know — along with who they know, and to whom they are willing to introduce you. Jay willingly opens up his network to help move an entrepreneur and his or her business forward. Whether it’s staking his own credibility on helping find a first customer who’s willing to take a risk on the unproven entity, or making that connection to a critical hire, Connector Jay is one of the most valuable mentoring assets a startup can have. People are generally inward looking. Connector Jay is outward-facing (makes you do a short exercise with your thumbs too which is his trademark style). Jay’s satisfaction comes from helping people meet each other. Jay has met a half dozen true connectors in life and without them, he would not have had as much success. Nobody knows why Jay loves connecting people, but this sharing traits comes from having bountiful amounts of energy and loving new ideas. Jay is a networker for 15 years of Social Media and has a wide and very deep network of people who all respect me and they often «get things done.» If you meet one of these people, hang on. (He may be prove to be your GodFather moment! 🙂

Jay is also an expert on Social media, Blogging and Networking and has spent 15 years in self-learning. He offers valuable tips, technology help, productivity support thru web tools he has tested over the years.

  1. Jay is a Challenger – For StartPreneurs, Business People, Social Enterprises.

Jay is not a mentor you’ll be spending New Year’s Eve with because he is there to call bullsh– on a lot of things that will sometimes make you uncomfortable. But that’s OK. If you want lots of happy talk, call your Mom. She will love everything you do. If you want to grow, you will want some challengers in your life who will tell you when they think you’re doing something wrong or if an idea just plain *****. They’re the ones who, after you call the Cheerleader about your great idea, will tell you a dozen ways why it won’t work unless you do X, Y, and Z. This criticism, if it comes from the right place, will set you on the right path. Challenger Jay is super smart and super fast–:) he often doesn’t have a lot of time so you’ll find he’ll give his dose of advice quickly and move on. Call on Jay only when you need him. He is not an ATM – Any Time Mentor! An entrepreneur’s drive needs to come from within, but many of us also need a healthy push to heighten our sense of passion and urgency and keep us moving forward. The Challenger’s role is to push an entrepreneur to put in the hard work, to sweat the details that matter, to hit key milestones and to outwork his/her competition. It’s also The Challenger’s responsibility to confront assumptions and ask the tough questions that ultimately prevent an entrepreneur from making costly errors.

  1. Jay is a Cheerleader – Executives, StarUps, Businesses.

You remember the people whom you can call after getting a big promotion and they will be as thrilled for you as your mother. And believe me, nobody will ever be as thrilled as Mom. In a cutthroat world, you need people who will genuinely be happy for you and who will be there when everyone else has left–i.e., after your company has gone bankrupt. Jay is one person like this who will sends encouraging texts or takes calls immediately if you are having a particularly bad day. Sometimes that’s all you need to get you through. You don’t need too many people like this–sometimes one is just enough, but this person is your rock.

Cheerleader Jay can give an entrepreneur the motivation and energy needed to persevere. That energy is also found in a supportive spouse, parent or in good friends, but it really helps to have someone with relevant experience and credibility say, “You can do this.”

5.Jay is an Educator – An Advisor for Business People

Jay was a Visiting B School Faculty for 15 years and and Advisor to Two New Educational Institutes and three Skills Development companies. As an Educator: Starting a business is the steepest learning curve anyone can experience. The tests of building a business are frequent — and lessons are ongoing. Educator is someone who sees in an entrepreneur a desire to learn and is willing to sit down and teach him/her when needed. From business basics to complex ideas and practices, they’ll take the time to understand knowledge gaps and help entrepreneurs avoid the costly mistakes that can be caused by being too proud to ask for help or advice. Educator is a person who takes the time to sit down and share their expertise with those who want to learn. Educators love to help others by sharing their wisdom. They want to see everyone succeed!

  1. Jay is an Ideator – StartUp, Running Businesses, C-Level Executive Coach

Jay is a Creative Thinker, Critical Thinker, Lateral Thinker and also an Elastic Thinker = The Ideator Jay asks you Are you dreaming big enough? Are you being as creative as you can be? When an entrepreneur is buried in executing day-to-day tasks and sweating the small stuff in the trenches, taking the time to pause and survey the bigger picture is critical for keeping a business moving in the right direction. The Ideator loves to play the role of thought partner which Jay calls as Accountability Partner a term he borrows from his Mentor and Coach Dr. Marshall Goldsmith as an entrepreneur thinks critically about how to build a creative and differentiated business

  1. Jay the Librarian – Executives, StartUps, Businesses,

Jay is a powerhouse of knowledge and experience. He is a walking encyclopedia on subjects he likes and has invested his time to learn more, informally. As you navigate through life, it’s helpful to be able to pull from various resources to help you get along. The Librarian has a wealth of information on your community, clubs, organizations and support systems. They know a resource for almost any need and are aware of where to go to get questions answered or to get things done.

8.Jay the Super Star and Idol to many of his Mentees – Executives, StartUps

We need to find people who we admire. People who are living parts of ourf life in a way you aspire to, or who currently have the career that you want to have. Spend time with them and get to know their routines, their resources, how they go about their days. While their way is not the only way, you can gain valuable insight into steps you might want to take to get you closer to your goals!

9.Jay can be your Teammate – Executives, StartUps, Businesses

Some days you just need an awesome listener. Someone to remind you that it’s okay; tomorrow is another day. A good teammate realizes that you aren’t always looking for a solution to your problem, or a motivational speech to spur you on. You just need someone to listen with a sympathetic ear, and then allow you to move on.

  1. Jay is a small brand – Startups and Businesses. Social enterprises.

with image, reputation and following – I support your Brand Story development by sharing my successes and failures transparently and helping you find your own answers in moments of Crisis. Jay helps entrepreneurs Dream Big – Define their Vision, Set their Mission, Goals, Objectives, Action Plans by working on a Long and Mid Term Strategy for their businesses. He then helps them to begin execution by drawing up a Project Management dummy set up with timelines, deadlines, Reviews, course correction etc.

Not all Jay’s mentees need his Entire gamut of skills. They sometimes pick and choose specific ones to save time, energy and effort or duplication.

  1. Jay is a Non-Playing Captain, Coach and Mentor

Jay takes an impassionate, detached, cold look at the business as it passes thru its crisis, turnaround, loss making phases and offers to work with the team to find solutions by brainstorming, creative thinking technique. His methods are unique, they do stand the test of time eventhough they may not have been tested in your industry.

Tuesday Mentor : How many ‘Formulas’ and Ópen Secrets’ of SUCCESS will keep producing Bestsellers? Jay Parkhe

Formula For YOUR Success!

While everyone who seems to come up with SUCCESS, FORMULA, SECRET in their titles makes to the best seller list of books – rarely one formula is good for Home businesses or Startpreneurs.

Summary:

Outline your tasks daily using the day timer you will know what day and time you can repost your ads or emails to Safelists. This is a great time saver. If you have multiple email accounts a program called GMAIL Aps is tops, login one place and check them all at once. A lot times for every task to get the most important done early

Keywords:

<a href=”http://parkhe.com”>{anchors}</a>,<a href=”http://parkhe.com”>{anchors}</a>

Finding your niche so you can concentrate. When you find out what your specialty is then you can start to promote to the people that are working on the same type of things you are. Are you just with a program to make money as an affiliate? Do you have your own website that goes back to your affiliate site?

Are you selling homemade products?

Are you someone that is selling from his/her own store or mall?

There are so many different things to promote and you want to reach your target audience to get the results that you are seeking.

Outline your tasks daily using the day timer you will know what day and time you can repost your ads or emails to Safelists. This is a great time saver. If you have multiple email accounts a program called GMAIL Apps is tops, login one place and check them all at once. A lot times for every task to get the most important done early when you are full of energy. Take breaks so you can re-evaluate what you are doing and be more receptive to tasks still to be done. Organization will set you above the crowd because you will accomplish more.

Reach your crowd after finding your niche you need to advertise to your target. Go to forums and post to the ones that fit your niche so you will be working your ads to people with the same goals and targets you have. In the forums you will not be able to blatantly set your ads out, post what you would like to add and then leave your signature with your URL in it. If they enjoyed or learned from your post they might want to follow up by visiting your site.

Mentors get you trained and help stimulate the learning process. They keep you fortified with uplifting values and appeal to your excitement. With the right mentor you will go farther because you are learning from them, this shortens your learning curve. When you work with others listen and you will gain information from them from what they have been doing in their promotion.

