Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that’s it… Don’t waste time on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; its like saying you extend life of a car by driving faster. Want to live longer?
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Fruit very good. Brandy distilled wine, that means they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Grain good too.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can’t think of one, sorry.
My philosophy: No pain…good!
Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil.
How getting more vegetable be bad?
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable!
It best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure,
explain whale to me.
Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! ‘Round’ is also a shape!
Well… I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
Finally the Japanese Doctor summed up: Look mister, Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways – Beer in one hand – chocolate in the other – body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO-HOO, what a ride my life was”!!!!!😂
My friend who loves an undisciplined life and enjoys his drinks is in love with this Japanese Doctor it seems.
Its a WhatsApp forward. No offence is meant to any of my japanese Doctor friends.
Talent Quarterly Extras
01 JULY 2018Three Reasons HR Transformations Fail (and how to make sure yours doesn’t)
Our experience shows that it’s not the usual suspects – troublesome technology implementations, challenging budgets, etc. – that undermine the success of HR transformations. The real culprits are both softer and far more controllable. That’s good news because it means that you can overcome these obstacles and ensure a faster, more effective transformation.
You’ll move faster and more successfully through your HR transformation if you execute these three steps:
Clarify the Vison: We describe how Kurt Lewin’s basic change model shows HR leaders where to focus more effort.
Increase Talent Quality: To adapt a Marshall Goldsmith quote, those who got you here won’t get you there.
Move Faster: While haste makes waste, needless delays make HR leaders seem replaceable.
Read the article here.
It’s a word that gets thrown around a lot, and rarely understood. What is purpose? What does it mean to have a life purpose? First of all purpose means that we are devoted to something GREATER than ourselves.
GREATER than surviving and making money.
GREATER than looking good to other people.
Having a purpose means we are connected to something that will last beyond our death.
Purpose is a force of nature for a worthy cause that makes a real difference in the world – and only we can decide what that is.
The funny thing is – power of purpose becomes most obvious when we LOSE our PURPOSE.
We become like ships adrift at sea, unsure of where we are going.
Without clear purpose, we become susceptible to falling off the path.
Without a purpose, things seem to stop mattering.
Nihilism takes hold.
We begin to make bad choices.
Who cares if we eat burgers and stop meditating? Nothing matters anyway!
Who cares if we show up 100% for our family? It’s not a big deal!
Feel like giving up on the things we are working on? Oh well!
These are the kind of things that we begin doing when we have lost sight of our purpose.
And still, when we HAVE PURPOSE, we become much more resilient.
In fact, it’s been shown that people who have a purpose can sustain much more pain.
Purpose acts as an analgesic that helps us persevere in the face of difficulty. That’s a complex of way of saying that purpose is a pain killer.
If we are connected to our purpose – we won’t mind putting in the extra hours of work needed to get things handled.
If we have a purpose, we won’t be thrown off by a little argument or someone being rude to us – because we are connected to that higher purpose and the small stuff doesn’t matter.
Knowing our purpose – and letting it inspire usf to the greatest heights of your potential.
“Baba remarked, “If Gandhi comes to meet me, it would be very good for him and good for all concerned.”
About the Round Table Conference, Baba explained to Chanji and Rustom:
Even Gandhi will have no influence there, in spite of his presence. He should have gone at first with other representatives who, in a wavering mood, left for Multan; but at that time, Gandhi hesitated on account of certain grievances. Then he suddenly agreed to participate in the conference, though most of their grievances were not redressed.
The point is that once Gandhi refused to join in the conference on certain grounds, he ought to have refused to the end. He should not have suddenly consented to take part in it unless and until all his grievances were redressed and removed, and he should have stayed in India. But being inconsistent, he consented to attend the conference at the eleventh hour. He has lost his prestige and now he won’t succeed there. At the Round Table Conference, differences of opinion will prevail among the parties and no one will agree, and Gandhi’s influence will not make a difference. His influence will be ineffectual.
“Why?” asked Chanji.
In reply, Baba spelled out:
Gandhi’s influence has already waned. He wants to keep every party pleased and there[in] lies his weakness. How could he keep everybody pleased when they all are opposed to one another and have conflicting views, extremely opposite to each other?
In India, the many political parties and creeds all have one common aim: to attain independence. But there is not a single party among them who can come to terms with another party about details. Even the [Indian National] Congress, the party considered strongest, is affected by the foul odor of religious differences.
Its influence on others is gradually failing. With the weakening of its influence, the influence of Gandhi is also waning. Not only are the two greatest and largest parties and communities, the Muslims and the Untouchables, out of the influence of the Congress, but they also oppose and fight tooth and nail against Gandhi and the Congress.
Even among his own followers, or those who at least agree with him on the question of independence, their objectives differ. Observe how Sarojini Naidu and Pandit Malaviya act. Gandhi preaches the use of khadi [handspun cotton cloth] to all and sundry, yet Mrs. Naidu wears silks, though she is a colleague in his fight for independence. Gandhi preaches and advocates the abolition of caste and religion, particularly in abolishing Untouchability, and his lieutenant in the Congress Party, Malaviya, does not adhere to it. Malaviya takes his cook to England with him, thinking that eating meals prepared by foreigners is irreligious. There are thousands in the Congress who do not accept this dictum of Gandhi’s at all, and that is why the party is not strong; the result of which will bode ill for the future.
Gandhi also advocates celibacy, though he himself is married and has children, and recently he arranged his son’s marriage. There are so many things like these which he recommends, but does not put into practice himself. Why preach such things which he himself can’t or won’t do?
It is this trait in his character, combined with two other great defects — vanity and inconsistency — which causes Gandhi to lose his influence gradually, and leads those who once admired him to oppose him today. Shaukat Ali was once Gandhi’s closest companion and he is now his staunchest opponent. Why? Because of that great dividing factor: the religious animosity and enmity between the Hindus and Muslims. The religious fanatics on both sides have nurtured and fostered this hatred to the extent that even in Congress there are the orthodox who color every political activity and action with their religious bigotry, and it is all authorized, approved and practiced by and with Gandhi. This leads to great antagonism which is now weakening the Congress party.
What can I say about [Gandhi’s] vanity? Too much of a thing always spoils a man. To raise one to the seventh heaven and to cry out “Mahatma Gandhi ki jai” has made him vain and brought him down.
Shaukat Ali has caustically remarked, “These things have gone to his head and made him [Gandhi] mad!”
Besides, his immediate attendants put up a great show and fuss in every activity, which shows that Gandhi has a taste for it. But it is the natural outcome of too much praise and adulation. This daily exhibition in all functions, public and private, has reached the limit. It is too prominent to conceal from a shrewd observer or a sincere soul, who never likes or desires such a show. Hence, there is the dislike of him by many who, in spite of their admiration for him at one point, have left and are leaving him in [droves].
The Perfect Master of Spirituality can do anything and everything. He can preach about things which he himself does not practice, and for his spiritual purposes he can do things according to the prevailing conditions and circumstances, because he is eternally free of all things and can undo their effects. This is something an imperfect person can never do, much less one who has no “wind” [breeze] even of spirituality [such as a political leader, like Gandhi].
The reactionary effects of all these preachings, fuss, sham, show and vanity are disastrous, causing a gradual erosion of any influence Gandhi has among his admirers and followers, however great. If Gandhi’s influence goes, the rise of youth will take place, which in its activity will resemble Russian communalism. The signs are already there, as we find them assassinating people in high places and assaulting them in broad daylight.
Although Jawaharlal [Nehru] sides with Gandhi in his objective for independence, his views, creed and activities are quite different from Gandhi’s.
On the 5th, regarding Britain, Baba said:
The British government will not grant anything more than what was settled on in the last Round Table Conference. There is a change of government and, except for [Prime Minister] MacDonald, no one has any sympathy for our cause. Gandhi, too, will not gain anything more by his presence than what has already been decided to be given. His personality and influence will have no effect at all. And if Gandhi tries to give in again to avoid a conflict, the Congress will not accept it.
Baba predicted a civil war erupting in India between Hindus and Muslims. “There will be a terrible massacre and slaughter of one another,” he stated. “It will also have its reflection on Europeans.
There will be an equally strong civil war between the Indians and foreigners, particularly the Europeans and more particularly the British.”
On the 7th, Baba said:
The common cause of nationalism and the objective of achieving independence are sacrificed for want of unity between the Hindus and the Mohammedans, and they are harming their own cause by bringing religion into the matter. No one understands religion, and all this strife and squabble is born of irreligiousness.
