Take a look below at the amusing takes we found for a number of popular business terms!

ability: The virtue you are forced to use if your boss has no daughter.

adminisphere: The levels of management where big, impractical, and counterproductive decisions are made.

advertising: The art of convincing people to spend money they don’t have for something they don’t need. (Will Rogers)

all new: Not compatible with earlier versions.

ambiguity: The lack of clarity in speech, or something like that.

applicating: The act of submitting applications.

argument: An exchange of words between people with diametrically opposed views, all of whom know that they are right. (Kevin Boddington)

blamestorming: A method of collectively finding one to blame for a mistake no one is willing to confess to. Often occurs in the form of a meeting of colleagues at work, gathered to decide who is to blame for a problem.

boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

cell phone: An electronic device for one-to-one communication and one-to-many irritation. (Chris Simmons)

circular reasoning: See reasoning, circular.

civil servant: Someone who isn’t civil and doesn’t serve.

class action: A stylish deed.

clicklexia: A disorder often suffered by novice computer users in which they have a tendency to double-click on items which only require one click, often resulting in two items opening instead of just one.

clone: 1. An exact duplicate; “Our product is a clone of their product.” 2. A shoddy, spurious copy; “Their product is a clone of our product.”

committee: An entity that keeps minutes and loses hours.

comprehension: Something that one has to get in order to get it. (Dave Peters)

compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

computer: An electronic time-saving device that is commonly used for time-wasting activities. (Warwick Annear)

computer expert: Someone who has not read the instructions, but who will nevertheless feel qualified to install a program and, when it does not function correctly, pronounce it incompatible with the operating system. (Priscilla Mann)

cooperate: Used of oneself, to enter into a constructive collaboration with another person. Used of someone else, to do exactly as one is told. (Gordon Burnside)

corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility. (Ambrose Bierce)

design: What you later regret not doing.

dictionary: The only place where success comes before work.

DIY: Damage-It-Yourself. (Mike Allen)

egosurfing: Typing your own name into google to see who’s talking about you.

experience: 1. The ability to repeat one’s mistakes with ever-increasing confidence. (Patrick Hoyte) 2. What you get when you don’t get what you want.

FAQ: Frequently Avoided Questions. A company’s attempt to answer commonly asked questions such as, “How do I get technical support?” (Guy Kawasaki)

feature: A hardware limitation, as described by a marketing representative.

flow chart: A graphic representation of a bowl of spaghetti.

freelance: To collect unemployment.

hardware: The parts of a computer which can be kicked.

inbox: A catch basin for everything you don’t want to deal with, but are afraid to throw away.

initiative: Deliberately disobeying a destructive order from your manager and being right in the long run.

innumeracy: An ineptitude for mathematics which results in the fear of all sums. (Simon Stacey)

instruction manual: An explanation of how to use something written in a way that is easily understood only by the author. (Phil Smith)

jury: Twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. (Robert Frost)

life insurance: term (coined by the greatest marketer of all time) for a plan that keeps you poor all your life so you can die rich

management: The art of getting other people to do the work.

management consultant: Someone who tells you how to do improve doing something that he or she can’t do at all. (Shankar Sivanandan)

marketing: The art of selling a product that doesn’t cost much to produce in such a way that people will take out a small loan to own it. (Jo Buckingham)

meeting: An assembly of people coming together to decide what person or department not represented in the room must solve a problem.

mouse: An input device designed to make computer errors easier to generate.

multislacking: Doing two or more useless activities simultaneously instead of working.

negotiate: To seek a meeting of the minds without the knocking together of heads.

outsourcery: The belief that all business problems can magically be solved by outsourcing.

password: Series of letters and numbers written on a post-it note and stuck on a monitor.

phonesia: The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer. (Rich Hall)

recursive: See recursive.

résumé: The closest many of us will ever come to perfection.

search engine: A program that enables computer users to locate information and advertisers to locate computer users. (Damien Whinnery)

self-employed: Jobless.

state of the art: Anything that you can’t afford.

strategy: A long-range plan whose merit cannot be evaluated until sometime after those creating it have left the organization.

tact: The art of getting your point across without stabbing someone with it.

telecrastination: The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you’re only six inches away.

television: A commercial delivery system.

timefoolery: Setting the alarm clock ahead of the real time in order to fool yourself into thinking you are not getting up so early. (Rich Hall)

tycoon: A person for whom the government makes customized laws.

unemployment office: A career placement service for humanities majors.

unfair competition: Selling more cheaply than we do.

Windows: The times between when companies innovate and when Microsoft incorporates. (Guy Kawasaki)

wisdom: Knowing what to do with what you know.