Using every avenue of promotion, traffic exchanges also use banner views for your credits. They have blog exchanges, you view others blogs to get traffic to your blog. They also have banner rotators you can post one url in the banner slot with 5 banners loaded to cycle through. Just a few of the ways to make your time work better with tools online. Before you purchase any software online check out and see what other people have to say about it at Google. This is a way to find out before you have put out your money for software that will

not be used. Market wisely and then you will be in the profit zone.

Leave nothing to chance, ad trackers help you to find which promotion is working for you. This also depends on titles and content when this has been checked and it still does not pull people in, then leave the non-producers behind and find new ones. Traffic Hoopla has the top promoters listed every week; this is a good resource to check. This one costs but still a good resource- Traffic Testers.

Advertise, and advertise some more, you just have to get the word out. Even the big names put their logos and advertising out there for millions of dollars. You can start with the free ones and after making money move on and put your money out for paid advertising. Keep your records so you know what you are spending and what is bringing the people to your site.

Creativity: Generate Random Phrases and relate to the day gone by…

  1. Go For Broke Meaning: To risk it all, even if it means losing everything. To go all out. That’s crazy ain’t it? But some do. And to go by the mindfulness and other courses I am doing they say listening to heart, thinking thru heart is good. Wondering what is right?
  2. Roll With the Punches Meaning: To tolerate or endure through the unexpected mishappenings you may encounter from time to time. Yes. it is a bit quixotic past 6 months. But past 3 are better with all the certifications and blog writing.  Things average out indeed. 
  3. Love Birds Meaning: A pair of people who have a shared love for each other Hmmm…. Will have to rack my brains to find who ? 🙂
  4. Ring Any Bells? Meaning: Recalling a memory; causing a person to remember something or someone.  Can we ’cause’ someone to remember/ recall a memory – Seriously ! I can only associate it with Traumatic or may be dramatic and laughable :0) What do you think?
  5. Curiosity Killed The Cat Meaning: Typically said to indicate that any further investigation into a situation may lead to harm.  Listening to some of the Udemy lectures I now know – Seeing and taking things on face value is incorrect. They use some jargon for it. But then Hypercurious like me – we Kill such cats! All the time 🙂 
  6. Cry Over Spilt Milk Meaning: It’s useless to worry about things that  already happened and cannot be changed. This is so true!  Which is why my Guru and Mentor brought the manufacturing term into coaching called “Feedforward” as we can only create better future and can’t correct the past ( like some pseudo-sickular historians in India who are well paid to re-write history). Sad! 
  7. Foaming At The Mouth Meaning: To be enraged and show it. The Tamil song Kolavari Di and Hindi word – Khunnas should find a way into Oxford dictionary now – Foaming at mouth is so Passe’! 
  8. If You Can’t Stand the Heat, Get Out of the Kitchen Meaning: One should discontinue with a task if they are unable to cope with it due to pressure.  I also read an advice to a girl today (purportedly by Confucius – spelt wrongly that if the man of her choice is not better than her – he is not for her or something like that – Wah! ) 
  9. Hands Down Meaning: Anything that’s easy or has no difficulty; something that is a certainty.  What’s that!?  Truly, I would like to know – I have gone thru so much bad times but things always averaged out for me. 
  10. High And Dry Meaning: To be left behind; abandoned. Being in a helpless situation without a way to recover. When you meet quixotic, unpredictables and semi-insane people in life and give your trust, empathy to them – you will be in for a shock of your life and will always find yourself in this damned situation. 

My Random Acts of Kindness suggestions


  1. Smile at 3 people today
  2. Treat a friend – buy them lunch!
  3. Offer to help your neighbours/friends with chores
  4. Compliment someone today!
  5. Gift someone something they complimented you for
  6. House chores can be tiring – offer a helping hand
  7. Hug your parents
  8. Surprise your parents with flowers
  9. Share today’s food with your neighbour!
  10. Feeling brave? Give blood

Random Act of Kindness. I have chosen one. Please choose what you like.

  1. Treat a friend – buy them lunch!
  2. Surprise your siblings with their favourite sweets/chocolate
  3. We all love surprises! Buy someone an unexpected gift
  4. Pick up somebody else’ tab next time you go for a coffee
  5. Recycle 3 things today
  6. Help an elderly person cross the road or up the stairs
  7. Pay for someone else’s meal today
  8. Help someone academically – lend them your study notes
  9. Tell a friend about ARK/World Kindness Day
  10. Hug your parents

Jay’s Creativity Tantra : Generate Random Phrases every day.

  1. Playing For Keeps Meaning: Said when things are about to get serious. I do give up at times. but I do give it a very serious try. In one recent case I gave up after 50 serious attempts to help.  When people do not wish to help themselves – who am I to help. 
  2. It’s Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be Meaning: Failing to meet expectations; not being as good as people say.  Yes that is my not wish.
  3. When the Rubber Hits the Road Meaning: When something is about to begin, get serious, or put to the test.  I am going to junk few Udemy courses I enrolled Free and have not gone to them yet. I wish to revise the ones I finished quickly but would like to re-read/ listen/ watch. 
  4. It’s Not Brain Surgery Meaning: A task that’s easy to accomplish, a thing lacking complexity.  I wish I get one today. 
  5. Like Father Like Son Meaning: Resembling one’s parents in terms of appearance or behavior. My receding hairline or the growing Temple from both sides makes me resemble my father. I do wish I had my mother’s blue eyes and my father’s Dark Tan – near black color rather than the pale brown I have 🙂 .  I do have their Temper, I do have their killer instincts and I do have the hunger for knowledge and the will to chase building reputation instead of money. 
  6. No Ifs, Ands, or Buts Meaning: Finishing a task without making any excuses.  FINISHIATIVE is a term I used for many years now. It has come to stay with me.
  7. Lickety Split Meaning: To go at a quick pace; no delaying!  At my Age, is there another option?  Slowdown is not my option. Hope is not part of my strategy.
  8. Talk the Talk Meaning: Supporting what you say, not just with words, but also through action or evidence. Yes! That is Integrity for me. Do what I say. Fulfill every promise I made, fulfill every commitment before I am dead. 
  9. Not the Sharpest Tool in the Shed Meaning: Someone who isn’t witty or sharp, but rather, they are ignorant, unintelligent, or senseless.  I hope I do not have to deal with one today. 
  10. Don’t Look a Gift Horse In The Mouth Meaning: When you receive a gift from someone, do not be ungrateful. I so believe in this. I love gifting more than receiving. Rarely I go for a Quid Pro Quo!. 


Great Idioms Generated today: Predicting the day and being creative with Randomness –

I am doing a new Learning course about Master 5 key elements of Story Writing/ Telling.

The Key elements are

  1. Character
  2. Objective
  3. Conflict
  4. Action
  5. Stakes

To Ramp this all up – it is essential to churn some new ideas and I am using the Random Phrases/ Idiom Generation methods.  This is close to what I learnt at Dr. Edward de Bono’s Serious creativity and Lateral thinking books and trainings. They are great.

A Good Plan’s All You Need.  This is true. I need to plan again. Have tried several things, done several things. My core is into Strategy and Planning but have done many things impulsively.  Good Random inputs.

A Bandage For Your Sorrow.   Is there a Bandage for Sorrows? I have proved to be with a touch of Magic and the remaining half of my heart ( after cardiac issues) of Gold, Pure and Untouched.  But what I really need is a Hand that heals those unseen, only felt wounds and sorrows people undergo. It is a gift I keep demanding the God and wait for his Kindness to shower.

The Hopes Of The Devil.  I shall park these for the moments.
———————
A Whistle In The Wind.
———————
Just A Bump On My Head.  

If any of our readers have any thoughts, suggestions – they are welcome.

Creativity and Fun with Random Sentences generated.

  1. Lets all be unique together until we realise we are all the same. 
  2. If I don’t like something, I’ll stay away from it.
  3. Writing a list of random sentences is harder than I initially thought it would be.
  4. A song can make or ruin a person’s day if they let it get to them.
  5. Is it free?

Random Acts of Kindness.

  1. Make someone’s day – tell a friend why you appreciate them
  2. Old laptop or mobile lying around? Donate it
  3. Make someone a cup of coffee
  4. It’s hard to stay connected – reach out to an elderly person you know
  5. Give up your seat on the tube/bus
  6. Help a younger student with their work
  7. Write a complimentary note for someone
  8. Make a hot beverage for a friend/family
  9. Plant a seed
  10. Reconnect with your grandparents or an elderly person you know – give them a call!