Gandhi, who goes to England as the chosen leader of the Congress and the spokesman for India, this time will have no influence, unfortunately, owing to various reasons of conflicting ideals and party politics. Not only will his influence fail with the British people, but his influence will fall considerably even with his own people, the Indians, to the extent of failure. And with Gandhiji’s influence gone, and “communalism” coming in, civil war will follow.
This is all very sad for poor India and for Britain, too. But sadder times are still to come before the sun of the New Era of peace and prosperity dawns on the world, for such is ordained.”
Revised Lord Meher, pp. 1237-1240, copyright AMBPPCT
photo: Meher Baba, 1931
copyright Meher Nazar Publications or MSI Collection
Censorship is a big deal in China, where the government has made it clear that it will go to any length to control information. The Chinese government strictly controls news spread through the Internet and mass media, consequently deciding what its citizens know and what they do not.
Several Western companies—including Google and Facebook—have either left or been banned in China over censorship and privacy issues, leaving Chinese-owned companies that the government can easily manipulate in their place.
Away from the Internet, China has also banned several other weird things—usually for ridiculous reasons. Although the government often says otherwise, most of the items on this list were banned for political reasons.
Hip-hop songs and hip-hop artists with tattoos are prohibited in China. The ban was issued through the State Administration of Press, Publication, Radio, Film and Television (SAPPRFT), which stated that hip-hop artists had refused to toe the line of the ruling Chinese Communist Party (CCP).
SAPPRFT ruled that media agencies must not feature artists who use vulgar or “tasteless” lyrics and artists whose “heart and morality” differ from that of the ruling CCP. Additionally, the artists must neither be classless nor questionable.
Weeks before the ban was issued, two popular Chinese hip-hop artists, Wang Hao (stage name “PG One”) and Zhou Yan (stage name “GAI”) had been sanctioned for what the government called “bad behavior” and use of lyrics that were not aligned with the ideology of the CCP. PG One was also accused of using lyrics that insulted women and promoted drug use.
Films and television shows depicting time travel have been disallowed in China since April 2011. The government stated that the ban was necessary because movies depicting time travel are often historically inaccurate and filled with feudalism, superstition, and reincarnation, all of which are capable of distorting and insulting the history of China.
The ban came at a time when time travel films were gaining popularity. Their plots often involved people teleporting from modern China to ancient China. The events in the fictional ancient China were usually modeled after real events that happened in ancient China but with some exaggerations. The government fears that this could alter citizens’ opinions of the past.
Around June 8, 2017, several Chinese blogs and social media accounts that were focused on celebrity gossip mysteriously disappeared from the Chinese web. It was later revealed that they had been shut down on the orders of the government. Apparently, the government had called representatives of several big Chinese Internet companies to a meeting and had given them a list of 60 blogs and social media accounts it wanted shut down.
According to the government, the ban was necessary because the blogs and social media accounts were of “poor taste” and did not promote “socialist values.” The shutdown was surprising to many Internet users because the government had often left sports and entertainment news uncensored.
China has banned reincarnation. That is, people who claim to be back from the dead. Anyone who wants to be reincarnated or claims to have been reincarnated needs to seek approval from the government and follow the rules as listed by the Chinese State Administration for Religious Affairs.
Despite its hilariousness, the prohibition has very real religious and political undertones. It is targeted at all Tibetan Buddhists, specifically the Dalai Lama, the spiritual and political leader of the Tibetan people and followers of Tibetan Buddhism.
Tibet used to be an independent country. Then, over five decades ago, China invaded and added the country to its territory. The Dalai Lama fled Tibet for India, where he still holds sway over Tibetans.
They believe that the Dalai Lama is capable of reincarnation after death. Considering that the current Dalai Lama is already old, a successor is bound to be appointed within the next few years or decades. By controlling who can be reincarnated, China will be able to decide who becomes the Dalai Lama. When this happens, it will be able to bring all Tibetans and Tibetan Buddhists under state control.
Even if the Dalai Lama decides to be reincarnated among Tibetans outside China (maybe in India or the United States), China could refuse to recognize that Dalai Lama. It could even appoint another Dalai Lama from the Tibetan population in China, leaving Tibetans with two Dalai Lamas. This will inevitably cause disagreement and confusion among Tibetans.
No pun intended, puns are banned in China. They are commonly used on the Chinese Internet and media where Chinese words, characters, phrases, and idioms are slightly adjusted to give them different meanings. The government claimed that the ban was necessary because puns eroded Chinese culture and could mislead people (especially kids) or cause what it called “cultural and linguistic chaos.”
However, it is known that the ban was not intended to preserve Chinese culture or prevent whatever the government meant by “cultural and linguistic chaos.” Rather, it was intended to stop Internet users from using puns to bypass Internet censorship and mock the government.
In March 2018, the China National People’s Congress voted to expunge the law that limited the president’s rule to two five-year terms. This is believed to be the first step in President Xi Jinping’s attempt to rule China for life. The government had kept all preparations under wrap and only hinted of the proposed amendment two weeks earlier.
Some citizens opposed the proposed amendment and openly criticized it on social media. Many compared China to North Korea and used the phrase “I disagree” to show their disapproval. That continued until the government banned the phrase. Internet users who made posts containing “I disagree” got an error message in return.
Besides “I disagree,” the government also banned ”migration,” “boarding a plane,” “life-long rule,” “long live the emperor,” and Animal Farm. Animal Farm is the name of the popular novel by George Orwell, while “boarding a plane” is similar to a Chinese phrase meaning “ascending the throne”—as in Xi Jinping was trying to become king.
The Chinese government banned Winnie-the-Pooh after it realized that its citizens were comparing the fictional character to President Xi Jinping. Due to Internet censorship, Chinese citizens are unable to use certain words on the Internet. So they often find creative ways to bypass censorship and use these words. One method is by using different words or characters to represent people and events. For President Xi Jinping, it was Pooh.
When a picture of Xi Jinping shaking hands with Shinzo Abe, Japan’s prime minister, surfaced on the Internet, Chinese citizens responded with pictures of Pooh shaking hands with Eeyore the donkey. When another picture showing Xi Jinping popping his head out of his presidential limousine surfaced, the people responded with a picture of Pooh popping his head out of a toy car.
The ban was not the first time that pictures of Pooh were prohibited on the Chinese Internet. Earlier, a ban came because the Chinese Communist Party was preparing for a congress and there were concerns that more questionable pictures of Pooh might pop up.
China disallowed livestreaming after realizing that it could not be censored like other online content. This wasn’t the reason the government gave, though. They stated that the prohibition was necessary to clean the Chinese Internet. The ban was issued in June 2017 and was targeted at Sina Weibo, China’s equivalent of Twitter, and Ifeng and AcFun, two video sharing sites similar to YouTube.
Livestreaming was gaining popularity at the time of the ban and involved unusual technologies that the government was not used to censoring. For instance, in 2016, Ifeng livestreamed the US presidential election, something the Chinese government would not have ordinarily allowed. So they just instituted the ban while they worked on censorship.
The letter “n,” the innocent 14th letter of the English alphabet, was another unfortunate victim of China’s censorship. The ban came after China announced its plans to remove the two-term limit for president.
In mathematics, the Chinese use the letter “n” the same way we use the letter “x.” So “n” stands for unknown or infinity. Chinese citizens were using the letter to denote the number of years that Xi Jinping will remain in power. However, the government probably realized that the letter “n” had other uses and lifted the ban a day later.
China categorizes itself as an atheist nation. Although it prefers that its citizens remain atheists, the government claims to allow freedom of religion. However, serving and retired members of the ruling Chinese Communist Party are banned from having a religion. They cannot get involved in religious activities and are expected to act against certain religions like the Falun Gong, which the government categorizes as an evil cult.
The so-called freedom of religion is a sham because the state strictly regulates religions, decides how they operate, and bans them when it suspects they are acting against its goals. The government also regulates religious books, traditions, and methods and places of worship. It does not hesitate to ban them when necessary. For instance, churches require state approval to operate.
The government also holds a monopoly over the distribution of Bibles, determines who becomes a church leader, and regulates Christian holidays. The government used to be lax about its monopoly over the distribution of Bibles until recently. Then it started clamping down on the online sales of Bibles.
China does not allow the Vatican to independently appoint Catholic bishops in their country, either. Rather, the government negotiates with the Vatican to determine who can become a bishop. At one time, the Chinese government even banned Christmas.
