Quote “Six months after my ex-narcissist left me, he returned to gather a few items he’d left behind. Because of the reading and healing I’d done since he left, I knew he wasn’t returning because he missed me. I suspected he needed both the items and likely wanted sex.

I’d made up my mind prior to him arriving I was going to be strong and nurture my hard work and healing by not giving in to his charms. It was more difficult than I’d expected, as he looked better than ever after not having seen him in six months. The chemistry between us was always prolific. I maintained my position and explained to him that going there with him would set me back emotionally.

During this brief but pleasant visit I managed to affirm several things that provided me further conviction he is definitely a covert narcissist:

After six months….

  1. He never said he missed me.
  2. He never said he loved me.
  3. He never accepted any blame for the breakup.
  4. He felt the circumstances of his work were the cause.
  5. He said, “It wasn’t you I left.” — I’m still trying to figure out what this means ….
  6. He told me if the circumstances change, we should try again
  7. He told me he was there to support me (which is a lie because
  8. I hadn’t seen him in six months)
    In summary, a true narcissist isn’t capable of missing you; they aren’t wired with emotional empathy, but many have learned intellectual empathy and have learned what to say (ie; “I miss you so much!” ) to lure you back in to ‘try again.’ My advice: stand your ground. Serve your own need to heal instead.

via (2) Home – Quora


3 thoughts on “Getting too much on Narcissism in my Quora mailbox these days. Is this the same writer? I wonder.”

  1. Narcissism seems to be the diagnosis for everything from toothache to dysentery, it is notoriously difficult to diagnose by the relevant specialists in the field, let alone the pundits who throw it around like confetti. The biggest issue is that it presents like so many other conditions it often becomes the default. I wonder that we need to step back and think before rushing to use it.

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