Random Acts of Kindness

Author Anne Herbert coined the phrase “Random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty,” basing it on the all-too-commonly used “random acts of violence and senseless acts of cruelty.” The idea has caught on, but there are times when you shouldn’t be practicing acts of kindness. So, before we look at why you should practice them, let’s be mindful of two reasons why you shouldn’t do so:

  • Self-aggrandisement and publicity.That’s right! No selfies when you give that homeless guy food!
  • Getting in the way of emergency services (although your intentions are good). In situations where emergency services are already active, ask how you can help instead of just diving in head-first.

Lastly, let’s not forget that charity begins at home. Unexpectedly helping a friend or family member also counts. The person you help needn’t be a stranger. Now that we’ve got beyond the caveats, let’s look at some reasons why you should practice random acts of kindness.

You genuinely get to help, even if it’s only in a small way

This one’s a real no-brainer. You aren’t being kind if you aren’t helping. By helping someone else, even if it’s only holding a door open, smiling at someone or offering to carry shopping bags, you have genuinely helped. The person you’ve been kind to feels more valued, and who knows? There could be a knock-on effect.

Make others feel good

There are a lot of sad, lonely or depressed people out there. Even if the person you help wasn’t feeling down, you’ll make them feel good. If you’re truly a kind person, this will be one of your prime reasons for practicing random acts of kindness.

Feel good yourself

Although this shouldn’t be the reason why you are kind to others, it will be an inevitable consequence. Psychologists point out that as social creatures, helping others satisfies a very deep need within our psyche. It’s instinctive and inevitable. Your self-esteem will improve because you’ll feel like a “good person.” You may even find yourself smiling to yourself when you think about some act of kindness you’ve carried out or are planning.

Build stronger relationships

When you practice kindness as a habit, and do things you don’t have to do to help people you know, you’ll build stronger relationships. If you are ever in a disagreement or do something silly that isn’t helpful at all, you’re far more likely to be forgiven.

Change someone’s life for the better

You never know when something kind that you do will change someone’s life for the better. I recently read a story about a drug addict who lived on the streets and was always treated like filth. One day, he received a small act of kindness from someone, and it made him realize that he still had worth as a human being. He went on to quit drugs, and later became a motivational speaker. Even a small act of kindness can have very powerful, even life-changing, effects.

Give, and you never know, you may receive when you need it most

I’m not sure if we should believe in instant karma, but one thing is certain: when you help others, they become more willing to help you. Since we all go through difficulties at some point in life, that help can prove to be more important to you than you would ever believe.

Others will pass it forward

Kindness is catching. Has someone ever made your day, and you spend the rest of it spreading the sunshine? That’s what I’m talking about!

You’ll become less judgmental

This is a tough one, but when we start seeing people as human beings and not as “labels” like “worthless drug addict,” a “homeless wastrel” or “sourpuss,” we feel a lot better. Everyone has their own problems, and whether they are to blame for them or not, it’s not our place to judge them. Make a point of helping someone you don’t really like. It’s good practice.

Life will have more meaning to you

If you’re forever planning acts of kindness, or grabbing opportunities to help those in need, you’ll be eager to see what each new day will bring.

Make the world a better place

Imagine if everybody in the world was kind to others. What a wonderful place the world would be! You can’t force others to be kind, but you can do your best, and the kindness contagion will spread. Whether you can help in large ways or small, do what you can to build the momentum.

Creativity: Random Inputs generated this morning for today

Quick and Dirty

Meaning:

Things that are fixed with great speed, but as a result, it’s probably not going to work very well.  The quick trip this year did not expect any result even after a month and I was little depressed.  But the Brainwave and Udemy courses I am doing are really balancing.

There’s No I in Team

Meaning:

To not work alone, but rather, together with others in order to achieve a certain goal.  The recent attempts to work as a team member without putting skin in the game has not worked.  Partner trouble of the past always comes back however much I try to let it go.

Burst Your Bubble

Meaning:

To ruin someone’s happy moment.  No I did not and will not do that.

Break The Ice

Meaning:

Breaking down a social stiffness. Hmmm… I think I shall shrink all other social activities and whatever is going on and just focus on 2 or 3 major big ticket items only.  I need finishiative myself.

Right Off the Bat

Meaning:

Immediately, done in a hurry; without delay. But it did not yield any results. May be the introduction was not done well or my offerings were wrong or may be I was not seen as the choice or I failed to sell my services well.

I Smell a Rat

Meaning:

A feeling that something is not quite right, or awry.  That sinking feeling ! Ahh !  but I am learning lessons on Self hypnosis and they are good. They work.

It’s Not Brain Surgery

Meaning:

A task that’s easy to accomplish, a thing lacking complexity.  No. I do not have any simple task in my task list. I must just junk it and fill it up with small simple tasks and steps I can do and applaud myself , pat my own back.

 

Bully – A Didactic Cinquain

Bully – A Didactic Cinquain

by jay

Bully

Snappy, Chiding

Joking, funloving, KickAss Humor

Ever so recidivist

Tor-Mentor

Creativity: Random Phrases for today

  1. Ride Him, Cowboy! Meaning: A cheer people yell, usually at rodeos when cowboys are clinging to the backs of untamed horses.  We had this moment today! My wife finally got to Exhibit her years of work in a State Level Art Gallery. Whether she makes a sale or not – her wish is fulfilled. God is great. 
  2. Let Her Rip Meaning: Permission to start, or it could mean ‘go faster!’ How lucky some mentorees get! I was chasing them for an award submission and the second extension is for 60 full days ! Some people are so lucky. Reminder Mentors are Bad 🙁 
  3. Playing Possum Meaning: Pretending to be dead, or to be deceitful about something. Hmmm… Let’s see how the day unfolds. 
  4. Jig Is Up Meaning: For a ruse or trick to be discovered; to be caught. Yes. Had to scold and snub. 
  5. Don’t Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch Meaning: Do not rely on something you are not sure of. Yes. Not sure of what this means today! 🙂 
  6. Under the Weather Meaning: Not feeling well, in health or mood.  Sad day three therapists refused to entertain after giving dates and the fourth was so pricey 1 I decided let my purse not go under the weather 🙂 
  7. Lickety Split Meaning: To go at a quick pace; no delaying! Yes. A proposal submitted. hopefully a meeting and finalisation soon. 
  8. Eat My Hat Meaning: Having confidence in a specific outcome; being almost sure about something.  Yes. Completing total of 58 Udemy courses I am sure about. Not sure, if I will become an instructor. 
  9. Don’t Look a Gift Horse In The Mouth Meaning: When you receive a gift from someone, do not be ungrateful.  It happens to me all the time. I am a non-choosy Giver. 
  10. Long In The Tooth Meaning: Old in age. Mainly used when referring to people or horses. Hmmm.  … I acquire another New Label.  See am Social not Anti Social.  I get a label 🙂 WOW. 

Adieu – Free Verse by Jay – Dhananjay Parkhe

In a Mentor’s life, Mentees come for:
1. A Reason
2. A Season,
3. Or for life and accept him/ her as Life Coach.
After a longish Five and half month I bid adieu to a worthy mentoree finally today.

Adieu
Free verse by Jay
(On Cloud Nine:Meaning: Having strong feelings of happiness or satisfaction. )
Congratulations, however hard you try,
I Will always Praise.
Do congratulations make you shiver?
do they?

The communion that’s really anathema,
Above all others are the serenades.
Do serenades make you shiver?
do they?

All that is little is not hello,
hello, by all account is big.
Down, down, down into the darkness of the hello,
Gently it goes – the liberal, the high, mighty fellow.

Adieu is faces of death music.
faces of death music is Adieu.
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”.
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”,
“a strolling guitarist serenades the diners”.
Adieu

Creativity: Random Phrases generated for the day, predict the day ahead.

  1. Wake Up Call Meaning: An occurance of sorts that brings a problem to somebody’s attention and they realize it needs fixing.  Just wondering, how many wake up calls one needs? One per day?  For those day dreaming? Multiple times a day:) 
  2. Like Father Like Son Meaning: Resembling one’s parents in terms of appearance or behavior. Hmmm…. Appearance is OK. Behavior – may be not! 🙂
  3. In the Red Meaning: Losing money. Being in debt.  But the people in Red so get habituated of high living and dependence on others money – they seldom come down from their high horses. 
  4. A Chip on Your Shoulder Meaning: Being angry about something that happened in the past. Yes. It happens to me all the time. Difficult to let go of the past. 
  5. Mouth-watering Meaning: Delicious; something that looks or tastes appetizing.
  6. Foaming At The Mouth Meaning: To be enraged and show it.  Ha Ha ha – I do it without foaming at the mouth – I type! 
  7. Cry Wolf Meaning: Someone that calls for help when it is not needed. Someone who is lying.  Hmmm… many recent cases of false alarms responded – leading to waste of time and going into a spin unnecessarily. 
  8. Easy As Pie Meaning: Something that is easy.  Nothing is? Is there anything easy at all?
  9. Tough It Out Meaning: To remain resillient even in hard times; enduring. Tough minded optimision, grit, determination and a firm commitment – yes, that’s what it is for me. 