Muslims are not treated any better. The government has banned Muslim names, dress styles, and traditions. Muslim women cannot wear burkas, and men cannot have beards. Parents cannot give their children Islamic names, either.
In 2017, China banned Muslim civil servants from fasting during Ramadan, the Islamic month when Muslims are expected to fast. It even stationed guards at government buildings all day and night to ensure that the ban was enforced.
The government also demanded that students in Muslim-majority regions watch communist films and engage in sports on Fridays, just to stop them from fasting and participating in joint community prayers that are held on Fridays. China also has strict guidelines to determine who performs hajj, an annual pilgrimage to Mecca, Saudi Arabia. The government demands that any Muslim who wants to make the hajj pilgrimage must be between 50 and 70 and must pledge allegiance to the government.
I never thought, I would have any followers or BFFFs as I have come to call my readers – The Best Friends, Followers and Fans! I love them and their comments and likes. I like to read their blogs and like and comment.
For a short while when I reached a 360 number, I added a blog one of my mentees made and made me an Admin. While setting it up I don’t know what I did – all 360 were migrated to her blog and I was at ZERO ! WOW – WordPress, I said. But soon, I withdrew as Admin as she appointed social media interns to manage her blog but the followers and friends and fans did not return.
I said, OK. So be it ! But after about 10 days or so as I see 400 or you back – I feel so deeply grateful to you all – let me say a BIG THANK YOU !
This question makes me cringe. It’s not that I don’t want to help. I do — I really do. It’s just that when someone asks me to be their mentor, I don’t know what I’m signing up for. The question feels like a marriage proposal from someone I’ve never met, an indefinite labor contract with unspecified terms of service, and a giant pile of responsibility on an already full plate.
But I understand where people are coming from. We’ve been spoon-fed the idea that finding a mentor is a prerequisite for success. Countless business books and self-help guides preach the importance of a good mentor. Under this image we have nurtured, a mentor takes a mentee under their wing, like Socrates and Plato, Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg, and Mr. Miyagi and Daniel. The relationship then blossoms, and the mentee achieves philosophical greatness, makes billions, or wins the All Valley Karate Championship.
I hate to be a buzzkill, but this isn’t how things work in real life. We wait for a good mentor to arrive like a prophet, whisk us from our canyon of despair, and push us up the ladder of success. But that mentor often doesn’t come, at least not in the form that we’re expecting. We then use the lack of a mentor as an excuse for not getting started.
The solution to this quandary appears in a scene in Good Will Hunting, one of my favorite movies. In the scene, Sean McGuire, the therapist played by Robin Williams, asks Matt Damon’s genius character, Will Hunting, if he has a soulmate—someone who challenges him.
After some meandering, Will replies: “I got plenty. Shakespeare, Nietzsche, Frost, O’Connor, Kant, Pope, Locke.” Sean mocks this answer: “That’s great. They’re all dead.” Undeterred, Will says: “Not to me, they’re not.”
Will is on to something. We assume our soulmates and sources of inspiration have to be real-life mentors who are a quick phone call or an email away. But that assumption is false. As Elizabeth Gilbert writes, mentors “live on the shelves of your library; they live on the walls of museums; they live in recordings made decades ago.”
No one has taught me more about democracy than the Czech writer and politician Vaclav Havel. He’s not alive. No one has taught me more about writing than Stephen King. I’ve never met him. No one has taught me more about humility than the Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius. He’s been fertilizing daffodils for nearly two thousand years. No one has inspired me more about leveraging failure for success than Sara Blakely. I saw her on the television show Billions once, but our paths have never crossed.
All I had to do to learn from these incredible people, and many others like them, was to study their lives. Take, for example, Stephen King. I treat his fiction like a textbook. I highlight, underline, circle, and review. I’ve learned more from studying his writing than I ever could from a formal “mentoring” session where I would ask him if he has any advice on writing (to which he would probably respond, “Go read my books.”).
You can channel the power of these teachers without holding a seance. Pick your favorite source of inspiration and ask yourself this question: What would they do if they were in my shoes? What would Elon Musk do when faced with this challenge? How would Elizabeth Gilbert tackle this creativity problem? How would Jane Austen develop the character in my novel? If you’ve done your homework, and studied their works, you’ll know what the answer is.
So, to those of you looking for real-life mentors, I say, stop looking.
Your mentors are already all around you.
You just have to open your eyes to see them.
Ozan Varol is a rocket scientist turned law professor and bestselling author. Click here to download a free copy of his e-book, The Contrarian Handbook: 8 Principles for Innovating Your Thinking. Along with your free e-book, you’ll get the Weekly Contrarian — a newsletter that challenges conventional wisdom and changes the way we look at the world (plus access to exclusive content for subscribers only).
Short story that inspired me to write a Quick Poem below
Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls — family, health, friends, integrity — are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life.
The Sharp And Grand Rock
A Poem by Jay Parkhe
Whose rock is that? I think I know.
Its owner is quite angry though.
He was cross like a dark potato.
I watch him pace. I cry A’llo.
He gives his rock a shake,
And screams you’ve made a bad mistake.
The only other sound’s the break,
Of distant glasses and bars awake.
The Rock is sharp, Grand and deep,
But he has promises to keep,
Tormented with nightbirds he never sleeps.
Revenge is a promise a man must keep.
He rises from his flat bed,
With thoughts of violence in his head,
A flash of rage and he sees red.
Without a men-O-pause you turned and fled.
With thanks to the poet, Robert Frost, for the underlying structure
Playing For Keeps Meaning: Said when things are about to get serious. They indeed did. On mails first. In two meetings later and with Lunch at 5 PM when my Sugar levels went down and I was dizzy!
Jack of All Trades Master of None Meaning: Having suitable skill in multiple things, but not being an expert in any of them. That is Soooo … applicable to me! Never could master one thing… But kept learning and gaining different skills upto Advanced levels. Some I could even impart, teach while learning.
Cry Over Spilt Milk Meaning: It’s useless to worry about things that already happened and cannot be changed. Yes. Indeed. There are things in the past, no one has a time machine to go back and correct. We either live with them or Let Go of the Past. Later is the most difficult and hence they live with us. Wish I was a sweetmeat maker = a Halwai who could transform the split milk into Paneer = cottage cheese or Rosogullas ! 🙂
A Fool and His Money are Soon Parted Meaning: It’s easy for a fool to lose his/her money. Have been there, seen it all happen to me and many I have come across. It is indeed a true saying. But it did not happen today – but waiting to happen to someone/ some people I know.
You Can’t Teach an Old Dog New Tricks Meaning: It can be challenging to teach a person something new. I am an Old Dog in that sense, but I do not stop learning, either I enroll to and get some or the other certification or life teaches me and it becomes my EXPERIENCE 🙂
High And Dry Meaning: To be left behind; abandoned. Being in a helpless situation without a way to recover. No. Not happening.
Don’t Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch Meaning: Do not rely on something you are not sure of. I agree with this phrase wholeheartedly.
Roll With the Punches Meaning: To tolerate or endure through the unexpected mishappenings you may encounter from time to time. Yes. My Risk Mitigation mindset.
Read ‘Em and Weep Meaning: Often said by the winner in poker, as the others ‘weep’ over the loss. Hmmmm….. Who’s the winner?
Cry Over Spilt Milk Meaning: It’s useless to worry about things that already happened and cannot be changed. No needle can sew the split milk. Best to bury the past and move on. Let Go is the best policy.
Keep Your Shirt On Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset. Yes. This is coming true.
Wouldn’t Harm a Fly Meaning: Nonviolent; someone who is mild or gentle. I started with a Narcissist’s shameless self promo WhatsApp messages bombarded every day. I know the guy is desperate to make money but this has to stop.
Don’t Look a Gift Horse In The Mouth Meaning: When you receive a gift from someone, do not be ungrateful. I experience the converse all the time by giving gifts. I made a rule, never to expect even a thank you, leave along a word of gratitude in any other phrase.
Tug of War Meaning: It can refer to the popular rope pulling game or it can mean a struggle for authority. This is one constant struggle, like everyone I go thru.
Break The Ice Meaning: Breaking down a social stiffness. Social stiffness can go away but how do deal with the inner =Gut stiffness – IDK know. Not -yet atleast.
Who agrees, commits but rarely fulfills?
1. Has No integrity
2. Wanted to say NO BUT said yes!
3. Cheats him/herself
4. Is unable to prioritise and funnel/ filter doables and undoables?
5. Wants to fool others by agreements which are rarely fulfilled
6. Is a chest with self and will cheat others
7. Is exploitative of others
8. Has no sense of right or wrong
Perceptions are right or wrong, assumptions are partial judgements again right or wrong.
But if a person is wrong person?
Meaning: Coming close to a successful outcome only to fall short at the end. Will make sure, this does not happen today.
No Ifs, Ands, or Buts
Meaning: Finishing a task without making any excuses. Yess. FINISHIATIVE.
Burst Your Bubble
Meaning: To ruin someone’s happy moment. NO. Don’t want to do that.
Don’t Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch
Meaning: Do not rely on something you are not sure of. Sane advice. So many plans put in motion, so many processes and work in progress that my elder cousin warned me not to take too much on my plate. Sane advice. I am still far away from my 9 kilo weight reduction goal for this month.
Meaning: Someone that calls for help when it is not needed. Someone who is lying. Yes. It happens again and again and again with me and I always fall prey. God give me a Midas touch – Nay! Give a truly healing touch I PRAY to you.
Meaning: Getting sincere about something; applying oneself seriously to a job. All the time. Never changed on this. Keep at it. That’s my philosophy and that’s what I preach and practice.
I like to generate these random phrases and compare their attributions at the End of the day and usually they come correct.
Let’s see what’s in store for me today.
Go For Broke
Meaning: To risk it all, even if it means losing everything. To go all out. If the message is about achieving 10000 likes in 58 days and thanking the BFFFs with deep sense of gratitude. I am all for it.
In a Pickle
Meaning: Being in a difficult predicament; a mess; an undesirable situation. Yes. it is true and getting out is messy. Staying in is messier. Feels like a Camel whose owner wants to make him piss inside the tent but keep his Head out so that owner’s privacy is protected 🙂
Up In Arms
Meaning: Angry; being roused to the point that you are ready to fight. Hmmm.. there is no fight left in me any more. I would rather honorably and peacefully walk aaway from UNCERTAINTY and SITUATIONS that bother me.
Put a Sock In It
Meaning: Asking someone to be quiet or to shut up. No. That’s not Me. I would rather talk it over to a conclusion.
Give a Man a Fish
Meaning: It’s better to teach a person how to do something than to do that something for them. Yes. fully agree. Handholding by the mentor can not become Mentor’s tasks – A mentor needs to find a way to Wean to Win so the Mentees WTW Win The World.
I use this small hack I call as Tantra whenever I have a Bad BAd or Sad SAD day.
Someone once gifted me a Bible, and I have a childhood ShrimadbhagwatGita.
I open a page to read a Verse or a Shloka.
Yesterday, was one such day. I went to my daily morning walks and stopped for taking some change at the Tea Shop. The devout guy was lighting Agarbatti/ Incense to Lord Ganpati, Goddess Saraswati and Goddess Lakshmi. I said, Good Omen ( Yes, even a Skeptic on a bad bad sad sad day can become believer ! ).
I read the following
2 Kings 2:18Passage: When they returned to Elisha, who was staying in Jericho, he said to them, “Didn’t I tell you not to go?”
I like these randomly generated sentences. See what I fond today. They are great creativity exercise. Words in Bold are my thoughts. 🙂
The shooter says goodbye to his love.
Well, Almost. The key word missing was trigger and I found the right trigger to do the Right things and took back my Good bye:)
She works two jobs to make ends meet; at least, that was her reason for not having time to join us.
The between the lines word reader, Mean Meaning Making mind of mine found something. Guess what? Ignore, Neglect to Kill ! 🙂 Happened to you any time? Well, it does happen to me all the time . 🙂
What was the person thinking when they discovered cow’s milk was fine for human consumption… and why did they do it in the first place!?
I found this sentence very interesting. Did you? Provokes thoughts, No? I am called a Provocative Coach, who challenges coachees, mentees all the time with such and other questions 🙂 🙂
To end, I know many in India consider it a Bad Omen if a Cat – especially a black cat crosses the road. This morning coming back from my walk, I noticed a Golden yellow colored cute cat, waiting to cross the road, I stopped in my tracks, the Skeptic in me said, “Move on, you are a skeptic, don’t have these thoughts, there is no such thing as BAD OMEN! ”
AND,…. What happened was hilarious…..
…………………… The Cute Golden Yellow color Cat
Simply nodded at me – as if saying – you cross first – I don’t believe in Bad Omens either 🙂
I crossed the road and saw the cat also coolly crossing the road. 🙂
The three sentences I found at randome are: Will be interesting how they apply by the end of the day as possible solutions to the problems at hand.
I use Dr. Edward De Bono’s Random object attribution listing method of creative problem solving and the variant I use is Random sentences and Random phrases. Both are path breakers in most instances that I have tried personally, for others or for businesses. Try it out.
Lets all be unique together until we realise we are all the same.
Mary plays the piano.
My Mum tries to be cool by saying that she likes all the same things that I do.
Meaning: Don’t judge someone or something only by the outward appearance. They can be fooling. How long we allow ourselves to be fooled is up to us REALLY
A Fool and His Money are Soon Parted
It’s easy for a fool to lose his/her money. Hmmm…
Mountain Out of a Molehill
Meaning: One who escalates small things and turns them into big problems. Quite true. We meet complaining, whining people who avoid ownership, responsibility taking and attribute failures others rather than owning up mistakes.
Not the Sharpest Tool in the Shed
Meaning: Someone who isn’t witty or sharp, but rather, they are ignorant, unintelligent, or senseless. Some people are so phony intellectuals who parrotise, write dictated mails by others, and when confronted just run away.
Teelo Teelo was thinking about Heart Break again. Heart was a cold-blooded juggler with pursed lips and Teelo Teelo had self cause hurt to his fingers.
Teelo walked over to the window and reflected on his Odorless surroundings. He had always loved The Dark Skies with its filthy, fried Universe, Full of Stars, Self Illuminated and those shining with reflected Glory. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel concerned.
Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the a cold-blooded figure of Heart Break.
Teelo gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. She was a snotty, scheming, beer drinker with skinny body and slimy, sweaty palms. His friends saw her as a testy, tough teacher. Once, she had even rescued an ashamed old man from a road accident.
But not even a snotty person who had once rescued an ashamed old man from a road adccident, was prepared for what Heart had in store today.
The clouds danced like gyrating pigeons, making Teelo sparkly. Teelo grabbed a crumpled guillotine that had been strewn nearby; he massaged it with his fingers.
As Teelo stepped outside and Heart came closer, he could see the vague glint in her eye.
Heart glared with all the wrath of 4432 clumsy squidgy snakes. She said, in hushed tones, “I hate you but I want xoxo.”
Teelo looked back, even more sparkly and still fingering the crumpled guillotine. “Heart, I bid you adiós, adieu, addio, adeus. … aloha. … arrivederci. … ciao. … auf Wiedersehen. … au revoir. … bon voyage. … sayonara,” he replied.
They looked at each other with calm feelings, like two flabby, flipping frogs thinking at a very arrogant disco, which had trance music playing in the background and two spiteful uncles chatting to the beat.
Teelo studied Heart’s sticky lips and hurt fingers. Eventually, he took a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” began Teelo in apologetic tones, “but I don’t feel the same way, and I never will. I just don’t hate you Heart.”
Heart looked lonely, her emotions raw like a kooky, kaleidoscopic knife.
Teelo could actually hear Heart’s emotions shatter into 4863 pieces. Then the cold-blooded juggler hurried away into the distance.
Not even a drink of beer would calm Teelo’s nerves tonight.
Meaning: Someone or something that looks to be defeated, or nearly so. Does it mean Me?
A Fool and His Money are Soon Parted
Meaning: It’s easy for a fool to lose his/her money. Quite true. I fall prey all the time to neuromarketing gimmicks.
Keep Your Shirt On
Meaning: Keeping calm. Usually said by someone who is trying to avoid making others upset. LOL ! how true!
Back To the Drawing Board
Meaning: Starting over again on a new design from a previously failed attempt. Yes. I am. Trying Hard. Redesigning blog. Planning whether to restart painting. Have to prepare two teaching courses. Dependency is BAD.
A Dime a Dozen
Meaning: Something that is extremely common. Hmmm. I am so mundane ! 🙂
Quick and Dirty Meaning: Things that are fixed with great speed, but as a result, it’s probably not going to work very well. No, it wasn’t dirty but it was a bad prank I played for a couple of days having failed last time, I think it has gone awry again and I may be on the brink of losing a good friend. That will be very sad.