Creativity: Random Phrase generated this morning and how day is ending…

  1. Money Doesn’t Grow On Trees Meaning: Suggests that money is a resource that must be earned and is not one that’s easily acquired. I sometimes wonder how deep the negotiations go into cutting into teacher’s courses. I found it absurd when the negotiator of an educational institute was so unreasonable – he was happy if I said I will teach ProBono 🙂 I said NO! 
  2. Give a Man a Fish Meaning: It’s better to teach a person how to do something than to do that something for them.  I TOTALLY agree after this year’s lessons I learnt. Doing things for free, offering free advice has no Value. People like PRICE these days and are mostly unwilling to pay or negotiate hard for a ProBono bargain. The attitudes are so horrific. 
  3. What Am I, Chopped Liver? Meaning: A rhetorical question used by a person who feels they are being given less consideration than someone else. Playing Victim, playing damsel in distress like ( even guys do this 🙂  ) is characteristic of some Millennials I have dealt with in the recent past. 
  4. On the Same Page Meaning: Thinking alike or understanding something in a similar way with others. Rare to find agreements and I like to push forward with even a few agreements. 
  5. Poke Fun At Meaning: Making fun of something or someone; ridicule.  Is this second nature in marathi families ?  We love to poke fun, pun, pull legs so much that when we do this to others who come close  – it demagnetises and repulses them. 
  6. Off One’s Base Meaning: A person that is crazy or behaving in idiotic ways.  Body language, facial gestures, awkward neck and eye movements all depict disinterest – why don’t people be cogent enough to say it on the face. 
  7. When the Rubber Hits the Road Meaning: When something is about to begin, get serious, or put to the test. The real tests hopefully start for a new Revenue making stint next month onwards. 
  8. Yada Yada Meaning: A way to notify a person that what they’re saying is predictable or boring.  Wonderful expression. I like it. 🙂
  9. Keep Your Shirt On Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset. What I have come across this year mostly are those who offer their shirts when they are REALLY naked. 
  10. Down For The Count Meaning: Someone or something that looks to be defeated, or nearly so.  Hmmm… That’s not me ! Never.  🙂

Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor | Ladders

via Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor | Ladders

 

MENTORSHIPS

Here’s why you should stop looking for a mentor

Will you be my mentor?

This question makes me cringe. It’s not that I don’t want to help. I do — I really do. It’s just that when someone asks me to be their mentor, I don’t know what I’m signing up for. The question feels like a marriage proposal from someone I’ve never met, an indefinite labor contract with unspecified terms of service, and a giant pile of responsibility on an already full plate.

But I understand where people are coming from. We’ve been spoon-fed the idea that finding a mentor is a prerequisite for success. Countless business books and self-help guides preach the importance of a good mentor. Under this image we have nurtured, a mentor takes a mentee under their wing, like Socrates and Plato, Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg, and Mr. Miyagi and Daniel. The relationship then blossoms, and the mentee achieves philosophical greatness, makes billions, or wins the All Valley Karate Championship.

I hate to be a buzzkill, but this isn’t how things work in real life. We wait for a good mentor to arrive like a prophet, whisk us from our canyon of despair, and push us up the ladder of success. But that mentor often doesn’t come, at least not in the form that we’re expecting. We then use the lack of a mentor as an excuse for not getting started.

The solution to this quandary appears in a scene in Good Will Hunting, one of my favorite movies. In the scene, Sean McGuire, the therapist played by Robin Williams, asks Matt Damon’s genius character, Will Hunting, if he has a soulmate—someone who challenges him.

After some meandering, Will replies: “I got plenty. Shakespeare, Nietzsche, Frost, O’Connor, Kant, Pope, Locke.” Sean mocks this answer: “That’s great. They’re all dead.” Undeterred, Will says: “Not to me, they’re not.”

Will is on to something. We assume our soulmates and sources of inspiration have to be real-life mentors who are a quick phone call or an email away. But that assumption is false. As Elizabeth Gilbert writes, mentors “live on the shelves of your library; they live on the walls of museums; they live in recordings made decades ago.”

No one has taught me more about democracy than the Czech writer and politician Vaclav Havel. He’s not alive. No one has taught me more about writing than Stephen King. I’ve never met him. No one has taught me more about humility than the Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius. He’s been fertilizing daffodils for nearly two thousand years. No one has inspired me more about leveraging failure for success than Sara Blakely. I saw her on the television show Billions once, but our paths have never crossed.

All I had to do to learn from these incredible people, and many others like them, was to study their lives. Take, for example, Stephen King. I treat his fiction like a textbook. I highlight, underline, circle, and review. I’ve learned more from studying his writing than I ever could from a formal “mentoring” session where I would ask him if he has any advice on writing (to which he would probably respond, “Go read my books.”).

You can channel the power of these teachers without holding a seance. Pick your favorite source of inspiration and ask yourself this question: What would they do if they were in my shoes? What would Elon Musk do when faced with this challenge? How would Elizabeth Gilbert tackle this creativity problem? How would Jane Austen develop the character in my novel? If you’ve done your homework, and studied their works, you’ll know what the answer is.

So, to those of you looking for real-life mentors, I say, stop looking.

Your mentors are already all around you.

You just have to open your eyes to see them.

Ozan Varol is a rocket scientist turned law professor and bestselling author. Click here to download a free copy of his e-book, The Contrarian Handbook: 8 Principles for Innovating Your Thinking. Along with your free e-book, you’ll get the Weekly Contrarian — a newsletter that challenges conventional wisdom and changes the way we look at the world (plus access to exclusive content for subscribers only).

This article first appeared on OzanVarol.com.

Random phrases generated for creative juices to flow:)

  1. Shot In the Dark Meaning: An attempt that has little chance for success. But worth taking. I don’t leave till the end, whenever it comes – it may or may not come. Keep at it. 
  2. Birds of a Feather Flock Together Meaning: People tend to associate with others who share similar interests or values. Yes. Especially Conniving, Nefarious, Nexus of Corrupt always find ways to come together. 
  3. On the Ropes Meaning: Being in a situation that looks to be hopeless! Hmmm… In such cases, I do not persist. I take a walk. A childhood trait.  Whenever there was an issue about Captaincy and someone wanted to be one instead of me – I’d walk away and start a new club, a new team and remain the Captain. What an authoritarian, autocrat I was. No?
  4. Down And Out Meaning: (1) A term used in a boxing. (2) Someone who has become incapacitated.  No. Never. Never give up.  I was able to contain the heart disease with Doctors, family help and my own determination.  I still live with half a heart pumping at only 35% but I choose to live and not give up.
  5. Hear, Hear Meaning: A shout of agreement, or to draw attention to a speaker.  No many times do we hear this.  These days, like the purchase managers of the olden days, people are taught to say NO NO NO NO till their tongue bleeds. 🙂

Creativity and Random phrases for today.

  1. Roll With the Punches Meaning: To tolerate or endure through the unexpected mishappenings you may encounter from time to time.  Yes. As an ex Boxer I am ready to face them. 
  2. Back To the Drawing Board Meaning: Starting over again on a new design from a previously failed attempt. Starting to publish the Poetry ebook from my blog tomorrow is the deadline. How I hate deadlines. 
  3. Jack of All Trades Master of None Meaning: Having suitable skill in multiple things, but not being an expert in any of them.  Yes I am one. No problem with that. 
  4. Rain on Your Parade Meaning: To spoil someone’s fun or plans; ruining a pleasurable moment.  Happened this morning and suggested solutions to overcome the issues and mitigate risks. 
  5. Hear, Hear Meaning: A shout of agreement, or to draw attention to a speaker. Yet to happen. 
  6. I Smell a Rat Meaning: A feeling that something is not quite right, or awry. That sinking feeling… Why does it always occur on my bad biorhythm days?

I liked this parable : Mathew 13

The Parable of the Sower (sometimes called the Parable of the Soils) is a parable of Jesusfound in the three Synoptic Gospels in Matthew 13:1-23, Mark 4:1-20, and Luke 8:4-15.

In the story, a sower sows seed and does so indiscriminately. Some seed falls on the path (wayside) with no soil, some on rocky ground with little soil, and some on soil which contained thorns. In these cases the seed is taken away or fails to produce a crop, but when it falls on good soil it grows, yielding thirty, sixty, or a hundredfold.