No-Brainer Meaning: Anything that requires minimal brain activity to accomplish. I thought it displays my state of mind today with No brains 🙂 but fortunately it means something else.
Know the Ropes Meaning: Having a familiarity or understanding of how something works. Yes. I have said sorry profusely. I am hoping it will work.
What Goes Up Must Come Down Meaning: Things that go up must eventually return to the earth due to gravity. I am positive.
Don’t Look a Gift Horse In The Mouth Meaning: When you receive a gift from someone, do not be ungrateful. Will have to wait and see how the day unfolds hereafter.
13th May to 27th June – 6 weeks, 45 days of regular posting on WordPress gave me GFFs:) Great friends and followers who have delighted me with 16000+ views 8000+ likes 6000 Visitors and 300+ comments. What can I say – I can only express my humble GRATITUDE to you all for this.
30 John Lennon Quotes About Life And Lessons To Inspire You
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John Lennon was a member of The Beatles band, singer, writer, and peace activist. Born in Liverpool, England in 1940, he created great music, that has become famous over the years.
Together with his friend Paul McCartney, Lennon founded The Beatles, which is one of the most famous and successful pop bands in the history of music.
Lennon left the band in 1969, and later, he released Double Fantasy, along with his wife, Yoko Ono. In 1980, he was shot dead by Mark David Chapman, one of his crazy fans.
John Lennon’s lyrics and quotes had a tremendous impact worldwide.
Even though “you may say he’s a dreamer,” he promoted love, peace, and equality his entire life. Here’s our selection of Lennon’s amazing quotes, life lessons and lyrics, that still inspire people all around the world today:
30 John Lennon Quotes About Life And Lessons To Inspire You
Life Lesson #1: Be Yourself
1. “I’m not going to change the way I look or the way I feel to conform to anything. I’ve always been a freak. So I’ve been a freak all my life and I have to live with that, you know. I’m one of those people.” – John Lennon
2. “You don’t need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are. You are what you are!” – John Lennon
3. “We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.” – John Lennon
4. “Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.” – John Lennon
5. “It matters not who you love, where you love, why you love, when you love or how you love, it matters only that you love.” – John Lennon
6. “It doesn’t matter how long my hair is or what colour my skin is or whether I’m a woman or a man.” – John Lennon
7. “There’s nowhere you can be that isn’t where you’re meant to be…” – John Lennon
8. “If there’s such a thing as genius — I am one. And if there isn’t, I don’t care.” – John Lennon
Life Lesson #2: Love, Forgive, Enjoy and IMAGINE.
9. “I believe in everything until it’s disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it’s in your mind. Who’s to say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now? ” – John Lennon
10. “A mistake is only an error, it becomes a mistake when you fail to correct it.” – John Lennon
11. “If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there’d be peace.” – John Lennon
12. “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon
13. “When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.” – John Lennon
14. “We live in a world where we have to hide to make love, while violence is practised in broad daylight.” – John Lennon
15. “Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.” – John Lennon
16. “Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us, and the world will be as one.” – John Lennon
17. “I don’t believe in killing whatever the reason!” – John Lennon
18. “Love is the greatest refreshment in life.” – John Lennon
Life Lesson #3: Accept that You Still Have a Lot to Learn
19. “The more I see the less I know for sure.” – John Lennon
20. “I don’t believe in yesterday, by the way.” – John Lennon
21. “If someone thinks that love and peace is a cliché that must have been left behind in the Sixties, that’s his problem. Love and peace are eternal.” – John Lennon
22. “I can’t wake you up. You can wake you up. I can’t cure you. You can cure you.” – John Lennon
23. “A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” – John Lennon
24. “You either get tired fighting for peace, or you die. Declare it. Just the same way we declare war. That is how we will have peace… we just need to declare it.” – John Lennon
25. “Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives. I think we’re being run by maniacs for maniacal ends and I think I’m liable to be put away as insane for expressing that. That’s what’s insane about it.” – John Lennon
26. “There is an alternative to war. It’s staying in bed and growing your hair.” – John Lennon
27. “Only by trying on other people’s clothes do we find what size we are.” – John Lennon
Life Lesson #4: Always Remember
28. “Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.” – John Lennon
29. “Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.” – John Lennon
John Lennon’s beautiful sayings will remain in our hearts forever. Even though he is gone, his memory and name will never be forgotten. To conclude, let me remind you one of my favourite quotes:
30. “A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” – John Lennon
On 13th May I began writing this blog again – regularly.
This month I resolved to learn again and I enrolled for 10 UDEMY online courses. It is a wonderful feeling of FINISHIATIVE when I completed the new learning, new knowledge I gained. I know at 65 years of age, it does not qualify me for another job role in any corporate but the feeling of Self Fulfillment स्वान्तः सुखाय (the way Goswami Tulsidas wrote Ramayana – For स्वान्तः सुखाय not for others but it became the Holy book for Hindus), it is that feeling.
The only Real Knowledge is the Knowledge that God is the inner dweller in good people and in so-called bad, in saint and in so-called sinner.
This Knowledge requires you to help all equally as circumstances demand without expectation of reward, and when compelled to take part in a dispute, to act without the slightest trace of enmity or hatred; to try to make others happy with brotherly or sisterly feeling for each one; and to harm no one in thought, word or deed, not even those who harm you.
This certificate above verifies that Dhananjay Parkhe successfully completed the course Brand storytelling (Neuromarketing approach) on 06/20/2018 as taught by Heba Mahdy on Udemy. The certificate indicates the entire course was completed as validated by the student.
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From commanding troops in the army to leading budding entrepreneurs across the country
SME INSPIRATIONS3 Comments
7 days ago — 7 min read
Founder: Vandana Sharma
Year it was founded: 2017
Sector: Business Services
Based out of: Bengaluru
Major Vandana Sharma has been a pathbreaker all her life. Her sense of adventure and tenacity led to her reaching the position of Major in the Indian Army. As a woman and a successful officer, she broke many stereotypes about women in uniform while in service. Her career in the armed forces is distinguished with her contribution to the Kargil War of 1999 being recorded and commended in the Military History of Army Ordnance Corps. From then to today, her entrepreneurial spirit, as she puts it, has attracted her to situations that required her innovative spirit and problem solving skills to resolve. Post her military career, Vandana forayed into the corporate world and has 21 years of diverse experience across multiple sectors. Working in leadership positions, she has added value to hiring practices and organisational transformation at companies like Wipro, Myntra and GMR. She established StartupPeopleConsulting in 2017 in Bengaluru. StartupPeopleConsulting is an organisation geared towards guiding entrepreneurs as they move towards their goals. Vandana is a TEDx speaker and she also speaks at various women’s forums to inspire and motivate more women to live independent and empowered lives.
Time in the army
Vandana was raised as a ‘fauji’ kid. Her father, and many other members of her family, were part of the armed forces. She found herself dreaming of being in the armed forces from a very young age and successfully took forward the family tradition of serving the country. Looking back, she narrates an experience that shaped her conviction. “My father was in the Air Force and my brother who is eight-years-older than me also joined the army. I would wear my father’s cap when he would return home and look myself in the mirror wondering if I could ever wear the uniform. I was in grade two or three then.”
Women were not allowed in the armed forces at the time, but change was in the offing. Women were included for the first time on the rolls in 1992 and Vandana knew she wanted to be part of this landmark change. In a batch of 33, she became one of the first few women to don the army greens. Her leaderships skills shone through, and over the course of the next 10 years, she attained the rank of Major and served with distinction in the Kargil War. Speaking about her time at the Army, she shares, “If you can run as fast, shoot as well, and do what you are signed up for – in my case, it was being able to supply stores effortlessly – as well as other male counterparts, nobody looks down upon you or considers you less.”
Following her successful stint in the army, she forayed into the corporate world. Her unique brand of leadership and experience helped her make significant contributions as an organisation transformer at Myntra, GMR, and Wipro – all large companies with commensurately large challenges.
While working with these companies, she realised that she had an entrepreneurial streak in her, being drawn to situations where things were “being done for the first time in an organisation or amid chaos and needed a fix.” Importantly, she realised, as she says, “It gave me a lot of joy to share my experience and help guide budding entrepreneurs on setting up startups and working with limited resources, financial constraints and acute deadlines.”