Jesus then (only in the presence of his disciples) explains that the seed represents the Gospel (the sower being anyone who proclaims it), and the various soils represent people’s responses to it (the first three representing rejection while the last represents acceptance.

I’m a gardener Mentor. I try and die the seeds to make Dreams grow into ambitions, translating into Vision, mission, goals, objectives, action plans, biz, marketing plans etal.

In my efforts, sometimes I come across very distressed mentees. I have to work on making the soil good as they have rocky soil of past bad experiences, thorny soil which does not allow seeds to germinate, or find soil. I spend 5, 13, 26, 52 weeks depending upon the STATE, and SITUATION.

I Sometimes come across Sand, silt or clay land or simply rocky land. Rarely I find delta land ( usualy in C Suite execs) which is fertile . Each gets a different mentor treatment.

It works. There are failures too. As the mentorees stop responding and throw seeds on footpath – it is eaten by birds and pigeons.

In one case, after sowing 150 revenue ideas and rigorously, tilling the land I found failure. I decided to move on. As the farmer/ mentoree just did not understand and allowed my gardening efforts fail.

Sad but true! It happens.

Gardener then moves on too…

A Lass Called Jane by Jay

A Lass Called Jane

by Jay

There once was a old lass who lied.
She said, “See the lovely stride!”
It was rather simple,
But not mushroom pimple,
And she couldn’t resist the coincide.

The Mentor and the MonaLisa Rhyming Couplet Ideas -Ver 1.0 by Jay

The Mentor and the MonaLisa

Rhyming Couplet Ideas by Jay

See the snuffing of the Mentor,
I think he’s angry at the core.

He finds it hard to see the accidental,
Overshadowed by the brainy rental.

Who is that practicing near the coat?
I think she’d like to eat the goat.

She is but a cunning rani,
Admired as she sits upon a sirianni.

Her crazed Snake is just a Car,
It needs no gas, it runs on double Bar.

She’s not alone she brings a Helix,
a pet Frog, and lots of felix.

The Frog likes to chase a Monolith,
Especially one that’s in the rhinesmith.

The Mentor shudders at the sarcastic goat
He want to leave but she wants his coat.

See ver 2.0 on my blog https://csuitementor.blogspot.com/

Jay’s Quick Poetry-The Sharp And Grand Rock

Short story that inspired me to write a Quick Poem below

Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls — family, health, friends, integrity — are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life.

The Sharp And Grand Rock

A Poem by Jay Parkhe

Whose rock is that? I think I know.
Its owner is quite angry though.
He was cross like a dark potato.
I watch him pace. I cry A’llo.

He gives his rock a shake,
And screams you’ve made a bad mistake.
The only other sound’s the break,
Of distant glasses and bars awake.

The Rock is sharp, Grand and deep,
But he has promises to keep,
Tormented with nightbirds he never sleeps.
Revenge is a promise a man must keep.

He rises from his flat bed,
With thoughts of violence in his head,
A flash of rage and he sees red.
Without a men-O-pause you turned and fled.

With thanks to the poet, Robert Frost, for the underlying structure

Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job

via Survey: 68% of CEOs Admit They Weren’t Fully Prepared for the Job

Best Stories for Startpreneurs, SMEs.

Monday Wrap | 23rd July 2018

Meet the 13-year-old who harnessed Mumbai’s dabbawala network for his courier service

Starting up young just got a new benchmark. Meet the 13-year-old who harnessed Mumbai’s dabbawala network for his courier service. Tilak Mehta, a Class 8 student at Garodia International School in Mumbai, started Papers N Parcels to help Mumbaikars courier their things around the city for same-day delivery at the cheapest rates. The business is self-funded, with his family putting in the initial funding; Tilak intends to pay it back once the company is profitable.

Read more

Why Singapore-based Alluma is betting big on global crypto trade

Virtual currency may be on the RBI radar, but we tell you why Singapore-based Alluma is betting big on global crypto trade. Founded by Akash Agarwal in 2017, the crypto exchange brings together robust compliance processes, an advanced yet easy-to-use platform and UI, and a tight security framework. The startup still does peer-to-peer transfers and maintains accounts with banks globally as it is registered in Singapore.

Read more

Udaipur-based Medhola brings medical services to your doorstep

What if the doctor could come home when you were unwell? Udaipur-based Medhola brings medical services to your doorstep and has tied up with service providers across the city of Udaipur for non-critical and non-emergency issues like fever, cold, small injuries, etc. Founded by Gaurav Dhakar in 2016, the healthtech startup is particularly useful for the elderly or dependent segment of the population.

Read more

Jaipur-based MeraPatient aims to bring more offline pharma stores online

When Manish Mehta, a CA, and Alok Khandelwal a journalist, decided to start up, they thought of building a product that served society. They realised that despite the profusion of digital healthcare platforms, there wasn’t a single point that brought together all stakeholders in the healthcare system. Enter Jaipur-based MeraPatient, which aims to bring more offline pharma stores online.

Read more

Delivery after delivery, CampusKhana is driving away students’ hunger pangs in Indore’s colleges

Foodtech giants like Zomato and Swiggy can come to your rescue if you are hungry in the city. But what if you are on the outskirts of a small city? Meet CampusKhana, which is driving away students’ hunger pangs in Indore’s colleges. Launched in December 2015 by Amit Ranjan and Monica Dua, this foodtech aggregator started its journey by delivering food to IIM Indore. In the last couple of years, it has diversified into fruits and grocery delivery, and reportedly delivered more than 16,000 orders.

Read more

Jaipur-based HR-tech startup WorkNrBy helps you find job opportunities close to home

Founded by Ashish Agarwal, Pinku Agarwal, and Manu Saxena in 2016, Jaipur-based HR-tech startup WorkNrBy helps you find job opportunities close to home. The platform is tapping the hyperlocal employment opportunity and focuses on small and medium businesses spread across a city. It is free for job seekers, and even for employers in the initial stages.

Read more

Kolkata-based Obo believes on-demand concierge service is the need of the day

In a world where time equals money, Saurav Jhawar and Madhuri Chalke believe on-demand concierge service is the need of the day. Their startup Obo, which works as an on-demand personalised delivery service, offers on-demand delivery, reverse deliveries, and even first and last-mile logistics. Obo’s local delivery network and logistics technology helps merchants deliver to their customers in a cost-effective way.

Read more

Paramotor aims to reach POS solution to small town retailers

Sonia Asher and Rahul Anand decided to tap the huge opportunity to help consumers access their kirana store on a digital platform. Their fintech startup, Paramotor, which was launched in 2016, aims to reach POS solutions to small-town retailers. The omni-channel payment processing platform helps merchants accept payments from customers across all sales channels and devices.

Read more

How MountBlue’s coding bootcamps are aiding entry-level tech hiring in startups

The disconnect between engineers’ skills and employability led Konark Singhal to found MountBlue Technologies, a startup that began operations in Bengaluru in June 2017. Now, MountBlue’s coding bootcamps are aiding entry-level tech hiring in startups. The bootcamps re-skill and upskill engineers to make them ready for employment in tech startups and various high-growth ventures. In a year, MountBlue has had nearly 100 engineers graduate in 10 cohorts.

Read more

As many died in the sector, NOW Delivery turned profitable in hyperlocal delivery, and is expanding

Hyperlocal delivery is a sector where more startups have died than thrived. But Noida-based NOW Delivery turned profitable, and is expanding. Launched in Noida in January 2016 by Vivek Pandey and Bharat Khandelwal, NOW Delivery started as a bike taxi platform. Between lunch and dinner time, it would do hyperlocal food deliveries. Now, it also offers no-delay deliveries for medical needs.

Read more

Ban on crypto assets notwithstanding, WazirX believes the future is in cryptocurrencies

Despite the ban on crypto assets, Mumbai-based WazirX believes the future is in cryptocurrencies. Founded by Nischal Shetty, Siddarth Menon, and Sameer, the idea was clear: to create India’s very own and most trusted crypto assets exchange, enabling Indians to build up their digital portfolio by buying, selling or investing in digital assets. The platform allows people to buy cryptocurrencies through peer-to-peer transfers.

Read more

Forget Facebook, YoBlunt is the next big social network that lets ‘you be you’

In the digital age, people put their best faces forward on social networking sites. But what about the struggles and fears that dog us? Ashish Bais, Manish Bais, and Rishita Varma decided to target this problem With YoBlunt, the next big social network that lets “you be you”. Launched in mid-2017 as an anti-Facebook proposition, this Faridabad-based startup offers a platform restricted to anonymous selfie narration videos only by using patent-pending artificial intelligence (AI) technology.

Read more

How The Sales Talent is finding its niche in placing sales, marketing professionals

When Prasad Tataverty saw that there was no digital platform to exclusively address the requirement of sales and marketing professionals, he decided – in March 2018 – to start up with a jobs site. The Sales Talent is finding its niche in placing sales and marketing professionals. The digital platform acts as a one-stop shop for jobs, career, networking, learning, and mentoring.

Read more

How these 6 IIT alumni are working to take India towards better health

Healthtech startups may be booming, but these 6 IIT alumni are working to take India towards better health. Siddharth Bidwan, Nimish Mehta, Kumar Akarsh, Piyush Singh, Harshal Jain, and Srikanth Manne launched MedLabz, a platform that offers convenient and easy access to diagnostic services; based on test results, it directs patients to specific doctors and specialists. Its predictive AI engine also helps customers adopt healthier lifestyles based on conditions, past ailments, and treatments.

Read more

I like this as Startpreneur Resource.

INDIA EDITION

Disruption is dead. Long live the hyper-scalable
Disruptive innovation has had its day, says Professor of Entrepreneurship Omar Mohout. What businesses need to succeed now is hyperscalability. READ MORE
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PRODUCTIVITY
SO MUCH TO LEARN: HOW TO HACK YOUR BRAIN
Experts say formal education is failing to prepare people for the modern world. Here’s how to harness your secret learning skills.
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TRENDS
EMBRACE AUTOMATION: THE ROBOTS ARE ALRIGHT
The robots are coming to take our jobs – but is that really a bad thing? Find out how automation will transform the way we think about work.
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“Surround yourself with people who think differently to you, who know different things, who come from a different background. Be aware of too much like-mindedness, too much groupthink”
OVERLOADED? YOU NEED TO EMBRACE SOCIAL HEALTH
VOICES
TALENT WITHOUT BORDERS: A BRAVE NEW WORLD
You want to hire the best, no matter where they might be. And in this increasingly global world, geographical borders should be no deterrent.
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VOICES
OVERLOADED? YOU NEED TO EMBRACE SOCIAL HEALTH
We’re more connected than ever before, so why do we feel so isolated? Networking guru Julia Hobsbawm reveals the surprising answer.
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VOICES
PRODUCTIVITY AT WORK: SHARE YOUR VIEWS FOR A CHANCE TO WIN A SMART VOICE ASSISTANT
What makes you more productive in your workspace? Take our five-minute survey and you could win your choice of the latest voice assistants.
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Creativity : Generate new Random Sentences – Get new ideas.

  1. Please wait outside of the house.
  2. If you like tuna and tomato sauce- try combining the two. It’s really not as bad as it sounds.
  3. The shooter says goodbye to his love.
  4. The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
  5. I want more detailed informatio

Creativity brain exercise: Random Sentences generation.

  1. If you like tuna and tomato sauce- try combining the two. It’s really not as bad as it sounds.
  2. How was the math test?
  3. Lets all be unique together until we realise we are all the same.
  4. Hurry!
  5. Should we start class now, or should we wait for everyone to get here?

Story Telling : Lion, Cow and The Master/ Mentor

Why do we need a Master/ Mentor?

Story shared by a friend on WhatsApp this morning.
Once upon a time, a cow went out to graze in the jungle. Suddenly, she noticed a lion racing towards her. She turned and fled, fearing that at any moment the lion would sink his claws into her. The cow desperately looked for someplace to escape and at last, saw a shallow pond. Barely evading the lion’s reach, she jumped into the pond, and in the heat of the chase, the lion blindly leaped after her.

To the surprise of them both, the pond was extremely shallow yet filled with deep recesses of mud. After toppling over each other, the cow and the lion found themselves a short distance apart, stuck in the mud up to their necks. Both had their heads above water but were unable to free themselves no matter how much they writhed.

The lion repeatedly snarled at the cow and roared, “I am going to enjoy the sound of crunching your bones between my teeth!”

He thrashed about in fury but soon became fretful as he found no prospect of escape.

The cow thoughtfully laughed as the lion struggled to free himself and asked him, “Do you have a master?”

The lion disdainfully replied, “I am the king of the jungle. Why do you ask me if I have a master? I myself am the master!”

The cow said, “You may be the king of the jungle, but here all your power has failed to save your life.”

“And what about you?” Retorted the lion. “You are going to die here in this mud too!”’

The cow smiled mildly and said, “No, I am not.”

“If even I, the king of the jungle cannot free myself from this mud”, snapped the lion, “Then how can you, an ordinary cow?”

The cow gently replied, “I cannot free myself from this mud, but my master can. When the sun sets and he finds me absent at home, he will come looking for me. Once he finds me, he will raise me up and escort me home sweet home.”

The lion fell silent and coldly glared at the cow.

Soon enough, the sunset and the cow’s master arrived. He immediately recognized the plight she was in and lifted her to safety. As they walked home, the cow and the master both felt renewed gratitude for one another and pitied the lion they both would have been happy to save if only the lion had allowed them.

The cow represents a surrendered heart, the lion represents an egoistic mind, and the master represents the Guru. The mud represents the world, and the chase represents the struggle for existence therein.
Debrief
Its good to be independent and not rely on anyone. But don’t take it to an extreme, you always need a partner/coach/mentor/ friend who will be always on the lookout for you.

Having them does not mean you are weak, it’s just that you can be stronger with their help.
Make sure to share this story with your partner/coach/mentor/ friend and express your gratitude.

These Random Phrases have come to be a judge for my daily Creative mood like a barometer:)

The Living – An Original Song by Jay Parkhe

The Living

By Jay

An Original Song

I get on with life as a princess,
I’m a smelly kinda person.
I like singing in a choir and breeding guppies.
I like to contemplate the living.
But when I start to daydream,
My mind turns straight to the dead.

Oh oh oh!

Sometimes I look at myself and I look into my eyes,
I notice the way I think about the dead with a smile,
Curved lips I just can’t disguise.
But I think it’s the living making my life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for me to decide which I love more?
The Living or…
The Dead?

I like to use words like ‘crikey’ and ‘twizzle.’
I like to use words about the living.
But when I stop my talking,
My mind turns straight to the dead.

Oh oh oh!

Sometimes I look at myself and I look into my eyes,
I notice the way I think about the dead with a smile,
Curved lips I just can’t disguise.
But I think it’s the living making my life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for me to decide which I love more?
The Living or…
The Dead?

I like to hang out with Wily and Will.
But when left alone,
My mind turns straight to the dead.

Oh oh oh!

Sometimes I look at myself and I look into my eyes,
I notice the way I think about the dead with a smile,
Curved lips I just can’t disguise.
But I think it’s the living making my life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for me to decide which I love more?
The Living or…
The Dead?

I hate losing card games and headless chickens.
But I just think back to the dead,
And I’m happy once again.

Oh oh oh!

How to Mentor Someone Who Doesn’t Know What Their Career Goals Should Be – ICube Media

via How to Mentor Someone Who Doesn’t Know What Their Career Goals Should Be – ICube Media

Friedrich Nietzsche On The Secret Ingredient For Happiness

The idea that happiness-maximization is the criterion one should use in deciding what to do and how to act has probably been the most popular ethical view throughout history.

In opposition, Nietzsche insists that happiness should not be your goal.

For example, in his magnum opus — Thus Spoke Zarathustra — his protagonist declares:

“Do I strive after happiness? [No,] I strive after my works!”
And in Twilight of the Idols, he explicitly states that:

“Man [should] not strive after happiness.”
At this point, any philosopher worth his salt asks: “But what exactly does Nietzsche mean when he says these things?”

via Friedrich Nietzsche On The Secret Ingredient For Happiness

Mentors’s Dementors – Brainfogged ?

Are you in search of a brain fog treatment? Well, I embarked on my own personal journey to learn more about the pros and cons of consuming gluten. I ran across a common theme: clouding of the mind. It is also known conventionally as mental fog or “brain fog,” due to the consumption of foods containing gluten. Conversely, I found that many who were omitting gluten from their diets, either voluntarily or on a physician’s recommendation, noted improvements in memory and mental clarity. If you’ve ever put your car keys in the freezer by mistake, looked for your car in the wrong section of the parking lot, or simply couldn’t think clearly for seemingly no reason at all, you may be able to relate.

Often chalked up to a “normal part of getting older,” symptoms of brain fog include mild confusion, forgetfulness and/or the inability to think clearly. But this doesn’t have to be your fate!