Her passion for supporting budding entrepreneurs took root and she founded StartUpPeopleConsulting in August 2017. Vandana shares, “A lot of entrepreneurs learn the hard way after making mistakes right from the start — from the time of searching for co-founders and early employees to find the right talent as per not just the skill or sector but also the values and vision of the organisations. My project helps early entrepreneurs with all people-related matters and also helps build their networks and teams across locations with minimum effort and speedy timelines.”
Challenges of starting up
Vandana finds, that like most entrepreneurs, her main issues are resource allocation, prioritisation, and selecting the right projects to address the right issues in challenging areas. Of course, scaling up and monetisation are areas of focus as she builds her business.
Vandana finds GlobalLinker very helpful as a networking tool. She says,“GlobalLinker is a great platform for digital meetings for small businesses. I am exploring business opportunities to expand my business network. This platform should be able to bring like-minded folks together who can leverage on each other and grow from strength to strength. The productivity tools and offers are very useful.”
Big business dream
Vandana’s dreams reveal a lot about her determined and visionary nature. When asked about her big business dream, she says, “I want to contribute towards building and nurturing an ecosystem for startups in India. I want to ensure that new-age organisations are agile and swift-footed to enable meeting market dynamics globally, have consistent performances like any other economic power, and build a great work ethic and culture in Indian startups. The right foundation and talent could help them grow into multi-billion organisations. Besides this, I am passionate about making a difference to this world. The causes which are close to my heart are women’s empowerment and doing something meaningful for armed forces veterans.”
Advice to aspiring entrepreneurs
“It’s a marathon so stay the course and don’t sprint. My motto in life has been: The universe falls in love with a stubborn heart! What you wish for always comes true if you work hard for it, so if you believe in your journey and purpose, it will come true one day,” shares Vandana.
Network with Vandana Sharma by clicking on the ‘Invite’ button on her profile.
Disclaimer: This article is based solely on the inputs shared by the featured member. GlobalLinker does not necessarily endorse the views, opinions & facts stated by the member.
All life is an effort to attain freedom from self-created entanglement.
It is a desperate struggle to undo what has been done under ignorance, to throw away the accumulated burden of the past, to find rescue from the debris left by a series of temporary achievements and failures.
Life seeks to unwind the limiting sanskaras of the past and to obtain release from the mazes of its own making, so that its further creations may spring directly from the heart of eternity and bear the stamp of unhampered freedom and intrinsic richness of being which knows no limitation.
Pt. Deen Dayal Upadhyay gave a Mantra – Charaiveti, CharaiVeti. Keep Walking .. And Trust me Chalte Chalte – Just morning Walking I am doing these certifications and it feels so good. Learning new things, new skills is my passion and now I have all the time available to pursue thing I always wanted to do. 🙂
Someone commented on my old tie –all it needs is a stitch.
I was humbled.”
Those were good old Corporate days. Sometimes due to the Global Time Differences, it would become difficult to get people on Conference Calls/ Video Calls/ Audio Chats.
I remember vividly, one of the colleagues took a dig at my tie whose label had come out from one side and was visible to the powerful camera and hence to all participants.
My colleague said “All your Old Tie needs is a Stitch”. It humbled me.
Today, I do not remember the name of the colleague and my bad, I did not note it down in the Evernote.
Thinking – how to mend some of the Old ties? The Old friendships. The Oldest ones for example. A friend sent me a WhatsApp last afternoon “All well? No news from you for long?”
I thought, this friend was visiting USA to his two sons and may not have access to his Indian phone number/ whatsapp as it is a long stay – he had planned to stay for 6 months.
Then after a while, I found two missed calls and one which stopped before 3 rings ( Damn Redmi Y1 and Damn my One Plus 5 T). I called him. He was back 15 days ago and was shifting home after 34 years. We became colleagues and later thick friends since 1985. His old flat / building was going under renovation and the neighbors were concerned that he had not yet vacated the flat so that the builder can start work. He shifted to a small one bedroom flat. Sitting among boxes, he thought of me and called. He was worried as most babyboomers do when they do not get RESPONSE.
We had a catch up chat, I said I may visit your town soon for a morning/ evening trip and will try and atleast speak from airport. He said stay back, be my guest. Let’s catch up. We may be gone again for a long long time to USA and who knows….
I knew I was humbled again – All the Old Tie needed what just a proverbial STITCH.
A retired old couple returned to a Mercedes dealership where the salesman promised to hold a car for them.
But they found the car was just sold to a beautiful, leggy, busty blonde in a mini skirt and a halter top.
The old man was visibly upset. He spoke to the salesman sharply, “Young man, you said you hold that car till we raised the $95,000 asking price, yet you closed the deal for $75,000 to the young lady there. And if I remember right, you had insisted there was no discount for this model !
“The salesman took a deep breath, cleared his throat and reached for a large glass of water.
“Well, what can I tell you? She had the cash ready, didn’t need any financing help, and, Sir, just look at her, how could I resist?”, replied the grinning salesman sheepishly.
Just then the young woman walked over to the senior couple and gave the car keys to the old man.
“There you go,” she said. “I told you I could get him to lower the price. See you later Dad, Happy Father’s day.”
Once again….. don’t mess with seniors. I love this one.
A great laugh. 😛😛😛😛😛
Selfishness and selflessness are two phases of the life of the personal ego, and these two phases are continuous with each other.
Selfishness arises when all the desires are centred around the narrow individuality. Selflessness arises when this crude organisation of desires suffers disintegration and there is a general dispersing of desires with the result that they cover a much wider sphere.
Selfishness is the narrowing down of interests to a limited field; selflessness is the extension of interests over a wide field.
To put it paradoxically, selfishness is a restricted form of selflessness, and selflessness is the drawing out of selfishness into a wide sphere of activity.
A chance encounter in a fertilizer dealer shop reminds me of this caption always. I met a group of Guntotting Ex Dacoits who had spent 7 years in Open Jail as punishment and surrendered in front of Late Shri JayPrakash Narayan.
This Ex Dacoit was a Farmer and political leader now. When introduced as the sales person who was selling his favorite brand of fertilizer – He had asked in HINDI whther “Ye Saheb swarthee hain ya parmarthee”. A Deep question about whether this person I am being introduced is Selfish or Selfless? Even an Ex Convict chooses to know this beforehand. Why I wondered?
I had a mental turmoil. At such moments, I turn to Gita, Ramayan, Bible and turn a page and pick one verse or quote. Try and mull and understand the meaning to find inner peace and God’s message to me to listen to my inner voice with HIS Voice reverberating in my mind together.
This is a personal technique – I call it Jay’s Tantra and it helps me at times to go find the meaning beyond the words, deeply thinking, introspecting, reminiscences of the past and slowly it brings me to the present – my STATE and shows me a path to overcome the mental turmoil, dilemmas, indecisive phase, awkwardness of the decisions I thought or took and their impact.
I need to hear a preacher understand the quote from the bible but the belief that it is a God’s word – leads me to what I began searching and it has helped in terrible moments in my life. They have always helped me to bounce back with vigor, rigor, self-confidence.
Reconnect with your grandparents or an elderly person you know – give them a call! ( I reconnected with my granddaughter after a long while – she’s fluent in English, Hindi, Marathi and taught me a few Telugu words too 🙂 . WOW !
Lend a friend a book you think they’d like (Gave away a whole library)
Leave a kind message anywhere (in a library book, on a computer etc.)
Wardrobe overflowing? Donate clothes to a charity ( I give it to a Blind school)
Make amends with someone you may have wronged (Hmmm….. May be, I will)
Know someone going through something you’ve been through? Give them advice
Volunteer your time for a good cause (PLANNING to create a video channel for the charities I support with help of a startup Video/ Filmmaker).
Help someone improve, give them constructive feedback (Neyt! I’d rather feedforward as we can’t go back and correct it – but we can shape up in future.)
We all love surprises! Buy someone an unexpected gift – Yes. worth a thought (Wife and daughter both gifted ME a USPA T-shirt each ! )
Plant a seed – yes overdue. Note to self. Must do.
Why Breakups Hurt Like Hell
How to manage the pain and move on
Lesley Alderman, LMSW
Photo: Portland Press Herald/Getty
This is what I remember from my last major breakup: the cracks in the ceiling. I spent a good 10 hours lying on the couch in my East Village apartment staring at the ceiling, following the lines etched in the fading paint, as if they would lead to more answers. I was stunned that I could feel so drained and defeated even though I had initiated the end.
Breakups can be devastating. You can feel like a desperate 3-year-old lost in a grocery store or a hollowed-out wreck. Why? Because we’re human, and humans are designed to pair with other humans. Uncoupling and rejection feel like threats to our existence. We tend to respond with some variation on the themes of despair, confusion, and rage.