Certain foods such as artificial sweeteners and dairy have been linked to mental fog. However, more and more physicians are discovering that mental fog is quite strongly linked to gluten intolerance. Within weeks of eliminating gluten from my own diet, I noticed an ability to think more clearly.

Luckily, there are several foods that have been associated with improved cognitive performance that are naturally gluten free. Tired of losing your keys? Here are six foods you can reach for to clear up mental fog and boost your brain health:

Foods for Brain Fog Treatment
1. Avocados: Avocado is high in oleic acid. This fatty acid that plays a role in protecting neurons. Along with other omega fatty acids, oleic acid helps make up the myelin sheath. This lining on neurons helps information in your brain travel at speeds of up to 200 miles per hour. Avocados also increase healthy blood flow which promotes increased brain function. It also improves heart health. For an effective brain fog treatment, throw some avocado on your salad or spread some on your sandwich and super charge your brain for those holiday events.

2. Blueberries: Also called “brainberries” by Dr. Steven Platt, MD author of Superfoods Rx: Fourteen Foods Proven to Change Your Life, blueberries have one of the highest antioxidant capacities of all fruits and vegetables. They are known to improve memory and cognitive function. Blueberries have memory-protecting properties. They have even been associated with the prevention of Alzheimer’s disease. Add some blueberries to your breakfast and you may not need to check that to-do list several times throughout the day.

3. Beans: Not only are beans wallet-friendly, they also help stabilize blood sugar levels. They slow how your body processes carbohydrates. Our brains need a steady stream of energy and beans do the job. By adding more beans to your diet, you add some carb-like texture to your meals without consuming any gluten.

4. Nuts and seeds: One ounce a day can reduce inflammation and promote brain fog treatment. They provide you with a great source of protein and satisfy your appetite. In addition to having a high fiber content, nuts and seeds are packed with vitamins, minerals, and brain-boosting omega fats. They have a positive impact on your brain and heart health. For an easy snack on-the-go, reach for almonds, walnuts, pistachios, sunflower seeds and pumpkin seeds (pumpkin seeds are specifically beneficial for men).

5. Wild Salmon: High levels of omega-3 fatty acids in addition to astaxanthin, B vitamins, and amino acids make wild salmon a winner for improving cognitive function. There is a wealth of research supporting omega 3’s role in brain health preservation. B vitamins and amino acids boost everyday brain function.

6. Dark chocolate: The powerful antioxidant properties of dark chocolate and natural stimulants help enhance focus. They also improve concentration and stimulate the production of endorphins. These help to not only support brain health, but improve mood, too. One to two Hershey Kiss-size pieces of dark chocolate a day will provide all the benefits you need. So, don’t feel guilty reaching for that piece of dark chocolate. It will help you think more clearly and cheer you up.

Sources:

http://www.livestrong.com/article/333669-foods-that-cause-brain-fog/
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stress
http://www.webmd.com/diet/features/eat-smart-healthier-brain
http://www.webmd.com/diet/features/eat-smart-healthier-brain?page=2

via Brain Fog Treatment: 6 Foods That Clear Brain Fog | Live in the Now

The Ultimate Dream

Where do we want to b?.

What is our desired place we see?

What is the Ultimate Place we wish to be?

A Dreamer knows Inside OUT and Outside IN!

We do tend to forget the dream and live life

Going with the flow,

mostly aimlessly.

Dreams give us Purpose, Goals, Ambitions, and Aims – albeit sub-consciously.

Mentors are awakener and constantly hammer, chisel, sculpt the mouldable Mentees/  into their Actionable Plans, often as Accountability Partners with joint responsibility.

Isn’t it your idea too that you can have a thriving business built on helping people and improving the world the ultimate dream?

It’s possible.

In case you didn’t know – the Personal Development/ Life Coaching/ Mentoring Industry is not just about feeling good.

According to Wikipedia and Psychology Today, this is a more than $11 Billion dollar industry – and growing.

It is Growing at a rapid pace and will continue to always help more lives with their positive impact – the question we should be asking ourself isn’t, ‘Can I be successful at this?’ …

it’s ‘How big of a mark do I want to make?’, and

‘What am I willing to do to make it happen?”

There is no limit to the amount of income or the satisfaction you can gain from teaching people how to unleash their unlimited potential and awaken their latent dreams.

I’ve been studying why people do what they do for nearly half a century.  .

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

Dealing with perceptions

in my mind’s eyes

hoping against hope

my presuppositions

my cognitive bias

my hyper criticism brutally

and honestly delivered

Reacted fiercely

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

Interpreted differently

Forgetting all the time

There could be another way

May be it means something else

Meanings, judgements passed

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

Forgetting our Being Human!

The tendencies to err

To become ruthless

Behave unnaturally with vengeance

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

In the meaningless repetitive

Arguments to prove us Right

Leaving sanity, wisdom

Ignoring subtle visible facts

Getting self centred

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

To prove I’m always right

No remorse, no feelings and

Emotions towards others

No empathy no sympathy

Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

Being mean before we know it

Mean machines we become

And wonder

Mean machine or

Meaning making Machine –

who am I ?

Is that me?

Who have I become

A Moron, a sadist

A masochist

Or just Mean machine or Meaning making Machine – who am I ?

(Writing poetry after many years! It needs a deep provocation, a shining up a mentors huge stick! And it just flowed)

Why Getting Out Of Your Comfort Zone Is Overrated. Good article on Medium. Test yourself on 5 assessments.

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)

via Why Getting Out Of Your Comfort Zone Is Overrated – Personal Growth – Medium

Decide First! Right or wrong comes later

Diamond is merely a Lump …

Today’s Inspirational Quote:

“A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.”

— Author Unknown

I was reading an article

From Ashes To Ashes To Diamonds: A Way To Treasure The Dead . It is very interesting ! It talks about “From Ashes To Ashes To Diamonds: A Way To Treasure The Dead””

Most of the diamonds synthesized from cremated remains come out blue, due to trace amounts of boron in the body. These diamonds, made from the ashes of animals, were created through the same process used to make diamonds from human remains.

I once said to a mentee that you are a Raw Diamond and a good mentor can turn you into a Masterpiece.  I mentioned 3 different cuts Indian Cut vs Belgium Cut vs Russian Cut which is given to the Raw Diamond. 
  1. Where a stone is cut has no more relation to the quality of the cut. At least not in what is observable in the finished product. There definitely still is a difference in yield, but that is only of concern for the manufacturer.
  2. The difference in cut-quality depends upon the goals and the organisation of the manufacturer. The cutting might be anywhere in the world for that matter. Therefore, you can still find very nicely cut Russian-cuts, a growing percentage of high quality Indian-cuts and in bigger stones, still more than Gary thinks, mostly Belgian-cut stones.
  • Pre Glasnost Russians cut by the text book with little regard for yield. Russian was the best cut.
  • Belgium has very little cutting today – some is very good – most is pre prepared and sent to Asia for finishing.
  • A few years back all Indian and most Israel diamonds were sold thru Belgium as Belgian Cut – or the better cut stones as Russian Cut.
  • Today it does not matter much as there are terrible and beautiful diamonds cut everywhere. Buy the diamond and not the location – that is the best advice.

Same things almost apply to the Mentor who becomes the Sculptor for the Masterpiece or the Diamond cutter improving the 4C Qualities of the Diamonds and bringing out their inner FIRE and increasing the yield by cuts so that the Weight gives the desired price to the seller.

Sometimes, though it gives me the feeling that the Mentees are not finally CARBON so essential for making of a Diamond but are made of a brittle, fragile sandstone which can only be crushed to make sand and used in the plinth of a building and NOT Diamond. The death wish of the mentee, in such cases to be a masterpiece can only be fulfilled if the building architect designs and makes it the world’s best – otherwise it remains another mundane structure.

To me personally, Mentoring is both art and science.  There are thousands of approaches and there would be million mentors in the world each monopolising their own tricks of the trade and techniques and approaches.  I just focused on 11 of them and practiced them for 20 years.  It does not make me a diamond ! or even diamond material ready for the cuts.  The mentor leaves behind the legacy of mentees who when they do well – the mentor becomes PUREST FORM OF CARBON and may not require any polish – just the basic things they do to be the Blue Diamond preserved by some as their Dead.  That would be my last wish! 

WOW! 88.8 ! No its not Poker Win but it is a Win all the same. May make me a Diet Mentor now.