“Separation distress elicits panic,” explains Sue Johnson, PhD, an internationally recognized couples therapist and author. “And people don’t know how to make sense of it.”
Making sense of a breakup, though, is vital: it helps you recover. Looking at what happened and why will reduce the sting and help you make a better choice next time.
The pain you are experiencing is understandable, when you recognize that humans are bonding creatures hardwired for relationships. We are designed to grow and learn in the presence of others. Our connections to lovers, friends, and family define us and help us survive. Healthy intimate relationships provide us with a sense of safety and serve as a buffer against the slings and arrows the world hurls our way.
One study, which looked at the power of hand-holding, showed how robust the buffering effect of a partner can be. Researchers at the University of Wisconsin, Madison observed how 16 happily married heterosexual women reacted when they were threatened with an electric shock. The women were hooked up to a brain scanner, which measured their responses to the shock threat. In one scenario, the women held their husband’s hand, in another they held the hand of an anonymous male experimenter, and in the final scenario, they held no hand at all.
When the women held their husband’s hand, the area of the brain that processes emotional and behavioral threats was less activated than when the women held the hand of the stranger or held no hand. The more favorably the women had rated the quality of their marriage, the more powerful the buffering effect of their husband’s hand. It’s no wonder, then, that losing that safeguard can elicit despair.
Being part of a couple can also change your identity. Researchers at Northwestern University examined the effect that breakups have on self-concept. The 2010 study found that becoming single makes you feel less significant. “When the relationship ends, individuals experience not only pain over the loss of the partner, but also changes in their selves,” the study’s authors wrote.
Breakups can also trigger feelings of shame. “We consider any relationship that ends a failure,” explains Katherine Woodward Thomas, a licensed marriage and family therapist and author of Conscious Uncoupling (yes, the book that Gwyneth made famous). “We have this belief that love should last forever.” But in reality, most of us will have two to three relationships in our lifetimes and two to three major breakups.
When you’re the one being left, the sting is particularly sharp. Rejection triggers feelings of humiliation, isolation, and pain. Research by Naomi Eisenberger at UCLA has found that the emotional pain of rejection is coded in the same part of the brain as physical pain. Your rational mind may try to downplay the rejection — “Eh, he wasn’t worth it,” — but it registers in your brain as if you’d been punched in the gut.
The best remedy for the pain that follows a breakup is self-care and self-examination. Before you can recover and make rational sense of the breakup, you first need to attend to your shaken sense of self. Talk about the demise of the relationship with your friends, spend time with people who treat you well, write about your worries. Remind yourself that breakups can be traumatic; you need time to adjust and recover.
At the same time, resist self-destructive urges. Don’t stalk your ex online (this will increase your level of distress), pretend you’re fine (suppressing feelings leads, over the longer term, to greater emotional drama), or try to numb your pain with excessive amounts of alcohol, substances, or sex (never a good plan).
When you’re ready, ask yourself, ‘What can I learn from this relationship?’ A 2017 study looked at the romantic relationships and breakups of 160 young adults. The researchers found that when individuals understood the reasons for their breakup, they suffered less stress and reported more satisfaction in their next relationship than their less clued-in peers.
Resist the all-too-satisfying desire to totally demonize your ex as a whacked out psychopathic narcissistic wreck of a person. “Okay, maybe your ex was 97 percent of the problem,” says Woodward Thomas. “But let’s look at your three percent. That’s where the gold is.” What did you not say or do — or fail to say or do? What warning signs did you ignore? What old pattern were you replaying? Did you give your power away? Women, for instance, have a tendency to bond more quickly. Men, of course, tend to hang back, wary of committing too much, too fast. Even though those tendencies are well known, we may not see ourselves living out such patterns as they’re happening. “Until you see what you are doing, you are bound to do it again,” says Woodward Thomas.
You will start to figure out who might be a better match for you. Bear in mind, people who are emotionally responsive tend to make the best partners. If you’ve never had the pleasure of dating an emotionally responsive human, here’s what they look like: they listen; they can tolerate your emotions, even when they’re negative; they are moved by your feelings; they are not terrified of vulnerability (they may not love it, but at least they don’t belittle it).
In general, people who are available, reliable, and trustworthy also make good partners in romance and life. Research consistently shows that people who have mates with these characteristics feel secure, nurtured, and supported in their relationships.
“Breakups hurt so much because relationships are so important to us,” says Dr. Johnson. But, with some effort, it’s possible to turn the pain into self-gain. Before you get involved in your next relationship, take some time to picture what a good, enduring one looks like to you.
Lesley Alderman, LMSW
Writer. Psychotherapist. Yoga enthusiast. Interested in mental health and helping people feel psychologically sound. Brooklyn based. www.lesleyalderman.com
I have blogged for 15 years. My other blog on blogger.com has 2,57,000 views todate.
This is my second year of blogging here and from 13th May, my new friends have encouraged me with their comments, likes, views which is astonishing, pleasing and a gratifying experience. Thank you all.
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Death will be ‘optional’ and ageing ‘curable’ by 2045, say genetic engineers
Sat, Apr 21, 2018
DYING will be ‘optional’ within just 27 years and the ageing process will be ‘reversible’, according to two genetic engineers during the presentation of their new book in Barcelona.
José Luis Cordeiro, born in Venezuela to Spanish parents, and Cambridge (UK) mathematician David Wood, founders of the operating system ‘Symbian’, have just published The Death of Death and say immortality is a real and scientific possibility that could come much earlier than originally thought.
Humans will only die in accidents, never of natural causes or illness, by around the year 2045, say Cordeiro and Wood, who say it is ‘crucial’ that old age starts to be classified as an ‘illness’ so that publicly-funded research into its ‘cure’ can extend.
Nanotechnology is key, among other new genetic manipulation techniques, the engineers said during the presentation at Barcelona’s Equestrian Circle.
The process will involve turning ‘bad’ genes into healthy ones, eliminating dead cells from the body, repairing damaged cells, treatments with stem cells and ‘printing’ vital organs in 3D.
Cordeiro, who is based at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) in the USA, says he has ‘chosen not to die’ and that in 30 years’ time, he will be ‘younger than he is today’.
Ageing is the result of DNA ‘tails’, known as ‘telomeres’, in chromosomes – of which every cell except red blood and sex cells has 23 pairs – becoming shorter, and reversing ageing involves lengthening the telomeres.
Telomeres become damaged and shortened with the passage of time, a process that speeds up in the event of toxins entering the body – smoking, alcohol and air pollution are among elements that reduce the length of telomeres, thus accelerating ageing.
Cordeiro and Wood believe that within 10 years, illnesses such as cancer will be curable, and that major international corporations such as Google will be ‘entering the field of medicine’ because they are ‘beginning to realise that curing ageing is possible’.
Microsoft has reportedly already announced the setting up of a cryopreservation centre in which a scientist is researching the possibility of cancer being completely curable within a decade.
The engineers explain that, although ‘people generally do not know about it’, it was discovered in 1951 how cancer cells are immortal: when Henrietta Lacks died from cervical cancer, surgeons removed the tumour and kept it – and it is still ‘alive’ today.
Immortality will not necessarily mean the planet becomes overcrowded, the scientists say: there is still plenty of room for more people on Earth, and these days, people do not have anywhere near as many children as they did in past decades and centuries; plus, ‘it will be possible to live in space by then’.
“Japan and the Koreas, if they continue with their current trend of hardly having any children, will become extinct – within two centuries, there’ll be no Japanese or Korean people on the planet,” Cordeiro says.
“But thanks to these new techniques, there will indeed be Japanese and Korean people, because they’ll live forever and remain young.”
The cost of anti-ageing treatment was compared to that of the latest SmartPhones.
“At first, it’ll be expensive, but with a competitive market the price will gradually fall because it’ll be something that benefits everyone,” Cordeiro says.
“Technology, when it’s new, is poor and extremely expensive, but it eventually becomes democratic and mainstream and becomes cheaper.”
The engineers say they have already been employing their techniques for two years – illegally, but in Colombia where there are fewer regulations covering genetic manipulation.
Elisabeth Parrish, their first human patient, ‘started to see symptoms of ageing and asked what could be done to prevent it’.
Her treatment is ‘very risky and even illegal’, Wood explains, but at the moment is going well, has not had any adverse side-effects, and the level of telomeres in her blood is ’20 years younger than before’.
“I want Spain to have a place in the world of these technologies and show that we’re not mad, it’s just that people still don’t know about them,” Wood concluded.
The Death of Death will eventually be published in four languages at first – Spanish, English, Portuguese and Korean – and all proceeds from its sales will be ploughed back into the authors’ research.
Everyone makes mistakes. Maybe you forgot to buy milk at the grocery store, or perhaps an important e-mail to your boss went off with a glaring typo in the subject line. At least you can rest assured that life’s little mishaps rarely lead to much greater calamities.
Some mistakes, however, are so colossal that they can change the world as we know it forever. The fates of nations and millions of people have sometimes hinged on a single bad decision. From the sinking of RMS Titanicto the selling of Alaska to the United States, here are ten big screwups that changed the course of history.
Before Captain James Cook, a British explorer, landed on the eastern coast of Australia, the Dutch had sailed to it over 100 years earlier in 1606. It is believed Captain Willem Janszoon of the Dutch ship Duyfken explored approximately 320 kilometers (200 mi) of the Cape York Peninsula’s western side.
More Dutchmen also explored both the western and southern coasts for many decades and called the land New Holland. However, the Dutch made zero attempts to claim the land or establish settlements, and so it was left to Captain Cook to plant the flag in 1770.
9The Habsburg Farcical Friendly Fire
The Austro-Turkish War was fought between the Habsburg and Ottoman Empires between 1788 and 1791. In 1788, one of the most farcical friendly fire incidents ever occurred, which allowed the Ottomans to gain an advantage in the war. It all started on the night of September 21–22, when the Austrian hussars crossed a river to scout for Turks. While they did not find the enemy, they did come across locals, who sold the weary troops wine. The Austrian commander, however, was waiting at the camp, concerned whether their troops would make it back, so sent infantry across the river to find them.
Once the infantry found the drunken troops, they demanded the hussars share their schnapps. When the drunken scouts refused, a brawl ensued, which led to a soldier firing his gun. A member of the infantry then shouted “Turci! Turci!” (“Turks! Turks!”). The hussars and most of the infantry fled in a panic, believing the Ottoman army was about to attack. The uproar caused an artillery officer to come to the conclusion the camp was under fire, so he ordered his cannons to open fire. Many soldiers therefore woke to combat and began firing at every shadow. Two days later, the Ottoman army arrived at the Austrian camp to find 1,200 casualties (some sources have stated as many as 10,000) and simply claimed Karansebes.
The Mars Climate Orbiter was a robotic space probe that was launched in 1998 by NASA, with the aim of studying the Martian climate and surface, as well as surface changes. It was also created to relay communications in the Mars Surveyor 1998 program for Mars Polar Lander.
However, NASA lost the $125 million orbiter in 1999, as the engineering team at Lockheed Martin made the mistake of using English units of measurement, while the agency team opted to use the more commonly employed metric system. It was undoubtedly a pricey learning experience for NASA and a setback for scientific discovery.
Following the outbreak of the Crimean War, Britain, France, and Turkey took a stance against Russia, making it difficult for the nation to defend or supply Alaska, as all sea routes were controlled by allied ships. While tensions mounted between Russia and London, the relationship between Russia and the US was stronger than ever. Both nations therefore came up with the idea of Russia selling Alaska to the United States.
While the decision was widely criticized by the press, public, and congress, both nations signed an agreement on March 30, 1867, to sell Alaska for $7.2 million, which was approximately two cents per acre. The sale was, however, a big mistake for Russia. By the 1880s and 1890s, gold mining had commenced in Alaska, providing America with hundreds of millions of dollars. Alaska now produces more gold than any other US state except Nevada.
The sinking of RMS Titanic is one of the biggest maritime disasters in history, as more than 1,500 people lost their lives aboard the ill-fated liner during the early morning hours of April 15, 1912, after it hit an iceberg on its maiden voyage from Southampton to New York City.
Much controversy surrounded the sinking of the ship, as many believe the chairman of the White Star Line ordered Captain Smith to speed up the Titanic to reach New York in record time so that it would wow the world with its speed, size, and luxury. The biggest mistake was, however, providing only 20 lifeboats, enough to seat 1,178 people, for the more than 2,200 on board. What’s even more shocking is the ship was originally supposed to house 32 lifeboats, but the designers believed it would clutter the deck. (Titanic also carried 48 life rings and 3,500 life belts, but they weren’t going to save anyone in the freezing water in which it sank.) Following the maritime disaster, laws regarding boat safety were significantly changed.
The Chernobyl disaster occurred on April 26, 1986, and is undoubtedly the worst nuclear disaster in history. It occurred during a late-night safety test involving a station blackout power failure simulation. As a result, all safety systems were deliberately turned off. A combination of reactor design flaws and the operators arranging the core in a way that went against the test checklist resulted in an uncontrollable reaction. Due to no effective containment structure within the plant, this led to an open-air graphite fire that produced updrafts for nine days.
The steam blasts at the start of the reaction caused the immediate deaths of 31 people. 134 servicemen were later hospitalized with acute radiation sickness, and 28 firemen and employees passed away due to the effects of the radiation within days or months of the disaster. It is also believed that approximately five million people were exposed to radiation in Ukraine, Belarus, and Russia.
Alexander Fleming revolutionized medicine thanks to his discovery of benzylpenicillin, the world’s first antibiotic substance, in 1928. However, the world-changing discovery was made by chance, and it is most likely one of the best mistakes in history. Fleming left his lab for a month to go on vacation with his family. Upon his return, the Scottish doctor realized that one of his petri dishes of staphylococci had a fungus growing in it, which destroyed the surrounding bacteria.
Surprised by his finding, he grew the mold in a pure culture and ultimately discovered that it could annihilate bacteria. He coined the antibiotic substance the fungus produced as “mold juice.” While it took a few years for penicillin to reach the public, it was eventually used to treat Allied wounds and saved countless lives during World War II.
At 7:48 AM local time on December 7, 1941, Japan launched a surprise aerial attack on the US naval base at Pearl Harbor, located on Oahu island, Hawaii. Hundreds of Japanese fighter planes damaged or destroyed 19 American naval vessels as well as over 300 airplanes. Around 2,400 Americans also lost their lives, and over 1,000 more were injured, leading the United Statesto declare war on Japan the next day.
The big mistake Japan made was concentrating its attack on US battleships, as it would have been more beneficial to target Pearl Harbor’s fuel reserves and repair yards. Japan also chose the wrong day to attack, as the Pacific Fleet’s aircraft carriers and their personnel were away from the naval base. The US Navy could therefore quickly recover from the surprise attack.
Nazi Germany’s invasion of the Soviet Union was undoubtedly a big turning point in World War II. Despite making a nonaggression pact with Russia in 1939, Hitler stated in Mein Kampf that the Soviet Union was always an enemy of Nazi Germany. The pact was, however, an effective way for both nations to buy time and potentially prevent a two-front war.
Hitler had already decided to invade Russia once he controlled Europe. The invasion of the Soviet Union started on Sunday, June 22, 1941, and the attack, known as Operation Barbarossa, ultimately led to what the Russians called the Great Patriotic War. In a bid to defend both its people and borders, the Soviet Union joined the Allies. On top of that, Hitler’s army was not prepared for an arduous Russian winter. Germany lost 750,000 troops before November.
Many believe attacking the Soviet Union was Hitler’s biggest mistake. If Germany had never invaded Russia, Stalin may never had entered World War II and may have continued to supply Germany with materials for war.
Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria and his wife, Sophie, were visiting Sarajevo and had ignored warnings of terrorist activity by the nationalist group the Black Hand. At 10:10 AM on June 28, 1914, Nedjelko Cabrinovic, a member of the organization, threw a bomb at the archduke’s car. However, the assassination attempt was thwarted when the driver spotted the object and accelerated the automobile, which landed under a vehicle behind the royal couple’s open-air car, injuring both the passengers and spectators.
Following a short rest, the archduke and his wife were adamant about visiting the people who had been injured by the bomb at the hospital. However, the driver was not notified that the royal couple’s itinerary had changed. Once he was informed, he had to turn the car around onto a side street. At the same time, Gavrilo Princip, a Black Hand member, was standing across that street after the assassination attempt had failed. Seizing the opportunity, Princip quickly walked across the street and shot Sophie and the archduke. Tragically, this one mistake not only led to the murder of the royal couple, but it triggered World War I, which claimed the lives of 18 million people.