So Congratulations to me.  The credit for this goes to my loving wife and family and my Doctors who did not let me waver like true mentors for one moment from my goal. They set three big strategic targets for me after my 2 heart attacks

  1. Get to 68Kg – your weight when you married 38 years ago and present a Jay as he was to your wife.  Motivating but tough.
  2. Second Get to Under 90 Kg before May 2018 and maintain the weight.
  3. Come to 80 Kilos by 31st July and you will have nearly Reversed your Heart disease by strict medical management, Walking as the only exercise other than some breating Yoga exercises and Extremely strict Dietary conrols and managemnt.

 

I like to MEASURE.  Without measuring nothing is achieved.  I used different Apps for Walking measurement, Steps measurement, Weight measurement, BP measurement, Sugar measurement

Without Documentation of what you do, you can not prove as people are interested to have an EMPIRICAL (sic !) EVIDENCE that what you claim is true..  So I maintained a journal in which i record all the above and my Insulin dosage plus I also record EPISODES such as the number of times I fell down, Number of times I ate out, No. of days on travel, No. of issues – fractured hand, Arthritis, Frozen shoulder, Extreme sweating etc as told to maintain by my Great Doctors who are now friends.  Without their help it was not possible.

Look at these pics – Before and After. This was ME in August 2007 when TNT CEO visited India and I had just returned from Tirupati after a headshave and a Darshan. I weighed a good 135 Kilos then and was ready for a Heart Attack.  I had stopped all forms of Alcohol in 2006 beginning and stopped Non-vegetarian food much before that by I was still eating lots of namkins and salted, fried peanuts and was smoking to glory as a chainsmoker.

dp Aut 2008As Diabetes was detected in 2006, I was put on Tablets and No Sugar, Minimal Salt food and I had reduced my food intake by about 20% overall without of course stopping the peanuts and snacks which put my blood sugar out of control and the Doctor to comment – other than your Kidneys everything seems wrong and you are waiting for a silent heart attack soon.  I changed the doctor though, as he was mostly abroad and was not guiding me correctly and I was left to the mercy of his wire thin dietician who had run out of ideas about giving me recipe’s as none of her 20 recipe’s worked.
dp july 2007 Weight drop after diabetes was not very significant but I managed to get the photographer to get this shot so I look thinner in the picture atleast with a french beard or a ‘goatee”.  🙂 I still weighed 132 Kilos in July 2008

The below picture is when I was honoured as an Honorary Professor of SIBM Pune, Bangalore by the Chairman of Symbiosis Dr. Muzumdar.  I was donating all the honorarium earned adding something from my own for their library.  Did so from 2000 to 2014.

June 2010 and I still weighed 135 Kilos as you can see from the pic below. DP June 2010

The picture below is 6 months after my 2 quick silent heart attacks of which one was noticed in Feb 14 by Symbiosis students and I was admitted to Narayana Hrudayalaya of the world famous Dr. Devi Shetty.  My Weight 108 Kg. August 2014.  When admitted the famed doctor said it is a case requiring triple bypass but your heart pumps at 15% and it is not feasible to operate. They did PET Scan and other tests and put me in ICCU for 8 days which were very boring with hospital diet food and smells and nauseating atmosphere . Two great things happened. 1. I stopped snoring 2. I stopped smoking thereafter. cropped-dp-barcode-with-tagline.jpeg

Dr. Shetty also advised me to meet the HOD of Endocrinology and now my friend Dr. Satish Kumar for putting me on Insulin, his medication and diet controls.

I was very reluctant to take insulin. Wanted to hire a nurse or go to a hospital to get injected as I would relate it to 14 injections in the stomach thing which was a fear I had about the dog bite.  Although I had a pet dog in my childhood called Tomy but I was very afraid of injections in the stomach.  But I changed my fears and went on with treatment.

Next came diet. After 2 – 4 changes of dieticians opinions Dr. Satish asked me to cut food intake to a total of 20% of what I was eating before the Episodes and my wife would listen to his advice intently and make me accept and adapt to this extremely strictly.  She maintained my food timings, quantity and watched for my excesses I would indulge on my walks etc. and added couple of juices = White gourd and fresh Grass juice to my morning breakfast.  Daughter pitched in with her client’s Sericha Tea with lunch and dinner and another daughter suggested Figs to reduce cholestrol with breakfast.

All in all I was in good hands = well disciplined, well monitored and controlled.

Weight 135 Kg.jayparkhe2028729 copy 2Dec2011

My only task was to Walk. I had started short walks post retirement in the morning and evening.  Dr. Satish motivated me to increase it periodically.  So from 2.5Km a day I have come to average 12.5 Km per day this year.  In April I crossed 10000Km on the Nike Apps meant for runners but I measured my Km walked.

All of this worked.  Then this year I realised I sleep a lot in the day time some times 2 to 6 hours as sisesta.  My weight touched on April 9 2018 98 Kilos and I was told to stop sleeping in the noon and instead walk for about 2 Km in the Sun.  It started showing results.

Post my birthday, I fitted into Readymade Slim fit Jeans after many many years and you can see the delight on my face. But I still had to go to the next target level. dp april 9 I weighe today and my Cuttent Weight 88,8kg.  For past 15 days it has been in the range of 89 to 90 kilos.  I think I am going to achieve the 80 kilo target by the due date doing what I am doing. It is working. 

So personally, it is a bigger victory than a Poker victory as even if you win 10 Million or 1- billion you can spend it all but you can not reverse the heart disease and earn more years to live with your family and friends.  My personal gratitude to all who helped.

To end, I had a brief Mentoring intervention of 60 days with a mentee and I once shared a joke with her to say ” Jaane Kiski mentoring karta firta hai,  iska wazan 5 Kilo ghat gaya hai” – it was a rigorous mentoring assignment and what this meant is “Don’t know who he mentors or what he does but his weight has gone down by 5 Kilos” So perhaps she also deserves kudos for being with me in that crucial period of losing weight and helping me achieve my target.

So next is 80.0 Kilos by 31st July. 🙂

 

Dedicated to Mentees who quit or Cracked!

I wrote an article some time ago, about the 11 mentoring approaches I used and then found that there are many many more Mentoring approaches I do not know about. I was especially inspired by this video I found on YouTube that talks about 5 1/2 Mentors which this Basketball player found in his lifetime which are so precious and way better than my 11 approached.

I dedicate this article and urge especially the Mentees whom I dropped, who quit, or who Cracked under the KickAss Mentor’s pressures and Strict Coach Talk/ writings. They may still have a chance to move up in life as all is not lost. I loved this video. Sharing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quhcyPpCaSk

I read somewhere that Mentors appear when the Pupils are ready but as a Skeptic I believe that Mentors come for :

a. A Reason

b. A Season or

c. For Life as a life coach.

I know the amount of pressure, I exert on mentees is so unbearable that The Reason sometimes changes to Treason 🙂 and mentees begin Reverse Mentoring – as they believe Jay is such an inferior guy – we can coach and mentor him better !

The Season may last for a Quarter, Half year or 4-5 years and then as the Mentees learn to find mentors for their Augmented needs and Augmented wants of their businesses, their personal motivations – Jay Parkhe takes a back seat willing. That’s when the SEASONING and ripening of the Mentees begin. jay calls it WEAN to WIN approach.

Some Mentees keep in touch as they believe they have formed a bond which is life long and they keep in touch at their will and for them it is ATM – Any time mentoring where the phonelines, emails, whatsApp or SMS never shut. They reach you on Social media complimenting, commenting, sharing, agreeing, disagreeing, congratulating and sharing sad moments together.

Mentoring does all of this. It can display in a simple limp handshake with a sweaty but cold palm that the person is Selfish, will turn ungrateful, ingrate but the good mentors persist as they believe in the power to reform. No one can change and adult. Only adults can transform themselves and change. As you can see in this video as well. Jay has met several Ex-Cons who came for advice, Reformed, became part of this world by giving up all their bad deeds, negative influences, negative people surrounding them by building a strong fort in their minds to counter them and Jay takes pride in helping them build and reinforce every strong wall, trench and tunnel and their Big Guns!

Such is the pleasure of Mentoring. Enjoy the video. I found it very inspiring.

JayParkhe’s Mentor MasterClass takes off on meetup dot com. Welcome to 28 First Day Joinees.

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Join us even if you are not in Bengaluru. We propose to have Webinars for outstation joinees and of course the One on One calls are for both.

Mentor Masterclasses by Jay Parkhe for Startpreneurs, SMEs (Bangalore, India)
My new Meetup just launched! Join Professional Mentor for Startpreneurs and C Level aspirantsDear Mentor MasterClassMates,I welcome you to this Meet up. I…
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